freedom1955

When I was in the drug world,
dipping into danger; doing things
a man shouldn't be doing for so
many years.

Buying just to keep my buzz going,
my legal scrip ran out in only 10
days.

I have learned so much in my walk
of recovery, I will no longer take
chances doing things I am not
suppose to do.

When I was popping my opiates
addiction so many people new
I was abusing my pills. At times
I would freely pass a couple out
here and there.

Feeding people flesh with pills and
alcohol . When I think back I was just
looking for attention.

I have learned if I am not happy with
my looks or my life I need to sit down
with a shrink and figure out a cure
why I am not happy being me. So many
years my shrink was numbing my feelings
just so I could handle living life. Every sense
they day I got on my knees and prayed
and said God I really know you are there.
I am so sorry for running scared for so
many years. Angry at you for how my looks
look, blaming you for allowing me to be born
with a ugly painful disease.Please forgive me
and take this addiction from me. At that moment
the desire to numb my mind totally left and
I have been free every sense then.

And I will still say being honest with myself
was a giant step of being a successful recovering
addict. I now accept how I was born I would rather
have it then someone else.

Taking chances, It isn't my cup of tea anymore to
please other flesh by doing things that are not
suppose to be done.