jwolf

I know I need to attend an AA meeting but I am scared. That may sound silly,but I have no clue what to expect. I used to have a picture in my head about AA meetings.....I pictured a bunch of hobo looking drunkard men. I know that is not the case now. It would be nice to know what to expect. I don't do really good being the center of attention and I hate to say it but I am embarrassed. What if i see someone I know? Well, I guess that's okay because they are in the same boat as me.

desertsong

There are people from all walks of life at AA. My home group is both men and women, between 22-75 years of age. It's wonderful. There is such a richness of sharing there. I didn't know what to expect from my first meeting either, but I was very pleasantly surprised. One thing I did before I went, though ... I called the AA hotline here in town and asked to have someone call me. She was wonderful. We had a long talk and the next day she came and got me and took me to the meeting. It was nice to "know" someone on some level before I went, rather than going in "cold." She introduced me to people and they all came around me with phone numbers, encouragement, and support. They are a really fantastic group.

You're not required to share if you don't want to. I spent my first meeting just listening and taking it all in, and I learned a lot. I did feel a bit like a fish out of water that first time, but by my second and third meetings, I felt like part of the "family." I think you will be pleasantly surprised. Just make sure your "home group" is a place where you feel comfortable. I was fortunate enough to make my first group my home group, but if for any reason you aren't comfortable with the people at your first meeting, try another group. I go to my home group 6 days a week except for Saturdays, and then I go to an all-women's group. Both have been godsends for me, and now I can't imagine going a single day without a meeting. They keep me grounded and accountable, and they also give me the encouragement to stay sober.

Don't be embarrassed ... just go. All of us had our "first meeting" and we know how daunting it can seem, but I think you'll be glad you went. Get the first one under your belt, and the rest will come easier. Let us know how it went.

laurie6781

Here you go jwolf:

Your First AA Meeting<

That is kind of what I thought to, however, upon getting the 'meeting directory' for all of Los Angeles I found that there were over 400 meetings a week in Beverly Hills and that was in 1981, lol

You will find folks from all walks of life at meetings ............................... doctors, lawyers, judges, governors, police chiefs, policemen, veterinarians, war vets, nurses, CEOs, homeless folks, etc

Let us know how it goes.

Love and hugs,

Nonya911

:rotfxko

I love it!! I feel you 100%. I've thought about going to a meeting too and I'm also scared of running into someone I know. Another thing that worries me is that I'm an atheist and I'm scared they will try to 'bring me to Jesus' or something.

IndaMiricale

Almost everyone has said excatly what you are saying.

Give it shot , you will be surprised. And hopefully you like it as much as I do.

And relax Nonya nobody is going to try to bring you to Jesus. AA is sprititual not religious.

Many people are atheist or agnostic, give it a try if you dont like it AA will refund your misery.

Good love, Inda

sugarbear1

The first meetings were men in suits; shirts, ties & jackets with matching pants. Most with jobs or occupations. Kinda where "anonymous" came from-to protect their livelihood (ability to work & make money).

jocata

You're likely to find people from all walks of life and all ages. If you listen, you'll probably here your story in someone else's. Sometimes I share, sometimes I just listen. Try several different meetings if you can. They all seem to have their own flavor.

For me it was confusing at first, because I was new at it and still foggy, but I kept going back. Some of my best friends now are ones I met in AA.

God bless.

Stryfe

AA meetings are just as diverse as people who drink. In my short four months of going to AA meetings, I have seen the whole spectrum. Many of the people who attend meetings in and around my neighborhood are older people in their 40's and up. Many of these people have 20+ years sobriety. Most of these people are very successful and live comfortable happy lives free of alcohol and dugs. There are doctors, layers, business owners as well as starry eyed young people trying to make ends meet. You can learn a lot from these people. Older folks in AA are great for sponsorship. My sponsor has 20+ years sobriety. However, that doesn't mean you can't pick a sponsor close to your age.

On the weekends, I go to youth meetings in DC since I live in the Maryland suburbs. These meetings are swollen with 400-500 people from their late teens to early 30's composed mostly of 20 somethings. This crowd looks like the people who would be walking a college campus.

I have went to meetings in the suburbs as well as the inner city. I have been to Black majority meetings and White majority meetings as well as every diverse meeting in between.

