Cardinalfan

so sad I failed again. I am back today....today I will not drink.
The urge to numb the enormous pain I have from loosing my beautiful son 3 weeks ago was too much for me to handle. I want to be sober so bad. Things will get better when I get there for good. Ive been to my doctor, a psychiatrist, and a therapist, and everyone just wants me to take drugs, oh and the wise doctor's said "and quit drinking " OH geez, why didn't I think of that?????? easier said than done. This forum has been a bigger help to me than anyone knows. When I get sober maybe I'll wake up from this horible nightmare....
Day 1 here I go.

2granddaughters

Do you go to AA ? My recovery started in a Recovery Home. I needed the "intensive care" I got there in the beginning. I needed the company of others who were in the same boat as me.
Prayers to you and your family.

Bob R.

Anna

I'm so very sorry about the loss of your son. I can only imagine the pain you must feel.

However, you can honor your son's memory by staying sober and living the best life you can.

Prayers for you and your family.

Dee74

Have you tried grief counselling, Cardinalfan?

D

Hevyn

So glad to see you are trying again Cardinalfan. My heart goes out to you for the loss you've suffered. Drinking doesn't help anything, as you already know. I relied on it to calm me down so many times - it just masks our feelings temporarily, and we don't move forward as long as we stay numb.

I think the idea of grief counseling is great. I hope you will begin to feel some relief from your pain. We're here to listen and help.

Shining~Again

I am soo sorry for your loss. So very sorry. I've posted before to you and don't know
what more to say than please continue to reach out to those you feel comfortable in talking to. Don't isolate any more than you may need to. It's devastating to lose a child, a parent, a beloved. Grief brings a slew of emotions that no one can predict.
Am glad to see you post again.
((((big hugs))))

Cardinalfan

I'm starting grief counselling next week. Reading about loosing a child, and spending time with my 2 yr old grandson. His hugs and kisses are magic. I am blessed with a good support system in my friends. (family all lives in Canada, so they are gone home now and l live by myself) Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts and prayers. Peace to you all.

LoftyIdeals

Prayers for you, cardinalfan, in your grief, and for your sobriety. God bless.

Bikeguy

I'm sorry for your loss and wish you peace and serenity.

Tigger41

Cardinalfan - I'm am so deeply sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you're going through. My thoughts and prayer go out to you and your family during this time. ((hugs))

jocata

So sorry for your loss, Cardinalfan. Can't imagine how hard it must be. You have strength in numbers here.

God bless you.

artsoul

I feel so bad for you, Cardinalfan.... I saw a friend of mine go through the same thing and it's just heartbreaking. I hope you are surrounded by loving friends and family. Maybe the grief counselor will know of a support group.......

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

1undone

Very sorry you are experiencing a parents worst nightmare. . You will get through the drinking and sort it out. I'm glad you will start grief counseling. Keep kissing and hugging your grandson. Yet a good reason to stay sober!

debsam

So so sorry for your loss Cardinal. I will say a little prayer for you.

Please keep posting. We're all here to help you back up.

Sending you a heartfelt hug from Canada.

TatsX

Hi Cardinalfan, I have posted before to your story, maybe you remember. Once again I post, it takes time. 18 years since my 16 year old brother killed himself. Still can't listen to some of his favorite songs, cry on his birthday and the date he died. I can't forget the phone call after all these years, but it will get easier. My thoughts are with you.