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I have no strength

Old 02-08-2012, 12:05 PM
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I have no strength

Today I feel very low. Why? Im been thinking about this life style in a long term and that really scares me.

People around me cheer for approaching weekend, parties and fun.

I can avoid these parties, but how long? There will be case where I won't be able to reject. Baby shower or kids birthdays, booze is part of any of them.

What a struggle.
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:16 PM
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I think that is the alcoholism talking to you about the bummer of a life you are going to leave behind. Tell it to go sit down. Its simply not true.

When I absolutely cannot avoid but going to a party with alcohol (rare, family stuff etc) I do so enjoy being sober while watching everyone else. Its rather amusing



Sobriety is very popular, and great times can be had.

Gotta agree with anvil..never been to a kids party or baby shower with booze.
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:19 PM
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Instead of thinking of the future ..... how about just enjoy today? It's not always easy to do but I find when I am able, I'm in a much better mood and my attitude is better.
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:24 PM
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What's interesting in recovery.. is that you come to a place where you think (like Anvil reacted , and I reacted), why on earth are people drinking? Or you think, that really sucks that these drunks aren't experiencing this moment with clarity like I am. I don't hang out with drinkers or drug users. Anyone I know that drinks, has a few drinks a year. When I see on my facebook or whatever about all the drunken parties and things like that, it's not envy that I feel.. it's honestly a little bit of pity, and annoyance at the immaturity and irresponsibility. That's just my .02.
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:27 PM
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You don't have to reject every party that your invited to for the rest of your life but you also have to realize that parties are not just a reason to drink. Parties are great, a reason to gather with friends, see family and just relax and have fun, alcohol is not required. Once your at party no one really cares what is in your glass as long as your having fun. Give yourself a chance to gather some strength and time in sobriety and soon enough you will be strong enough to attend a party without alcohol being a big concern. Hang in there and enjoy today.
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:31 PM
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Hi HF, I wonder (and get scared) of the same thing. I understand about the b-day parties & showers. Most showers I've been too served mimosas, wine or bloody marys or some spectacular punch. and the b-day parties were usually BBQ's and had beer, wine or something along the lines.

I agree with HappyHappySober, I'm a total rubberneck & can't wait to watch people in rare form at some summer events we will be attending this year. and guess what? One of the morons stumbling around won't be me! Won't my Mother-in-law be pleased? lol...
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:40 PM
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I did not mean heavy booze, but a glass of wine or two adults do drink on kids parties. What Im saying is even those parties are not safe.

Im dreading that day when Im invited to any of parties. I guess I will say no and stay home, how pathetic.
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:46 PM
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I hear ya..Was thinking same thing today.. How can I not drink forever (yeah I know, just worry about today) -- like vacations, summer, sitting on the deck with friends etc..

I'm just trusting what people say that it gets easier and there will come a time where we can feel comfortable at any event where alcohol is served and won't be envious of those that drink
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:47 PM
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I hear ya..Was thinking same thing today.. How can I not drink forever (yeah I know, just worry about today) -- like vacations, summer, sitting on the deck with friends etc..

I'm just trusting what people say that it gets easier and there will come a time where we can feel comfortable at any event where alcohol is served and won't be envious of those that drink
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:53 PM
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brdlvr

I'm just trusting what people say that it gets easier and there will come a time where we can feel comfortable at any event where alcohol is served and won't be envious of those that drink

Well... this sounds nice. But how long does it take to get the confidence like that! What if that takes years? Its too long...
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:55 PM
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Originally Posted by Healthyfood View Post
Today I feel very low. Why? Im been thinking about this life style in a long term and that really scares me.

People around me cheer for approaching weekend, parties and fun.

I can avoid these parties, but how long? There will be case where I won't be able to reject. Baby shower or kids birthdays, booze is part of any of them.

What a struggle.
Sounds like you have forgotten what you felt like when you arrived here in the first place.
You are remembering the fleeting fun of drinking and forgetting the horrible results of it after. Hopefully you won't have to repeat the process to be reminded.
I attend meetings regularly to be reminded that it isn't any better out there for an alcoholic like me and when I entertain the thoughts that it is.. I'm skating on thin ice.

Best of luck to you.

Bob R.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:21 PM
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2granddaughters

I do remember those nights, those never ending nights me being drunk.

Now being sober I just have no one to talk to about my feelings. None of my friends know about my addiction and I will not tell them ever. Why? Because they will start testing me, have I really quit the booze.

You guys are only friends I can honestly talk to.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:23 PM
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Recovery can be more fun than you might think. We have dances, beach outings, camping trips and a lot of other things that we do in recovery. I have a choice of going to a drug and booze party or going to a recovery function. I have more fun in recovery than I ever did drinking and drugging. Try and do some service work in recovery and be apart of and not apart from. It has helped me a lot in recovery. This is just my opinion. logo
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:25 PM
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If you can't be honest with your "friends" who can you be honest with?

I'm not judging, really ....... but may be it's time for some new friends?
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Healthyfood View Post
Baby shower or kids birthdays, booze is part of any of them.
.
I've been to many, many baby showers and kids birthdays, and never once, ever, has alcohol been a part of it.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:28 PM
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I wish some one offers me camping or skiing trip. Im in. I can't even think today.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:30 PM
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I stayed away from all social events where alcohol was the main fixture for a few months, until I knew I wouldn't waver on my commitment to never drinking again.

It worked for me, and I still think those few months were a great investment - and a drop in the bucket time wise.

If you're feeling like a hermit tho HF, maybe it's time to try and make some new sober friends?

D
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:31 PM
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I can't be honest with my friends, because I tried to explain my problem before. All they said was that I was fine and there was nothing wrong to have a drink.

But I did not tell that I drunk at home...

This place is the only place I can be honest.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:34 PM
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Anna

I've been to baby showers and they served very little alco like wine and beer (couple glasses per evening) , but for me that is a potential trap to fall in and stay there for weeks.

I just need to learn to say no thanks and walk away.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:36 PM
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I find it is much like quitting smoking. There were times when I had to take each and every minute as they came, but not one minute without alcohol or cigarettes has ever harmed me in any way shape or form.

Try not to think about such a big picture. Enjoy this moment in time. When you get invited to one of those parties, just go. Nobody will force booze down you. You will just elect not to drink then as you elect not to drink now.

It doesn't hurt. It's not uncomfortable. It's life. Enjoy it and live it.
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