CamilleBelle

Hate to be such a downer... I usually am a very happy gal!! I've decided stress is my trigger... and I am under a lot of it right now! I'm on like 2 hours of sleep and this roller coaster of emotions is insane and I am just hoping to get through the day. All I want to do is sleep. Is this normal without alcohol? I'm tempted to go buy some just to get some stuff done!! I have lots of energy with a few drinks in! Maybe now was not the best time to make such a big change... (big dumb addiction kicking in...) I may cave today my friends. And I apologize in advance and this is NO excuse for anyone else to do the same!!!! I needed to post... I cant wait for the day where I am the one saying "you can do it!" Cause right now... I cant!

PaperDolls

There is never a perfect time to quit. Don't use the stress as an excuse.

It is possible to get through anything sober. Even things like the death of a loved one or a debilitating disease.

Consider making a gratitude list instead of thinking of what a stressful day it is.

FT

CamilleBelle,

Stress is a b!tch. Seriously. Holidays produce it big time.

I just posted on another forum about my Christmas 2010, when I was in withdrawal from a 2 year oxycodone addiction. Christmas last year was total misery for me. I quit oxys on December 15, so on Christmas eve and Christmas day, I was in total withdrawal hell.

How the hell do you get through the holidays feeling like that? For me, I had finally made the commitment that I was no longer an opiate user. I was already a non-drinker for over 20 years, and I had to apply the same strategy to opiates that I had done with alcohol so many years before.

The decision to be a non-drinker, a non-opiate user, is life changing when those things have controlled your life for a long time. The decision to quit is a voluntary removal of your survival skills, at least for the time being.

If you have made that decision, it has to be irreversible. You assume your new identity as a non-drinker, non-opiate user, no matter what. You begin to live your life as a non-substance-abuser, and all decisions are made within that paradigm.

You feel sick, yes. You feel desperate, yes. You feel scared and panicked because your tools are gone, yes. But you do it. If you have made the decision, you do it.

I can tell you one thing. The misery I suffered last Christmas has produced the best gift in the world for me and my family this year. I am clean and sober. What a gift to me and to them.

Hang in there. This Christmas may be miserable for you, but I'm here to tell you it is worth every miserable moment to have the glorious Christmases to come.

FT

Threshold

Ok, I am here as your friend to slap you in the face! SMACK! This is NO time to panic. Sure moving is a big huge old hassle, done it at least 16 times myself. But you are not going to drink.

Stop struggling. Tell yourself you are not going to drink, because you are NOT. And just dig in and do the next thing that needs doing, then the next, etc.

You do not need booze to get stuff done, just a hug and some encouragement! (((((HUG)))))) You can do it Camillebelle, I am so proud of what you've done so far!

and you know what? It may FEEL like you can't do it, but stop, take a breath and realize that you already ARE doing it!
You ARE!

Love you...

Don't struggle, just remind yourself that you don't drink anymore, and move on. When you look back on this move, and see that you did it sober, you are going to feel so empowered.

neferkamichael

I have learned to enjoy suffering through the temptation. Im 1 year 5 months and 10 days sober, 99 days off crack. Somethings are better, but the temptation to use is irratating, annoying, and miserable. One of my AA friends told me when I get the temptation to use to play the tape all the way through. By that he meant yea you're goona enjoy the high for a few hours and then back to being broke and miserable. Merry Christmas

Eliasson

You don't have to drink over ANYTHING! I tell you this as a woman with a debilitating autoimmune disease and as a mom with a young son with brain cancer. Do you have any support besides SR? Go to meetings? I know how tempting it can be when you are under a tremendous amount of stress. I promise there is nothing that adding a little alcohol won't make worse, not better. Keep reading and posting, take a hot bath, get a massage, go for a walk, anything. The cravings will pass! You are not alone in this and you can get thru this without picking up!

Peter G

OK Camille, you seem to have talked yourself into a drink. Go for it. Have one and chill a bit. Forget the stress and crawl inside a bottle once again. You have my approval. Just do me one huge favor, can? Wait until tomorrow.

So let's recap. You are going to drink. Awesome. Now, picture in your mind the store you'll get the bottle from (or shelf, as it were). Picture in your mind the clothes you'll wear, the jacket you'll put on, the car keys in your hand as you're walking out the door. Now just tell yourself the following: "The decision is made. I'm getting booze and drinking it. Tomorrow."

In the meantime, have a bath, watch a movie, go to a meeting, re-read your posts here, do everything you've been doing to remain sober, knowing full well that tomorrow you are all set up to drink and there's no argument to be had.

When tomorrow comes, you may or may not drink. Personally, I've never come to that tomorrow because oddly enough, I get past the stress that has me craving, and I always come to see how temporary those current problems really are.

If you're going to drink, put some space between you and it and watch how your higher power steps in. And if you're not yet with the whole "higher power" thing, at least today is off the table. As they say, the calm mind usually prevails.

doggonecarl

If you think you will drink, drink you will.

"...im DONE DONE DONE"

Your words, just the other day. Done means done! Stay strong.

CamilleBelle

I'm not a daytime drinker either, so this is a new feeling for me. I thought about taking a xanax, but those give me worse "hangovers" then booze so resisted. feeling better already. I took a shower, blew dried, got dressed. Movers have this under control. It's okay! Funny how fast your mind can freak you out! I'll prob be back here in an hour negative again! :rotfxko Lets hope not! Thanks for all your help, it's invaluable, really!

CamilleBelle

No booze either... Forgot to mention that.

Itchy

Camille I am so impressed! I thought you were really gonna cave there. Now you know. Even folks who never had anxiety or were irritable report those feelings in the first month or three. Most of us go through those overwhelming feelings. As you see you survive them. Keep surviving.

Zebra1275

Stress is a part of life, it will be with you until the day you die. What you need is to develop methods to cope with stress.

Have you thought about AA? The Big Book describes AA as a design for living, it's more than just not drinking.

SoCalDude

See my thread last week about my first try of prescription medication.. what a whirlwind it took me on, on the FIRST TRY... Yikes! I realized then, I personally can't do any of it, I have to do this on my own.

I'm no doctor though, so just my own experience.

Threshold

I had no doubt that if you gave it just a wee bit of thought, you'd not drink!

You go girl!

Dee74

I'm glad you got through that without meds or booze.

Stress sucks for sure - it's uncomfortable and it makes us crazy - but we can get through it. sober

D