Loneywife

AH is currently overdosing. I'm paralyzed and don't know if I want to call an ambulance. This cycle has happened so many times, and when he wakes up in the hospital, he's agitated and nasty and resents the help.

I returned this afternoon after spending the night at a hotel, and he hadn't been acting quite right. I went out to an appointment and I came home and he's unresponsive. He's agreed he wants to go to detox and is supposed to go either tomorrow or Saturday.

His breathing is shallow and he won't wake up to pain stimuli. Should I just leave him be? I know I probably sound insensitive not calling an ambulance right away, but I hate the cycle that ensues when he is saved.

suki44883

Oh dear. Yes, you should definitely call 911 and get an ambulance out there immediately. There are ways to get away from an alcoholic without just letting them lay there and die. Please, call an ambulance!

KelleyF

Your not paralyzed

Call 911

john0777

Call an ambulance then find a meeting

incitingsilence

Make the call NOW!

greeteachday

Please call for help. What everyone posted is very accurate.

Impurrfect

((LW)) - I hope you've called 911 by now. This is not medical advice (I used to be an RN before addiction ended that career) but if you ever find someone with those symptoms, please do call 911.

Reaction to pain is, basically, a primal response. People will respond to pain even in a semi-coma but if not? It's serious.

I understand the feelings as you've been-there-done-that. I'm sending you lots and lots of extra hugs. I'm an RA and a codie with loved ones who are A's. After finding a loved one passed out on several occasions, I told her "I will make sure you're breathing and have a strong pulse. If not, I'll call 911, do CPR if I need to, but if you have those? You will lay where you're at".

I'm sorry you're going through this. I left my last XABF because he wanted to keep using and he died a couple years ago...pneumonia because using was more important than going to a dr. Had I been right there? I would not have been able to force him to get help (unless he was unconscious), I couldn't "fix" him, I couldn't make him want the recovery I'd found. He would have probably gone straight back to using, and there wasn't a damned thing I could do about it.

I had left him when I chose recovery, but I'd spent a couple decades trying to change three XABFs before I hit bottom.

You may not be there, yet. It's okay. Whether you're ready to jump off the rollercoaster of his addiction or not, we'll be here to love you until you love yourself enough to do what is best for YOU, regardless of what he does.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

washbe2

Pray you have called 911 and things are okay.

Justfor1

lonelywife, I'm assuming it's heroin. It is quite common for heroin addicts to overdose and when "waking up" with Narcon in the ambulance/hospital to become nasty. They have just lost their high & are now quite sober. Call 911 one last time and then get out of each others lives. The man could be dying!!

Loneywife

I called 911 thanks to you all. Thank you.

He was nearly dead and it was a very harrowing ride in the ambulance. Narcan and the EMTs saved his life. He's in the ER now.

Dee74

many prayers for you and your husband (((LW)))

D

Impurrfect

(((LW))) - adding more prayers, and a lot of hugs, to the both of you.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Loneywife

I'm home from the hospital finally. He's under the usual 48 hr psych hold and was a little out of it when I left. Thank you all for your support. This has really been a helpful place, as sometimes we all get a little clouded as far as what the right thing is.

Loneywife

He's an oxy addict, but it's really one in the same reaction. He's pissed because he's also in physical pain when they give him Narcan. Thank you for your support.

Ann

I'm glad you did the right thing, and that he will live to have another chance.

Please don't lost sight of the fact that YOU just went through trauma also, and maybe find some support while you think of what the next move for you should be.

I know my son OD'd a few times as well, and there came a point where I could no longer live in fear of "the next time".

"We" are not the only solution for them, we are not even a good one. There are many places that will help them if they are willing. If they are not willing, all the worry in the world cannot save them.

I will keep you both in my prayers.

helpme33

(((Lonelywife)))
You have posted of so many ODs I know you are emotionally drained. I am hoping they keep him for a while so you can rest and focus on YOU!

Please try to have a great weekend you deserve it!

Loneywife

Thank you so much for your kind words. I am struggling a lot right now and I want to scream.

Loneywife

I just came back from the hospital. He thanked me for saving his life, but he's still in denial about what pills caused his overdose.

He's on an anti seizure medication, which he's currently blaming for the overdose. He promised it would never happen again, but we've been through similar (just not as dramatic as last night) over a dozen times in the last month.

I honestly don't know if I have it in me to go through this with him again now or in the future.

I'm leaving our living room as trashed as it was when the EMTs came, as they had to move our furniture to save his life. I would normally clean it up, but I'm leaving for when he gets home.

Loneywife

I don't know if this post is going to cause a poop storm, but it is my philosophy on death and dying. The other thread has made me reflect on what went on last night.

We all deserve to be treated like human beings, especially during dying and death. My AH deserves to die with some dignity, if he chooses to end his life.

He was sitting on his favorite couch, with his dog, watching his favorite newscaster on TV, and he was dying. Who am I to shake him out of his peaceful slumber and bring him back into this world through the place he dreads most, the hospital.

tjp613

My heart just aches for you. I wish we could be there just to sit with you and have a cup of tea. I just can't imagine how you must be feeling. Traumatized? To be honest, you sound a little "flat" or numb. Are you ok? Do you have anyone you can lean on? (((Hugs)))