Hi I am new with 33 hours and Counting. How did I get here?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 23
Hi I am new with 33 hours and Counting. How did I get here?
I am not sure if I am in the right Thread but, here it goes. 2 months ago I decided to wholeheartedly Stop drinking and I now realize that I am physically addicted. I have gone a little farther in my addiction then I thought I could go and my epiphany is I am now stuck on a ride that I cant get off of. Not with out help.
4 weeks ago on a bender and out of pure desperation I called the Police on my self. In my frustration after an entire day spent making about 20 (actually 14) phone calls to various recovery programs, counseling facilities and so on I got a lot of answering machines and a lot of "with no Insurance we cant help you" and a lot of "Ma'am" your going to need to go to the hospital.
My highest low point came when I called the Hospital and I simply asked the Operator if she could transfer me to the or "A" addiction abuse center or put me in touch with some sort of outpatient resources. She transferred me 5 times and I spoke with 5 people who still did not understand the question.
Your Kidding right?
My bright idea in a wasted state of mind became even brighter. That and being in public safety the quickest way to get into the system was to "Get into the system" Jail is a good place to start? I finished a 750 ml bottle of Vodka and put my shoes on an dried my eyes. 8 mins later (I live in a small town) a Supervising officer and his rookie arrived. I begged them to take me and they would not..."FOR WHAT" . I expanded that I am a danger to myself. after an hour with the nice gentleman and a few jokes. They told me to Dry out and come down and fill out a application for a dispatch position. Funny???
I am unemployed have have been for almost a year. I cried and cried and cried and then just passed out after the guys left.
My story continues.
A week later after a few returned phone calls a couple of badly ended AA meetings and a fist fight and a foot race to "DRY OUT"
I had another BAD DAY!
I called 911 to have a Medical BLS unit sent to me for transport to a hospital. A Bad Day of heart palpitations, shakes and audio hallucinations..giving IN and drinking. Off I went to the Hospital..surely someone will help if I am in the Hospital. 8 hours later with the nice non slip socks and a pretty bracelet I, was discharged by a nice handsome Dr. that explained that an addiction counselor will be coming in before you go and meet with you to help you with services. HALLELUJAH!
The Ball is now rolling for me in a good direction and in 4-6 weeks I will hopefully be doing a "Detox Program" I realize that this forum cant provide me medical but, rather support. I want the support and to be with other people that "Get my Disease".
I am a "I can do it all by myself" stay at home cheap Vodka girl and I am trying. I have not drank today and I am starting to not feel well. I hope that this will be a good platform for sobriety and today will not be easy but maybe less hard? Why all the alone isolation? I am new to the area and most of my friends are not close, married and busy with their lives.
Thanks for your time
4 weeks ago on a bender and out of pure desperation I called the Police on my self. In my frustration after an entire day spent making about 20 (actually 14) phone calls to various recovery programs, counseling facilities and so on I got a lot of answering machines and a lot of "with no Insurance we cant help you" and a lot of "Ma'am" your going to need to go to the hospital.
My highest low point came when I called the Hospital and I simply asked the Operator if she could transfer me to the or "A" addiction abuse center or put me in touch with some sort of outpatient resources. She transferred me 5 times and I spoke with 5 people who still did not understand the question.
Your Kidding right?
My bright idea in a wasted state of mind became even brighter. That and being in public safety the quickest way to get into the system was to "Get into the system" Jail is a good place to start? I finished a 750 ml bottle of Vodka and put my shoes on an dried my eyes. 8 mins later (I live in a small town) a Supervising officer and his rookie arrived. I begged them to take me and they would not..."FOR WHAT" . I expanded that I am a danger to myself. after an hour with the nice gentleman and a few jokes. They told me to Dry out and come down and fill out a application for a dispatch position. Funny???
I am unemployed have have been for almost a year. I cried and cried and cried and then just passed out after the guys left.
My story continues.
A week later after a few returned phone calls a couple of badly ended AA meetings and a fist fight and a foot race to "DRY OUT"
I had another BAD DAY!
I called 911 to have a Medical BLS unit sent to me for transport to a hospital. A Bad Day of heart palpitations, shakes and audio hallucinations..giving IN and drinking. Off I went to the Hospital..surely someone will help if I am in the Hospital. 8 hours later with the nice non slip socks and a pretty bracelet I, was discharged by a nice handsome Dr. that explained that an addiction counselor will be coming in before you go and meet with you to help you with services. HALLELUJAH!
The Ball is now rolling for me in a good direction and in 4-6 weeks I will hopefully be doing a "Detox Program" I realize that this forum cant provide me medical but, rather support. I want the support and to be with other people that "Get my Disease".
I am a "I can do it all by myself" stay at home cheap Vodka girl and I am trying. I have not drank today and I am starting to not feel well. I hope that this will be a good platform for sobriety and today will not be easy but maybe less hard? Why all the alone isolation? I am new to the area and most of my friends are not close, married and busy with their lives.
Thanks for your time
You Have To Do It For Yourself
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 29
Dear SVSHE
The second line of your post is the most important. I'm not sure if this is medical advice or not but comes from experience. I used to have the same attitude as you that "I can do it myself without any help". I realize now that I was wrong. Your dedication to getting help shows just how much you want to leave this terrible life and disease behind. Please don't let these obstacles deter you from your goal. I'm not familiar with the process of getting help with your addiction goes in the U.S. because here in Canada you would never have been turned away from a hospital with what you have described.
Please don't give up. The reward down the road for sobriety is to have control of your life back and being happy again. I have been clean and sober for 8 year's now and I admire you. Best of Luck
The second line of your post is the most important. I'm not sure if this is medical advice or not but comes from experience. I used to have the same attitude as you that "I can do it myself without any help". I realize now that I was wrong. Your dedication to getting help shows just how much you want to leave this terrible life and disease behind. Please don't let these obstacles deter you from your goal. I'm not familiar with the process of getting help with your addiction goes in the U.S. because here in Canada you would never have been turned away from a hospital with what you have described.
Please don't give up. The reward down the road for sobriety is to have control of your life back and being happy again. I have been clean and sober for 8 year's now and I admire you. Best of Luck
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