skidmark

Okay well a little about me bare with me it took alot of guts to reelect my memories..Not saying my name, but I am currently 15 going to 16 in 3 months I think. When I was 13/14I started to use tobacco and opiates and marijouna. The opiates were called vicodins the highest mg I started using about 14 pills a day and completely out of it intill one day school started I started getting withdraws because I tried quitting and while I stopped for 3 days I started an another addiction cutting. Few weeks or a month went by ( sorry memory is blurred) I overdosed and spilled my guts to my parents about everything I wanted help so I went to a pyscho ward/ rehab on thanksgiving. After all that I stopped the use of pills got therapy and got on anti depressants called prozak and started a lot of weed and still cut few weeks or months Came by the Prozac had a reverse side effect witch made me suicidal and attempted one night, my friend convinced me to call 911 so I did and they all came blah blah I stopped cutting got off medication was sober for half of year maybe honestly blacked out but this school year started and I went the opposite I started abusing adderall I usually do 100 mg a day so that's about 9 pills and sometimes drink or abuse other medicine like cold medicine and weed..But I'm now trying again to be sober.. But while I'm sober my grades drop .. And I feel like adderall has made me have permanet damage to my brain like psychosis and it won't go away I see things and hear things .. I sometimes have tremors like shakes .. Rapid eye movement.. Zone out.. Sometimes black out.. Insomnia .. I lost all my friends good and bad .. I'm alone and been confused for awhile.. And sometimes get delusions which I swear they are real but Im not sure I lost reality?. Will it get better I have a huge feeling I'll start again .. Adderall is extremely addictive..

NewBeginning010

Hi Skid, Welcome to SR... you will find a lot of support here. There is also a substance abuse section as well that might be helpful to you.

Yes, it does get better but it does take some time.

All of the best in your recovery, you can do this

Djelen

All the very best to you! There is loads of help to be had on here for all sorts of problesm ...take each day or hour at a time ~ not so scary that way.

jocata

Welcome Skidmark!

You should talk to your doc. honestly about all of your drug abuse and about your hallucinations. Be open and completely honest with them or they won't be able to help you effectively.

Keep posting and reading here too.

God bless.

Dee74

Hi Skid
welcome

Like the others here, I think your first step should be seeing a Dr - and be honest and open with them. I've never taken adderal but I know from reading others stories here that the effects can persist for some time.

It might also be good to see a counsellor if your school has one - they will almost certainly have access to local resources and programmes that will help too

You'll also find a lot of help and support here as well - we're glad to have you with us

D