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Old 12-19-2011, 01:29 PM
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Here we go..

Hi everyone.
This is my first time being here and essentially the first time acknowledging I have a problem and I really don't know what to say to be honest. I think I've gone from heavy drinker to simply drinking because it makes me feel normal, not just drunk. When I stop drinking for a day my mind feels blank, I've started to get the shakes, and sometimes wake-up in my own cold sweat. Not to mention the racing random thoughts during the night when I don't have my drinks.

My university studies are a huge pressure and that causes me to drink even more and it is becoming harder to focus on schoolwork when all I can think about is when I can drink later. Is that normal with alcohol addiction? I know I'm addicted but I just feel so hopeless; almost all of my aunts and uncles (and my father) are very heavy drinkers and/or alcoholics, however they are extremely gentle people and not abusive or angry in any form.

It is starting to get scary to think about not drinking because it feels like if I don't I'll go insane since I'm already prone to anxiety. Anyway I guess I've just felt so alone because my girlfriend that I live with doesn't drink so its very hard to relate to her or talk to her about my problems and I've been just dying to talk to other people like me. Sometimes we don't realize how lonely the world is even when there are people all around. Thank you everyone and have a Merry Christmas.
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Old 12-19-2011, 01:41 PM
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Those symptoms of alcohol poisoning and withdraw 'do not' get easier with age if you continue to drink. An Uncle and two Cousins of mine have died of liver failure over the years, but somehow I kept the attitude "Can't happen to me" People can (and do) quit drinking at all ages (I'm 40), having a non-drinker GF can be a plus, although it all comes down to you, you are the one that has to make the decision and stick with it. I'm nearing three months and only get a few cravings a week now, but feeling much, much better.
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Old 12-19-2011, 05:54 PM
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Welcome lalonder!

Admitting our problem and reaching out for help is really hard. We've all been there, though, so you're not alone.

It is starting to get scary to think about not drinking because it feels like if I don't I'll go insane since I'm already prone to anxiety.
I think most all of us had that fear and about a dozen others ("I'll never have fun again," "I won't be able to socialize," etc. etc.)

Ironically, alcohol creates a lot of anxiety and depression, not to mention the constant obsession. It takes a bit of time to get used to, but being sober is SO much better. Keep posting and reading!
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Old 12-19-2011, 06:00 PM
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Welcome! Time to see your doctor to help you deal with you addiction. They are great about it. When you are ready go talk to him/her and of course post away here as we certainly can relate to what's going on with you.

Hang in there because you have done a great thing for yourself by posting here!
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Old 12-19-2011, 06:04 PM
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Alcohol made me so depressed and anxious it was horrible. My depression and anxiety are more manageble these dayss.

Welcome to the family.
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Old 12-19-2011, 06:57 PM
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[QUOTE=lalonder;3211026]Hi everyone.
This is my first time being here and essentially the first time acknowledging I have a problem and I really don't know what to say to be honest.QUOTE]

I think that being honest with yourself is the most important thing. Opening up to people who you trust, whether they are alcoholic or not, can also be very helpful.

When I got sober, I was just so worn out, afraid and miserable, that I just told everybody who seemed remotely concerned with my well-being. I told my family, friends, my boss, coworkers, classmates. I didn't talk their ear off about it. I told them what I had told myself, "I'm an alcoholic. I have absolutely no control over my drinking. If I take another drink, it will kill me, sooner or later."

By opening up to these people, two purposes were served:

1. I found out that a lot of people were very understanding and compassionate. A lot of people were willing to help me.

2. It helped me reiterate to myself my condition. I was repeatedly being honest with myself, thereby taking something that I may have blown off as some "crazy idea" and turning it into a truth. Now that truth about myself always exists in the back of my mind, and it's just another tool in living a sober life.

Peace!
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Old 12-19-2011, 07:17 PM
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Welcome lalonder.
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Old 12-19-2011, 07:48 PM
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You are still very young and by tackling this problem now it will change your life. I am 48 have always enjoyed a drink but for the last 15 years it has become a habitual daily thing and one drink is never enough. It varies but is not good if I decide to buy vodka or something like that as a litre never lasts more than a few days and there is always a bottle of wine open. Not good.

Doctors can help and I have had several who have really helped with my ongoing depression. Trouble is I have always taken the view that now I was feeling better because of the meds why not just have a couple glasses of red wine. I think this has always undermined the effectiveness of the medication. My fault entirely.

I'm new to the forum but there seem to be some very good and kind people here so Im hoping to get things right this time.

I find daily walks along the coast help me.

Take care

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Old 12-19-2011, 07:58 PM
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I was where you are 6 months ago.

I won't say that it has always been easy but it is worth it...so much better.

Admit that you're powerless to control alcohol. Tell your girlfriend about it. To and see your doctor and tell them about it. Then stop drinking - first one day, then two, then three and in and on.

It's that simple.
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Old 12-19-2011, 07:59 PM
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Welcome Lalonder,
I totally understand where you are coming from. When my best friend suggested I had a drinking problem and should give up. I thought don't be crazy my life is hard enough as it is without adding to my problems by giving up drink. It is the only way I can cope, it is the only thing that makes me happy.
Over 6 months sober I can't believe how crazy I had got through the drinking. My attitude has changed 180 degrees.
I hope for your sake you decide that you do have a problem and the best way to deal with that problem is to stop drinking but only you can come to that realization. We are all here for you if you make that choice and will support you.

All the best
Merry Christmas

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