Is medical detox necessary?
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: South Florida
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Is medical detox necessary?
Don't know if this is the appropriate place for this question but since I am new here thought I would just try. :-) The counselor that my husband saw yesterday suggested medical detox. When I had called a few places checking on programs in the past week, they all suggested medical detox (without even really knowing the specifics of his drinking habits - because I don't even know them). I have several friends and even a family member who are recovering and none (except for one who was using heavy drugs) did a medical detox. If it truly is necessary that's fine but I just questioned that it seems to be the universal protocol when you talk to a treatment facility in light of the fact that I don't know anyone who has personally gone that route.
Part of me thinks it's a good idea simply for the fact that it will put him in a situation where he can't drink even if he is tempted for the time he is hospitalized but I also am wary of doing something that isn't really medically necessary just because practitioners need to cover their butts from a liability standpoint, kwim?
Part of me thinks it's a good idea simply for the fact that it will put him in a situation where he can't drink even if he is tempted for the time he is hospitalized but I also am wary of doing something that isn't really medically necessary just because practitioners need to cover their butts from a liability standpoint, kwim?
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: FL
Posts: 76
Without giving medical advice, since that's prohibited, what I will say about my husband being in detox is that it was extremely rough even in a treatment facility. His blood pressure skyrocketed and he had several withdrawal related issues. His sponsor, who many years ago attempted detox on his own, wound up in the ER with a blood pressure of over 200/100 and hallucinations.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest, USA
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Detox is brutal. In my travels with this disease, I have yet to hear a doctor recommend anything other than medically supervised detox.
In fact, a friend of a friend tried to detox himself at home a couple of weeks back and ended up in the hospital anyway with seizures and hallucinations, so.
In fact, a friend of a friend tried to detox himself at home a couple of weeks back and ended up in the hospital anyway with seizures and hallucinations, so.
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Sorry - should have clarified - I am not seeking medical advice - just wanting to make sure it isn't just a CYA type of thing. I'm not a huge skeptic but I am also aware of the huge liability insurance and litigation issues that professionals in the medical fields face.
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Originally Posted by JHJT
I have several friends and even a family member who are recovering and none (except for one who was using heavy drugs) did a medical detox.
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I just got back from the treatment center and I now agree that detox is the way to go. He has a history of hypertension and he is 54 - both factors increasing his risk and need for possible medical intervention. The detox they are recommending is three days. He won't miss too much work which was a big concern for him.
Just one more question though for those that know...this detox is three days. He has certainly gone three days without a drink before. He often does and hasn't felt bad. So, is the theory that (in this case) the detox would prevent him from having withdrawal symptoms that may possibly start after several days of no alcohol? In other words, he has been fine without drinking for three days so that's not the window we're worried about. The concern is what would happen on day four or five if he wasn't gradually "weaned"? I'm still confused on this.
Just one more question though for those that know...this detox is three days. He has certainly gone three days without a drink before. He often does and hasn't felt bad. So, is the theory that (in this case) the detox would prevent him from having withdrawal symptoms that may possibly start after several days of no alcohol? In other words, he has been fine without drinking for three days so that's not the window we're worried about. The concern is what would happen on day four or five if he wasn't gradually "weaned"? I'm still confused on this.
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I have to agree with anvil here.....right on the money.
For me, I was most definitely not "well" after 3 days dry. 3 days was nothing for me.
How many times has he "quit" drinking for 3+ days? How many times did he go back out? How many promises has he broken?
I understand it's hard to put yourself first but you're trying to help him while sacrificing yourself.
HE should be doing this research and decision making.
For me, I was most definitely not "well" after 3 days dry. 3 days was nothing for me.
How many times has he "quit" drinking for 3+ days? How many times did he go back out? How many promises has he broken?
I understand it's hard to put yourself first but you're trying to help him while sacrificing yourself.
HE should be doing this research and decision making.
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
3 days was insufficent for detox for me. 5 days medically supervised and my vitals were ok so I could go home. 2 more and I could resume work, but I would've been better off going to rehab after detox.
Also this:
Bullseye! Why is he not doing this?
Also this:
Originally Posted by anvilhead
so is HE doing any footwork here? cuz this is HIS sobriety.......not yours. HE should be doing the research and asking the questions......
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: FL
Posts: 76
When my husband went through rehab, they told him it would be three days. He wound up in detox for 12. At least at the facility he went to, detox involved medical care to help with withdrawal, medical monitoring, and regular 12 step meetings/group meetings as well as one on ones with a psychiatrist and addict therapist. Also, in his case, withdrawal symptoms started within 24 hours of not drinking - he'd sweat like a fiend and shake.
