Struggling Moms Part II

Old 03-13-2012, 02:51 AM
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Struggling Moms Part II

Hi everybody!

Hadn't been on the board lately, so I'm trying to catch up my board readings I want every Mom out there to know "I hear ya" and "I'm with you".

I've been busy house hunting and have found my little slice of heaven!
I was getting very discouraged while looking and I kept thinking..."let God get in the drivers seat, things will work out". Lo and behold, while driving (I'm sure God was at the wheel this time), came upon a cute little house just perfect for me.

This part of my recovery journey is new to me. I have no time to look at who is doing what and which disaster I can avert. It almost feels like I am riding a wave, not knowing when or where I will land. It's a little scary, but exhilerating at the same time. My thought processes and actions are different and I wonder, when did this happen? Maybe when I accepted my adult children for who they are, nothing more. Maybe it's when I accepted that I must let go and let God (which meant I had to stop being God).

My adult sons seem to be motivated now that there is a definite deadline date to move out. They are busy fixing an old car to save money (their share from the house sale). I can hear them discussing living options (biting my tongue to contain my input). My adult daughter and her son are making plans to move also. No drama, no chaos lately????

I continue to reach out for support and meditate on my daily readings because I know, living alone will be a big transition. I've learned how to quiet the voices in my head that try to instill fear by hanging onto my favorite quotes. I'm also aware I will feel some deep emotions when the time comes for everybody to set out on their own. But I am holding onto my faith and recovery to get me through.

So just wanted to send big huggs to all,
Hope
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Old 03-13-2012, 03:40 AM
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Ann
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Hope, I am so glad this is all working out for you and that you found a nice place.

Change can be scary, but I find with recovery I anticipate change differently today. Yes, it means giving up the old, but it also means embracing the new adventure ahead and wonderful new beginnings. As I get older I am more aware than ever that life is ever changing, so I am grateful for my recovery because it doesn't jolt me at every twist and turn and hindsight shows me the gift that came with every change in my life.

Glad you checked in, I was wondering how this was all unfolding for you.

Hugs
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Old 03-13-2012, 08:13 AM
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hope2be, I started hearing Frank Sinatra singing My Way as I read your post

Wishing you many blessings as you continue go forward.
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Old 03-13-2012, 09:49 AM
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hope, thank you for the update. Change is scary. I know I have a tendancy to create "mental monsters" and cross bridges before I get to them, many that I need never have crossed in the first place! Silly me. Since I have disconnected from my AS, and have more or less gone no contact with him, I find myself at times not quite knowing what to do with myself. I'm having to re-learn how to live a normal life. This normal stuff is hard work after coming from all the simple reacting of drama and chaos!!! (slaps self) While the peace is oh so nice..... at times I catch myself feeling like I'm waiting for the next shoe to drop. And when the phone rings, I still cringe with anxiety. I know it's only been a few weeks, and it's a process, and I have a list of things to do, but I'm struggling with accepting this newfound freedom. Sounds crazy, doesn't it?
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Old 03-13-2012, 05:22 PM
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So happy for you and your new adventure. From one mom to another, I think you are doing a great thing. I pray you have lots of peace and relaxation in your new home.
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Old 03-13-2012, 06:20 PM
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wishing you many happy quiet moments in your future home , hey i just finally understand that the world doesnt stop if we take a break, go figure...sending huggggs back at ya
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Old 03-14-2012, 02:00 AM
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Originally Posted by KuanYin View Post
I'm having to re-learn how to live a normal life. This normal stuff is hard work after coming from all the simple reacting of drama and chaos!!! (slaps self) While the peace is oh so nice..... at times I catch myself feeling like I'm waiting for the next shoe to drop. And when the phone rings, I still cringe with anxiety. I know it's only been a few weeks, and it's a process, and I have a list of things to do, but I'm struggling with accepting this newfound freedom. Sounds crazy, doesn't it?
This morning, for some reason, this is how I feel..waiting for the other shoe to drop. I gues it's like you stated Kuan, after all the simple reacting, I feel overwhelmed at times taking care of just me, because it is so new.

What's different today is I tell myself that I will be OK, no matter what.

We Moms must remember the inner strength we have always possessed. It has allowed us to move mountains for others. I keep that thought in my head as I face all this newness. HOwever, I still need much support which I gather mostly from here. I've learned not to try to do it solo anymore.

Huggs to all,
Hope
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