NoHo

Ever stop to think about the number of times you woke up in a panic over drinking behavior relative to the number of times you drank? At my very worst, I guess that it was about 1 in every 5 times I drank - so about once a week. Over the course of my drinking career, it was about 1 in 20 or 30. So, every time I drank I had a 5-20% chance of engaging in behavior that I would seriously regret.

Now, if I combine that with the chances of having run into someone from my professional life on any given night, it makes me wonder how I could ever be so stupid. Anytime I picked up a drink, I was not only running the risk of getting toasted, but doing so in the company of someone who could have ruined my career.

Anna

No question that alcoholism causes all kinds of risky behaviour.

I'm glad you're doing well.

Hevyn

I know, NoHo - how could we have been so oblivious? Gives me chills sometimes.

We're never going back to those bad old days.

jocata

I think I woke up in a panic almost everytime I drank toward the end. This happened even when I drank alone at home and didn't even go anywhere.

Awful stuff.

God bless.

AloneAlot

After 6 days of not drinking Im feeling that shock and embarrassment....wondering who saw me the last month of my drinking cuz i was blackin out a lot....what a realization of how stupid i have been acting under the influence.of BUD LIGHT! Geezzzzz

Hevyn

AloneAlot - You never have to go back there again. The memories of those who saw you in bad shape will fade. They'll remember the real you - the one who is healing & posting on here.

NoHo

In my experience, there is a point in recovery where we become comfortable "owning" who we were when we drank. That doesn't mean that we cease to regret what we did or the impact on others, but we come to terms with the fact that we were in that state. That comfort grows with every passing day of sobriety, as we become increasingly confident in our ability to avoid repetition of those days.

endlesspatience

The odds of doing something I seriously regretted just kept higher and higher. Losing my keys, missing appointments, saying foolish things to strangers or friends. Just about every time to be honest something regretful happens. Now I am at the stage where drinking at all is a regretful thing. I put that down to AA.

augustwest

No, i have not stopped to think about that. If i did my head would explode.