I'll also add that his stay was lengthened because of withdrawal symptoms. I also think they lengthened it because my husband, who is a lawyer, tried to outmanipulate the doctors about his recovery. They were pushing for him to get into inpatient treatment for at least 30-60 days and he wound up doing outpatient treatment.
I'll also add that his stay was lengthened because of withdrawal symptoms. I also think they lengthened it because my husband, who is a lawyer, tried to outmanipulate the doctors about his recovery. They were pushing for him to get into inpatient treatment for at least 30-60 days and he wound up doing outpatient treatment.
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Clarification - it actually is 5 days but he may be released earlier if vitals are ok.
To address some of the replies - this is just the medical detox part, certainly not all of his treatment program that I am discussing here. I started this post specifically for info on detox. And, yes, he has been doing the legwork - he was the one who set up and went to the meeting with the counselor yesterday and got all of the info. And he and I both know this is his decision. However, I want to understand the detox process as well which is why I spoke to the counselor myself - particularly because the detox is a medical issue and not just a recovery issue and it's something I am not familiar with. Also, we can't overlook the financial considerations of the various options and that is another reason I am talking to her - I handle the finances in our family. Not that I will make the decision on how he will proceed but I will certainly need to understand the practical aspects, like how much it will cost. Maybe I'm wrong here but I don't see how I can completely extricate myself from those elements. Again, he is the one who came to me, he is the one who is seeking treatment and he is the one to ultimately make the decision on what that treatment is. I am not pushing him or doing anything for him he should be doing (if someone feels otherwise please feel free to point out).
He's at his second AA meeting right now, a beginner's meeting. *Fingers crossed* that it is going well and a more positive experience than the one he went to the other day.
To address some of the replies - this is just the medical detox part, certainly not all of his treatment program that I am discussing here. I started this post specifically for info on detox. And, yes, he has been doing the legwork - he was the one who set up and went to the meeting with the counselor yesterday and got all of the info. And he and I both know this is his decision. However, I want to understand the detox process as well which is why I spoke to the counselor myself - particularly because the detox is a medical issue and not just a recovery issue and it's something I am not familiar with. Also, we can't overlook the financial considerations of the various options and that is another reason I am talking to her - I handle the finances in our family. Not that I will make the decision on how he will proceed but I will certainly need to understand the practical aspects, like how much it will cost. Maybe I'm wrong here but I don't see how I can completely extricate myself from those elements. Again, he is the one who came to me, he is the one who is seeking treatment and he is the one to ultimately make the decision on what that treatment is. I am not pushing him or doing anything for him he should be doing (if someone feels otherwise please feel free to point out).
He's at his second AA meeting right now, a beginner's meeting. *Fingers crossed* that it is going well and a more positive experience than the one he went to the other day.
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 447
I agree with the others.
We aren't being mean...but we've been there and you are too close, too involved in this.
It is up to him to ask questions, find meeting schedules, and deal with all this.
you may handle the finances...but this is HIS recovery....he needs to figure it all out...and he will if he wants it bad enough and if he doens't...well you'll know without wasting thousands on detox...because he just won't bother to do any of it...- oh and he WILL blame YOU for not doing it for him.
I would suggest you try Alanon. It really does make it easier on US. We want to save them and we can't....and it helps with the coping of that realization and gives us tools to use so we don't keep sliding down the slippery slope of "helping".
I know it sounds cold but keep reading...
and you will be saying to yourself... ..."that won't happen to me, my A is different, I'm different..." oh so many other things... but it will be you, him, your family.
Any one of these terrible stories on here could be you in a year, a month, or 10 yrs...if he doesn't suceed in treatment and we want you to make it. When one of us makes it...learns and grows..we all do. We are very much all empowered by one another and we want you to fix YOU....because you can't fix him.
Good luck!!!
We aren't being mean...but we've been there and you are too close, too involved in this.
It is up to him to ask questions, find meeting schedules, and deal with all this.
you may handle the finances...but this is HIS recovery....he needs to figure it all out...and he will if he wants it bad enough and if he doens't...well you'll know without wasting thousands on detox...because he just won't bother to do any of it...- oh and he WILL blame YOU for not doing it for him.
I would suggest you try Alanon. It really does make it easier on US. We want to save them and we can't....and it helps with the coping of that realization and gives us tools to use so we don't keep sliding down the slippery slope of "helping".
I know it sounds cold but keep reading...
and you will be saying to yourself... ..."that won't happen to me, my A is different, I'm different..." oh so many other things... but it will be you, him, your family.
Any one of these terrible stories on here could be you in a year, a month, or 10 yrs...if he doesn't suceed in treatment and we want you to make it. When one of us makes it...learns and grows..we all do. We are very much all empowered by one another and we want you to fix YOU....because you can't fix him.
