I think this is it
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: casablanca
Posts: 282
I think this is it
I have tried to quit drinking for over a decade now. I can not count how many relapses I have had in my life since I have seriously decided to stop. I have been in and out of AA so many times for the last 14 or so years.
Few months ago I've gotten a sponsor for the first time and started to seriously work the steps. I relapsed on my sponsor 4 or 5 times so far, last time was 10 days ago and it was a disastrous relapse with some irreparable damage.
I have gotten introspective and did some soul searching while hiding at home after this last screw up, figured out what was wrong with my program. I never had a God of my understanding. every time I worked the 3rd step; I really did not believe in what the step stood for as I always been agnostic. This time around I took the time to find and trust the God of my understanding. I reconnected with my sponsor, same sponsor who never gave up on me, and we are starting step one tomorrow all over again. Been sober 11 days now and I pray to God that this time is it.
Few months ago I've gotten a sponsor for the first time and started to seriously work the steps. I relapsed on my sponsor 4 or 5 times so far, last time was 10 days ago and it was a disastrous relapse with some irreparable damage.
I have gotten introspective and did some soul searching while hiding at home after this last screw up, figured out what was wrong with my program. I never had a God of my understanding. every time I worked the 3rd step; I really did not believe in what the step stood for as I always been agnostic. This time around I took the time to find and trust the God of my understanding. I reconnected with my sponsor, same sponsor who never gave up on me, and we are starting step one tomorrow all over again. Been sober 11 days now and I pray to God that this time is it.
notincontrol,
I hope this time is it for you also. I know the frustration you are feeling. Give this your best shot. SR has been invaluable in keeping me from drinking. I wish you the very best.
I hope this time is it for you also. I know the frustration you are feeling. Give this your best shot. SR has been invaluable in keeping me from drinking. I wish you the very best.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
That's awesome...Sounds like you have a great sponsor...When you get to step 3...Use that God of your understanding to help you through the rest of the steps...I pray you get it right this time too...Congrats on 11 days...
PS...I like that username too...That's great...
PS...I like that username too...That's great...
Celebrating Recovery
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: London
Posts: 46
I am an atheist and i managed to find a 'god'. It was that little voice or feeling that comes in and tells me to do the right thing. It's a great god to have - although I don't really acknowledge it by using the word as I find that a little difficult (yeah I'm a committed atheist)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: casablanca
Posts: 282
Thank you all for your responses, I started today step one (again) with my sponsor, we did an in depth step one which will take more than one meeting as opposed to before. It was great.
Glad you're back! I'm starting over with the steps too, after working the first three several times. Several false starts here too ... but we can learn from them and not make the same mistakes again. I'm pulling for you.
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