Is ambivalence addiction
lillyknitting
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Loughton, Essex, England
Posts: 638
Is ambivalence addiction
Need some help and advice. Just received the RR book, so far so good, totally relate to his thoughts and experiences In the beginning with regard to AA. I am not here to knock AA I know many people who it has helped and good for them, but for me, it didn't work. My drinking is a lot better, I can do weeks of abstinence then suddenly it comes upon me, "yes, I could fancy a couple of wines" just as described the beast talking but I still find I cannot quit completely, is this ambivalence addiction and do I have to put into place extra effort and extreme willpower, need some advice, but will not stop trying.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
My advice:
Finish reading the book in the next couple of days and read through all of the AVRT threads. Then, read the book once more, paying close attention to the exercises. To answer your first question, though, if you want to quit but find it difficult to do so, you are probably addicted.
Finish reading the book in the next couple of days and read through all of the AVRT threads. Then, read the book once more, paying close attention to the exercises. To answer your first question, though, if you want to quit but find it difficult to do so, you are probably addicted.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,882
Ambivalence for me means that I haven't fully decided that I want to quit drugging. Its like on one hand I want to stop and on the other I don't want to stop.
Here's a recovery tool that can help you get past ambivalence: COST/BENEFIT ANALYSIS, Four Questions About My Addiction
Here's a recovery tool that can help you get past ambivalence: COST/BENEFIT ANALYSIS, Four Questions About My Addiction
I loved the cost benefit analysis. I always knew the costs were much greater, but it was the first place I ever got to express the idea that my drugs did something I liked. And so it was the real starting point in untangling my brain and trying to figure out how to stop. It feels like I quit a million times, before I really quit. This process would have gone on much longer I think if I hadn't been able to simply acknowledge that the reason I kept doing drugs was that I liked some of the results. Just repeating to myself that drugs were bad was ineffective because it wasn't true and it didn't address the reasons I liked them.
I experienced the same thing. Out of the blue, it seemed, I would allow myself a couple of drinks and the whole cycle would start again. Based on everything I've read and actually lived, this is addiction.
The SMART articles helped me a lot. Watching my thoughts made me realize that it's not so out of the blue. There were these patterns of automatic thoughts and behaviors which would override any reason when the thought of "just one" came up. That's where I had to focus my effort.
For me, the most helpful was to change my routines and be extra watchful of my thoughts. But I had stop struggling and accept the addiction first.
The SMART articles helped me a lot. Watching my thoughts made me realize that it's not so out of the blue. There were these patterns of automatic thoughts and behaviors which would override any reason when the thought of "just one" came up. That's where I had to focus my effort.
For me, the most helpful was to change my routines and be extra watchful of my thoughts. But I had stop struggling and accept the addiction first.
Need some help and advice. Just received the RR book, so far so good, totally relate to his thoughts and experiences In the beginning with regard to AA. I am not here to knock AA I know many people who it has helped and good for them, but for me, it didn't work. My drinking is a lot better, I can do weeks of abstinence then suddenly it comes upon me, "yes, I could fancy a couple of wines" just as described the beast talking but I still find I cannot quit completely, is this ambivalence addiction and do I have to put into place extra effort and extreme willpower, need some advice, but will not stop trying.
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