aeo1313

Today I have taken no hydrocodone, but I want to. I kept telling myself I am choosing to take them and I can choose not to, but I am finding that not quite as easy as I thought. My chest is tight, and I am anxious. I am used to taking them after work to relax. I guess I didn't realize that choosing not to would be difficult. If I knew I could easily get another rx not sure I even would have seen a therapist about it, just kept on popping them.

Anna

So, it sounds like you're not sure if you're going to stop taking the pills or not? If you do, you will find lots of support here.

aeo1313

I want to quit the pills. No one even knows I've been taking them except my therapist and my husband knows a little bit. I don't take much per day, but enough that I really want one right now. Since I only drink on the weekend i know the next 3 days will be hard as well. I am going to yoga tonight which will help both my mind and get me out of the house.

I just keep thinking, just take one, who cares, no one knows you do anyway so it's obviously not affecting your life any. I know that is the same voice that years ago told me to binge/purge and starve my way into hospitalization. I hate that voice

Threshold

Yup, same voice...it's told me the same things too and a bunch of other nonsense. You've figured it out, and recognize it even when it tries to camaflague.

YOU will know if you take just one, and YOU are the most important one here, because only YOU can decide to get clean, live clean and build a better way for yourself.

Candi25

All of us here have those evil devilish voices.A In fact, my husband was stressed and venting to me tonight but i could feel anger in his voice and i hopped up, opened the window really fast(even tho its like 20 out) and said i opened the window to sweep all the negativity and evil spirits that were not invited and i want them outta this house!! Here is a poem that helps me:
The Man In The Mirror

If you get what you want in your struggle for self
And the world makes you king for a day
Then go to the mirror and look at yourself
And see what that man has to say

For it isn't a man's father, mother or wife
Whose judgement upon him must pass
The fellow whose verdict counts most in his life
Is the man staring back from the glass

He's the fellow to please, never mind the rest
For he's with you clear up to the end
And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the man in the glass is your friend

You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years
And get pats on the back as you pass
But your final reward wil be heartache and tears
If you've cheated the man in the glass