MycoolFitz

I posted yesterday about how hard making amends was but it came to my mind it was less about forgiveness than accepting responsibility for certain actions, something as an alcoholic I haven't been so great at. Maybe the key is not forgiveness but moving forward, not perpetuating, repeating, replaying. I don't know.

choublak

Any relationship (romantic or otherwise) is like a team. If you're passed out drunk all the time, it's hard to be a part of that team.

camedown

My view on amendments is that they are a method of permanently and intimatly changing the behaviors that led you to harm others. My biggest amendments are to my ex and my daughter. My kid's one I haven't made it formal yet, I am just trying to foster a relationship that was abandoned for fifteen years. My ex, I was up front with, and brutally honest. She has always been supportive, wanting only for a relationship between my kid and I to foster itself. There was no specific apology or act that I could do. We talk, a lot, about my life, and how it led me to the point I was at, and how those mechanisms led me to do the things I did. It is healing both of us. I have made most of my amendments this way, committing to my new lifestyle and being present for others, instead of being selfish and hiding, ignoring those who love me.