Good luck!!!
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
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I went through medical detox and highly recommend it. They keep close tabs on your vitals, give you meds to help you through the worst of it, feed you well, teach you some coping skills for when you get cravings, and allow you to generally spend a few days just taking care of yourself. I was there for 6 days, but could have left after 5. I asked to stay an extra day and my insurance ok'd it. After that, I did an IOP (intensive out patient program) for 6 weeks.
If your husband has a history of high blood pressure, I definitely recommend the medical inpatient detox.
If your husband has a history of high blood pressure, I definitely recommend the medical inpatient detox.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Hillsboro, OR
Posts: 10
Is a Detox Facility Necessary?
JHJT,
Hello, I realize that this subject is probably going 2 be questioned 4 a long time. "Oh, pleez know I am not a Doctor, just my opinion from a recovering addict/alcoholic." I do believe that a Doctor's opinion in your husbands case would be a good idea. That way he would be hopefully more knowledgeable with knowing Ur husbands Medical History.
I, on the other hand, did not go this route. This is my 4th time in Sobriety & my longest time being sober...I have been sober for 536-Days (17-months & 3-weeks), but whose counting...Lol Only 1 other time did
I make it 3-months.
I would not be alive 2-day or sober if it wasn't for the police taking me 2 a Hospital instead of charging me & putting me in jail. My Blood Alcohol Level was .319 & in our state the legal limit is anything under .08 The hospital put me on a Lockdown for 2-weeks, where with medication & Doctors I was able to Detox completely for the first time in 6-years. Following being discharged I immediately started an Intensive Outpatient Treatment Program, (5-days a week all day, for 6-months). I am alive 2-day, my marriage of 23-years is mended, & I am a mother again too my 7-kids + 4-grandkids.
Though my sobriety would not have lasted if it wasn't for the fact of me wanting 2 be sober, connecting myself with AA (tho i know this isn't 4 everyone).
I know longer keep my alcoholism a secret from my doctors, & I was shocked @ their amazing support thru this.
I think I rambled on 2 long. I do wish the best for your husband as well as U. I hope he is ready, willing, & able to get help...And he is a Lucky Man 2 have U be there by his side thru such a life-altering problem.
Smiles & Hugs,
Serenity537
Hello, I realize that this subject is probably going 2 be questioned 4 a long time. "Oh, pleez know I am not a Doctor, just my opinion from a recovering addict/alcoholic." I do believe that a Doctor's opinion in your husbands case would be a good idea. That way he would be hopefully more knowledgeable with knowing Ur husbands Medical History.
I, on the other hand, did not go this route. This is my 4th time in Sobriety & my longest time being sober...I have been sober for 536-Days (17-months & 3-weeks), but whose counting...Lol Only 1 other time did
I make it 3-months.
I would not be alive 2-day or sober if it wasn't for the police taking me 2 a Hospital instead of charging me & putting me in jail. My Blood Alcohol Level was .319 & in our state the legal limit is anything under .08 The hospital put me on a Lockdown for 2-weeks, where with medication & Doctors I was able to Detox completely for the first time in 6-years. Following being discharged I immediately started an Intensive Outpatient Treatment Program, (5-days a week all day, for 6-months). I am alive 2-day, my marriage of 23-years is mended, & I am a mother again too my 7-kids + 4-grandkids.
Though my sobriety would not have lasted if it wasn't for the fact of me wanting 2 be sober, connecting myself with AA (tho i know this isn't 4 everyone).
I know longer keep my alcoholism a secret from my doctors, & I was shocked @ their amazing support thru this.
I think I rambled on 2 long. I do wish the best for your husband as well as U. I hope he is ready, willing, & able to get help...And he is a Lucky Man 2 have U be there by his side thru such a life-altering problem.
Smiles & Hugs,
Serenity537
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: South Florida
Posts: 9
I'm reading through here trying to figure out what I said that may have come off as me trying to somehow do this for him and I think it was my sentence that read "I just got back from the treatment center and I now agree that detox is the way to go". I should have chosen my words more carefully there because I can see that many here (rightfully) are reading between the lines in these posts (as I know you have to because of a lot of the dysfunctional behavior that accompanies this whole mess many of us are in). Reading that sentence, I can see where it appears that I am searching out treatment for him and I was making the decision on detox for him. That's not the case. The counselor contacted me today to finish up some parts of the evaluation that they wanted family feedback on. She had some informational pamphlets for me to read for myself so I said I would stop by to pick them up before picking my son up at school (it's a few blocks from his school). When I did that, I just started asking questions on medical detox for my own information. I was honestly skeptical (as you can see in the original post on this thread) if it was necessary for anybody because I just didn't have the facts. So when I said "I think it's the way to go" I didn't mean to imply that I was making that decision for my husband. I meant that now I understand why medical detox is often necessary and not just some CYA thing for doctors - and also that I believe in light of my husband's hypertension, it would be the prudent decision from a medical standpoint in lieu of trying to "tough it out" on his own at home (but again I know it is his choice). He had gotten all of the same info himself yesterday so this info was not for him, it was truly for my edification.
