isabella1bella

It's a question I've been asking myself alot especially with the emotional rollercoaster I've been on this week. How long before I feel Normal? At the moment I feel good/bad/raged/psychotic/obsessed/calm/happy/upset ... the list goes on and varies from day to day.

I know everyone's journey into recovery is different and to be honest everyone's opinion I respect and value from fears about alcohol contents in food/medication to fear of nightmares/sleep and day to day living.

I just wonder is there a pattern or a respectable amount of time before you can EXPECT to feel you again? I can't really remember being ME as it was over 10 years ago but I'm hoping feelings that may have once been familiar strike a chord with me sooner rather than later.

Can some1, any1 shine a light on this?

Sapling

I'm an alcoholic and I want what I want...And I want it now!....Had to put a little work in on myself for this one. I had to give time a little time. It gets better every day.

Dee74

everyones' normal is different tho, thats the thing

for me it took me at least three months to feel a consistency and a reliability of emotions & responses in me, and then longer than that again to trust what I was feeling was normal.

Other people seem to reach that point in a shorter timeframe

D

Rusty Zipper

isy, i never really knew me,

so i just went with the flow, didn't fight it,

and know i'm found

all good wishes

Innerchild

Hey, being "normal" is boring. There isnt such thing as being normal we all have positive charatacteristis about ourselves and some that we would like to change. I like being weird at times and I also like to surround myself around people who are different. Its best we focus on our good qualities and try change the things about ourselves we dont like. Dont beat yourself up.

Jomey

like Rusty, I never knew me....the alcoholic "me" was there long before I started drinking...I was manipulated by a crazy family when I was a child, married young, started a family without ever really knowing who I was....the sober "me", if I do say so myself, is a woman I really like....and she grew out of nothing I recognize from the past...

like Dee, I would say it took about 3 or 4 months to start to feel "normal" in the sense that I was taking behavior cues from what "looked" normal to me, and I started feeling similiar responses in a couple of months.

Relax....it's a learning process....be good to yourself....and let yourself heal.

Best wishes!

BackToSquareOne

My perspective is that life is all about change, I doubt that any of us can go back to who we were 10 years ago. The emotional roller coaster of alcohol/drug withdrawal will subside with time, things will smooth out and life will go on. I believe that most of the bad stuff is born out of the fear based emotions, conquor those and the rest is easy.

RyanRed

Professionals say about 3 months for the brain to reset itself. At least thats what I read somewhere anyways.

It all really depends on how much abuse you did to yourself really. Some people snap right back, and others it may take months to years.

I'm finding out the whole quitting drinking was the easy part. The real challenges in sobriety are things like learning to relive again, how to deal with stress, how to feel like things are fun without alcohol, how to relax, how to be social etc etc. Its those things that will put you on an emotional roller coaster. Alcohol was the cure all medicine that masked our daily lives. Were basically learning how to walk all over again.

Im 9 months sober in 5 days, and I'm still in the process of feeling "normal" But the thing is Isbella, whats normal? Being stress free most of the time, and having a smile on your face with a feeling of inner peace? It sure sounds nice, but it isnt reality. Not even for non alcoholics. The reality is we as alcoholics will be learning how to live and stay sober for the rest of our lives. We get better at it with time and experience i assure you It also becomes easier as we move forward. so dont worry.

So try not to look at this with a time frame, but rather as a guarantee self renewal. You will feel better! When? Well I guess that all depends on your own minds psychology. Some get it spirituality, while others though verbal communication like myself. Me writing this right now is my personal therapy. See, your helping me and didnt even know it

Stay strong, stick with it, and the world will change right before your very eyes!

-Ryan

onlythetruth

For me, the roller-coaster mood swings you describe were at their worst for the first 2 months or so, then gradually faded. I think they were pretty much gone by 4 months.

Still had some things to deal with before I felt comfortable with myself, though.

Hang in there. It's a process, and you're doing just fine.

langkah

When living sober becomes the norm for you, then you'll feel normal doing that.

Anna

I know it's hard to be patient, but it will get better for you.

I think it was a few months before I felt more normal.

Try to remember that the emotions you're feeling are just emotions. They are not you. You can recognize them and let them go.

1undone

I'm not patient either but what Ryan had to say rings true for me. Not drinking is the easy part it's not continuing not to drink over everyday **** and just fun that is hard for me. I look at it in the same way that people see maintaining a weight after losing a lot. Losing it (believe it or not) is the easy part, it's maintaining it that is hard.

This is a process for us or rather a journey because at least for me, what the heck is normal? I'm finding that I'm not the social crazy girl I thought I was and that I like quiet. I don't like noise. I have a feeling that is one of the reasons why I drank. I like peace that's all there is to it. I'd love to live in a cabin by a river in the woods but be able to drive two miles to civilization to pick whatever I need. LOL But the cabin would have to be high end. LOLOLOLOL

Anywho life isn't perfect so I'm trying so very hard to be patient. Lately it's a minute by minute thing for me. I hope you will be patient. But I get it.

doggonecarl

I don't know how to gauge what "normal" feels like. But I don't feel like drinking, so I'll take that.

jocata

I'm almost at two months and still struggling with my emotions. Like everyone has said, I was numb for so many years. I am learning how to feel stuff again.

I want to feel good all the time, that's why i took drugs and drank. I felt like I had a right to always feel good.

Now that I'm sober, I REALLY want to feel good all the time, but I'm learning that's not reality. I have to learn to function even when I don't feel good. This is a hard one for me.
It is slowly getting better over time though.

Don't give up bella, you'll get there.

God bless.

sugarbear1

Rehab suggested one month for every year of using. I have about 35 months (take 8 away).

Give yourself a year, maybe 6 months. I change daily.

SSIL75

With the obvious disclosures about there being no normal blah blah I think I started to feel normal when I was living a normal life. That started within days and stabilized a few months in.

So getting up, feeling good, day no longer revolving around alcohol etc. A nice steady pace to my life. That felt (feels) normal.

isabella1bella

thanks everyone ... im impatient at the best of times so now ive decided to be sober i want it all to feel right asap

Lily

For me (I am one who has relapsed in the past) It has been different amounts of time. As long as I do not switch addictions (food has been mine) my normalcy has been shorter. For me when I am eating good foods, taking vitamins, exercising, etc. My body has adapted in as little as 2 months and my emotions have evened out.

When I lost my first husband to brain cancer in 2001 I can remember I had 2 1/2 months and I was so thankful for the clean time I had with him and that I was present when he died. (I had relapsed w/ his pain meds the summer before he died and I remember watching Sandra Bullock in 28 days jolting me back into recovery)

Each day you should feel a little bit better, but if you moods slip back a couple of days, that too is normal. Hang in there!

Lily