The main consistency of all of these people in AA are that they are friendliest people in the world. They sincerely want to help you! AA is 100% positive energy. One of the core principles of AA is helping fellow drunks. AA is refreshing from the shallow bar/party scene where people take advantage of one another and get in fights for dumb reasons. The people you will meet in AA are real friends who will go out of their way to help you. Since I lost my license for 90 days, many people in AA went out of their way to give me rides to meetings and other social functions in AA. And AA is definitely not all meetings. The Youth group down in DC regularly throws sober parties where everyone eats good cookout food and dances to music without getting drunk and throwing up, embarrassing themselves or getting into fights with drunk arseholes. There are also annual picnics, ski trips and camping trips sponsored by AA. And yes, there are a lot of pretty girls who go to the youth meetings. AA has proven to this alcoholic that I can still have a great social life filled with cool friends, pretty girls and still be the life of the party without throwing away my health, freedom and my life. AA has effectively replaced my lonely depressing drunk life of going to bars and risking my life behind the wheel for a much more natural, wholesome and spiritual based life.

Zebra1275

I had to get some medical help for a few days the last time I detoxed. The Dr. who treated me (who I really respected) told me he was in AA, one of the meetings he attended, and said if I went there I would probably see him. That changed my stereotypes.

jwolf

WOW, thanks so much for everyone's replies!! That does make me think differently about AA. I am thinking about attending a meeting tonight....still scared, but not as scary as waking up and the last thing you remember is pouring a glass of wine.....then your husband tells you all the stuff you did like watch a movie, talk about his promotion at work, ate dinner.....and you don't remember a THING!!!!!!

I know I have to go, so I am going to force myself....if not tonight, I will go tomorrow....

Mark75

Go tonight. Have a seat, relax and LISTEN. You don't have to be the center of attention. And if it moves you... introduce yourself, if not, maybe later.

aasharon90

Go with willingness and an openmind to
listen to the messages of hope. Listen to
the experiences that others have gone
thru before, during and after their drinking
careers.

I use to be afraid too, but in order for
me to stay sober I need to go to any
lengths I needed to to stay sober.

No one expected me to know it all
about recovery because I was the
newcomer.

I use to be affaid if I went someone
would recognize me, but, Ive learned
that I want to see someone I know
and someones who knows me because
we have something to share in common.
Then I didnt have to feel alone in my
recovery.

I went. I listened. I absorbed. And I kept
going till i didnt have to, but wanted to.

Recovery is a journey of a life time learning
to live a happy healthy life without addiction.

Be honest in all you do and you will eventually
know what Happiness Joy and FREE means
in recovery.

dorito281211

Wow, this sounded JUST like me. My wife is always telling me things I did and said but I have zero recollection of it!
I'm 24 days sober and really liking being able to remember things and not waking up feeling like crap.

Itchy

At my home group we have a cop who comes in uniform some of the time, gun and all. I was also not liking the possibility that they would do some kind of try to "save" me rigamarole.

Now here is the part some folks might take exception to but I am going to say it all the same. Pick your AA meetings like you would pick your yard sales or areas you would buy a home whether you can afford one now or not. Odds are that you will run into folks from all over but usually the middle class areas will have them, upper middle class them, blue collar neighborhoods them. The funny thing is that once you have a handle on AA you will likely not hesitate to go to any meeting anywhere.

My home group meets in a church, and no church people are there that I know of. It is a small group and all dress as I do, middle class to upper, and are the nicest folks you ever want to meet.

Just don't pick a place that might have the other effect. Intimidate you by perhaps seeing the mayor there, or some cops attending, for your first time. It is a learning experience and I think we all laugh at ourselves later. I still do.

2granddaughters

Take a buck to throw in the pot.

"What to expect at AA meetings..."

Expect your life to begin to change forever, because it will.

All the best.

Bob R.

jwolf

I DID IT!!!! Went to my first AA meeting!!! Thank you to all who encouraged me to go. Turns out a friend of mine at work goes and I went with her. It was so refreshing for me and I am starting to thing that maybe I CAN do this....maybe I CAN not drink....Got my first chip tonight, the 24 hr white one ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!!

flutter

If you're convinced that AA is the path you'd like to explore, please try more than one meeting. As I was typing this I just read that you already went! Glad it was a good experience! I went to a few different meetings, and they sure were different from each other, so hopefully the one you went to felt right to you, but if not, know that they're all really different from each other, at least I found that in my experience.

Sapling

That's awesome....I left my first meeting with Hope....No other way to describe it. Jump into it...You might even ask your friend if she knows a possible candidate for a sponsor. Good for you.

Itchy

Yay jwolf.
The hope comes from you, the meeting just let you know that you are not alone, and others have made it and are there for you. Just like we are here for you too. Both helped me get sober.

2granddaughters

Great !! your life's starting to change already ......

Keep coming back. The meetings are where the magic happens for me.

All the best.

Bob R