I don't want to sound like I am making excuses to justify my or his actions because, while that has certainly happened at times and may certainly happen again, I honestly don't feel like that's what's happening here. But I appreciate everyone's thoughts and honesty and I know you aren't being mean. :-)
And Serenity537 - Congratulations on 536 days! That's wonderful!
I don't want to sound like I am making excuses to justify my or his actions because, while that has certainly happened at times and may certainly happen again, I honestly don't feel like that's what's happening here. But I appreciate everyone's thoughts and honesty and I know you aren't being mean. :-)
And Serenity537 - Congratulations on 536 days! That's wonderful!
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
JHJT - speaking for myself, I may have jumped to conclusions and I'm sorry for that. There is not a thing wrong with you educating yourself on this process.
Glad to hear your hubby went to an AA meeting. That's great!
Now, how about you? Have you checked out Alanon? You'll get tons of information there and be able to sit in a room full of people who have gone through or are going through nearly the same situation you're going through.
It's very easy for the family to get focused on what they can do to help the alcoholic that they forget they need to take care of themselves as well. That's where my concern is coming from.
Glad to hear your hubby went to an AA meeting. That's great!
Now, how about you? Have you checked out Alanon? You'll get tons of information there and be able to sit in a room full of people who have gone through or are going through nearly the same situation you're going through.
It's very easy for the family to get focused on what they can do to help the alcoholic that they forget they need to take care of themselves as well. That's where my concern is coming from.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 447
I do apologize if you think I may have jumped to conclusions as well...but....
(don't you hate that...
)
I gave my A an ultimatium... it was treatment (not just stop drinking) or he lost his family. Gave him 24 hrs to attend a meeting.
He missed it... he gave every excuse in the world why he couldn't go....
and I handed him a hefty bag and said "get your sh#% and get out..NOW".
he wanted ONE more chance..as he knew I was totally serious.
He attended his first meeting the next morning.
He has been in recovery for 18 mos. with NO slips .... NONE.
I think one of the reasons he has made it when so many others can't is that I am adament...you drink, your gone.
and I MEAN it.
I won't live with an active alcoholic. PERIOD>
Now that I know what my life CAN be...wild horses can't drag me and my family back in that hell....
One sip...gone.
One beer ...gone.
One bottle....gone.
It may not work for everyone but it worked for me.
BUT...recovery...oh it's still hard. We have communication issues. We have problems determining what is normal v. his A behaviors...AND normal v my codie behaviors... we don't know what NORMAL is....so everything is a struggle..
Everyday though ....I wake up and before i even get out of bed I thank God for my husbands sobriety. It changed our lives.
I still attend alanon...and probably will forever...as it really is the easiest way to find out whether what I'm dealing w/ is jsut my own distorted thinking or really a problem..lol..
still working on it.
I recommend you try it. FOR you...
(don't you hate that...
)I gave my A an ultimatium... it was treatment (not just stop drinking) or he lost his family. Gave him 24 hrs to attend a meeting.
He missed it... he gave every excuse in the world why he couldn't go....
and I handed him a hefty bag and said "get your sh#% and get out..NOW".
he wanted ONE more chance..as he knew I was totally serious.
He attended his first meeting the next morning.
He has been in recovery for 18 mos. with NO slips .... NONE.
I think one of the reasons he has made it when so many others can't is that I am adament...you drink, your gone.
and I MEAN it.
I won't live with an active alcoholic. PERIOD>
Now that I know what my life CAN be...wild horses can't drag me and my family back in that hell....
One sip...gone.
One beer ...gone.
One bottle....gone.
It may not work for everyone but it worked for me.
BUT...recovery...oh it's still hard. We have communication issues. We have problems determining what is normal v. his A behaviors...AND normal v my codie behaviors... we don't know what NORMAL is....so everything is a struggle..
Everyday though ....I wake up and before i even get out of bed I thank God for my husbands sobriety. It changed our lives.
I still attend alanon...and probably will forever...as it really is the easiest way to find out whether what I'm dealing w/ is jsut my own distorted thinking or really a problem..lol..
still working on it.
I recommend you try it. FOR you...
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