cherrystreet

Hi, I have a question for all of you. My AH has been sober for over 3 years, and typically does not go to bars at all. My concern is about his job in sales and the "culture" that goes along with the profession he is in. They have a meeting today and then after are going out to a bar for the "Christmas Party" for 2 hours and then at 9 pm going to dinner. I read the text from his boss that said "John will be dancing around with a lampshade on his head" and other comments about getting wasted, pretty much. All the spouses are invited but I told him I'm not comfortable hanging out with people who are specifically going to get tanked for 2 hours before even going out for dinner. Now, that is me. I told him I'm not really comfortable him going ,but he is a grown man, he can do whatever he chooses. It is so hard because I want to support him and his work but I know that alcoholism is not something that you cure and that to stay sober you have to work at it. Every time his work "collegues" get together it involves drinking or taking clients out drinking. He says he is not concerned that he will drink. Its one thing if he goes but I cannot be a part of it. Is that wrong?

CagedBird

I think it's fine if you don't want to go. Perfectly understandable.

cslaurie

I feel for you-you don't want to see all of the progress he has made go down the tubes. I wouldn't go either-i'm also not into that kind of scene.

He has to know that he has to stay sober on his own, for himself...

The old me would have went just to amke sure he "stayed in line", but i want to get away from that kind of behavior.

akrasia

Yeah, even if there weren't a history of alcoholism that sounds like the lamest scene imaginable.

msbelle57

If he has been sober for 3 years he is doing something right...alcohol is everywhere..not just with work mates. Believe in him and support him saying he is in control. Best to you both!!

Cyranoak

Go if you want to go. Don't go if you don't want to go. That's it.

Cyranoak