1undone

I still find the whole idea that I'm an alcoholic unbelieveable. Even sad. I've been facing this since last May and it still feels so odd.

Well I ended my sponsorship with one lady and just asked another lady who is much similar in temperament to me and also a better listener. She doesn't seem to be what I like to call a professional AAer she's not going to talk my ears off about **** I'm not ready for and quite frankly her own personal problems! And I don't think she'll tell me "to suck it up." when I'm legitimately having a hard day.

The holidays are really more difficult than I had hoped they would be. Not sure what else there really is to say about that but it is what it is. My husband is a big deterrent to my drinking and thankfully he won't be traveling anymore this year. Well whats left of this year!

I guess I'm just checking in. I'm so happy to have all of the SoberRecovery peeps in my corner!

Ranger

Always rooting for you, 1. Way to keep fighting...no doubt the grit and honesty you show here on SR is inspiring in ways you'll never know.

Tigger41

1undone - still hard for me to believe I'm an alcoholic as well. I keep trying to think back over the past 6 years to figure out when it happened and when I could have stopped it.

Hang in there - I'm hoping the holidays will be a mix of difficult and wonderful.

SadRN

Yep, it absolutley SUCKS when you have that "No doubt about it, can't rationalize it anymore, no denying it- I'm an alcoholic" moment. But I'm concentrating on the "Yep, I used to drink too much, but I'm MUCH stronger than that, and I'm sober now." Much more fun, plus ya get to talk to all of the nice peeps on here,lol. Hugs to you.

Gerbosko

Sometimes I feel that way also. It's hard to grasp that it's actually you - It's always easier to point at someone and tell what's wrong with them. When I first quit my brain played that game a lot with me and I had to fight it some nights.. It's weird how addictions work.

We're happy to have you here .

eJoshua

I'm glad to hear that you were able to find a beter sponsor.

1undone

Thanks all! Things seem to be humming along now with my me sponsor so I'm feeling hopeful. I'm alMost done reading "Lit" too; very good book!