What Can I do, its done... Revamp
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NJ
Posts: 14
What Can I do, its done... Revamp
Last Night I drank an entire 750 ml a 5th of Jack D Honey Whiskey, am I insane? I feel like the biggest failure in the world... I was doing so good. What is wrong with me? I am stronger than this. I don't feel self pitty I did this to myself. I know I can beat this!! This forum is my truth serum, without it I'd hold all these feelings in and self destruct... I'm starting day 1 again because what else can I do... Hope everyone has a great weekend.
Member of SMART Recovery
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 1,722
No, you are not insane. I'm guessing you either hadn't decided you were truly done with drinking, or you didn't plan ahead for what you'd do if you wanted to drink. Possibly both.
In my view, the single most critical component to quitting an addiction is making the decision to quit, no matter what. This is true no matter what recovery approach you use. In SMART Recovery, this is Point One of the 4 point program. In AA they talk about being willing. AVRT's whole approach is based on making this decision and sticking to it.
Beyond that most of us find we need some sort of "emergency plan"....a plan for what we're going to do if the urge is really strong. There are all sorts of ways to approach this but they all involve one goal which is to first figure out WHEN you tend to have urges and then decide in advance what you're going to do about them. (It is a very bad idea to simply assume that you won't get urges: it's best to assume that you WILL).
I've shared this before, but when I quit drinking I had a very strong urge every day at the same time: late afternoon, which was when I was used to starting off my evening of drinking. It helped immeasurably when I realized this fact, and planned for it by always having something with me to eat at that time of day. If I ate something, it reduced the urge enough to make it manageable.
So, have you considered what happened here? Was it an urge that happened at a fairly predictable time of day or due to an event? Is there a way you can plan better for next time?
In my view, the single most critical component to quitting an addiction is making the decision to quit, no matter what. This is true no matter what recovery approach you use. In SMART Recovery, this is Point One of the 4 point program. In AA they talk about being willing. AVRT's whole approach is based on making this decision and sticking to it.
Beyond that most of us find we need some sort of "emergency plan"....a plan for what we're going to do if the urge is really strong. There are all sorts of ways to approach this but they all involve one goal which is to first figure out WHEN you tend to have urges and then decide in advance what you're going to do about them. (It is a very bad idea to simply assume that you won't get urges: it's best to assume that you WILL).
I've shared this before, but when I quit drinking I had a very strong urge every day at the same time: late afternoon, which was when I was used to starting off my evening of drinking. It helped immeasurably when I realized this fact, and planned for it by always having something with me to eat at that time of day. If I ate something, it reduced the urge enough to make it manageable.
So, have you considered what happened here? Was it an urge that happened at a fairly predictable time of day or due to an event? Is there a way you can plan better for next time?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 521
It wasn't until drinking had beat me down so much.. that I got to the point of true surrender that I understood what it meant to truly WANT to stop drinking. Before that point I only wanted to stop the consequences of my drinking and not the act of drinking. I wanted everyone to THINK I had stopped drinking. I wanted to pull the blanket over my on eyes and say "but I am trying so hard!!"... when in truth I wasn't doing $hit about my drinking.
I lost people, places and things... it wasn't until I lost all connection to the feeling of living because drinking had finally robbed me of everything that I truly reached a spiritual bottom... that I wanted to stop drinking for all the right reasons.
Good luck!
I lost people, places and things... it wasn't until I lost all connection to the feeling of living because drinking had finally robbed me of everything that I truly reached a spiritual bottom... that I wanted to stop drinking for all the right reasons.
Good luck!
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