freedom1955

Why God was I born to suffer
Born with a painful disease both
physical and mental.
If I think about how I was born I
feel like hiding in a shell.
As I understand the history of a
man who walked the earth years
ago spreading love and peace.
Healing the ones that just touched
his robe.
Bringing back one that has passed on
delivering ones that where tormented
by the evil one.
Healing the crippled homeless man and
making the blind see.
As I understand He heals the ones that He
wants to heal.
Time passed on and He died on the cross for
our sins and are healing. And then the ones
He wants to heal.
And then as I understand it He was buried and
rose again in three days.
Then in a short time went back to Heaven and sent
a comforter The Holy Spirit.
He heals the ones He wants to heal they say it isn't
true a person must not have enough faith
Well when I was younger I prayed for a healing and
never received and I turned my back on the one above.
For 38 years I ran with the dark side and I never got
a healing from darkness. So I came back to the light
in 1/12/08 and am telling my story that I accept how
I was born all the stares all the jokes, the Man upstairs
gave me a mind to handle the mental abuse and to
spread my story how He delivered me from my addiction
to party and sin.

doggonecarl

It can't have been easy. I'm glad you've found your faith and have a mission to share your story.

Impurrfect

(((Freedom))) - I read your blog, and I do understand what you are going through.

Personally, I have a strong faith in God. There are things that have happened in my life (read - why ME, GOD?!?!!) and those I love.

I don't understand why things that have happened had to be the way they are, but I do have faith. I could curse my own addiction. However, if it wasn't for that, I wouldn't have so many awesome friends that I've met on SR. I probably wouldn't even notice the things that make me smile today.

There are things that happen in life I just don't like. However, some of those very things have made me into a better person?

I try to look at life like my mom did - she had JUST had me and was told she had a fatal heart disease that was going to kill her. She lived every single day as if it were a "present" and survived 29 years.

I have an aunt I dearly love. In the last 6 months, she has buried her youngest son as well as a niece and nephew. Now the mother of this niece/nephew is dying in the hospital. I don't get it, how MUCH does one single person have to deal with! She also has a severe and chronic medical condition.

I worry, I pray. I am grateful that I'm not so lost in my own addiction that I'm not there for her.

Today? That's the best I can do. We're here for you, too.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy