fooling myself
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: missouri
Posts: 22
fooling myself
hi guys many of u dont know me i just joined a few weeks ago and i was so into my recovery!!! unfortuntunately, i have fallen off the wagon. i havent gone on a binge but i have been having a few drinks here and there. and by a few drinks i mean at least 2 litters of wine a night. i am devastated bc i know it wont be long b4 i am falling down drunk somewhere making an ass out of myself!!! i dont know what to do??????? what is it gonna take???? please help!!!!!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,279
Hi Lor, I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling... I know its tough. Can you share more about the recovery you were so into & what actions you were taking so I can get an idea of where you are at.
I tried every possible way to somehow keep the drinking going by making changes & therefore justifying my ongoing right to drink with disastrous results. In the end there was only one thing I could do & that was to admit I was powerless over alcohol & that I could never drink again... PERIOD!
As hard as that is/was to handle at first it was also a major relief. Drinking & all of the negative effects that go with it are a lot of work, put some of that same effort into not picking up that first drink & make some positive changes in your life and thoughts that support your sobriety & you will start to see the beginnings of a new sober life & recovery.
Where do you think you are going wrong? For me it was always thinking that I could somehow handle a couple of drinks.. Ha.. I never wanted a couple... I wanted all I could get.
Stay connected here on SR, keep reading & posting and make a committed effort to make changes in your life & you will find that your sobriety dates start to get longer & better.
YOU can do this but YOU have to do it! There are no magic bullets that I know of, some find the program of AA & other programs help them along their path to recovery. Others seem to work on their addiction themselves and others focus on reading posting sharing & helping here on SR is just right for them. There are many recovered alcoholics that have done all three to beat this thing (and more). Stretch yourself into your program & sobriety and you will find what works for you. Its worth the effort I promise you that.
All of the best in your recovery.
Sincerely ~ NB
I tried every possible way to somehow keep the drinking going by making changes & therefore justifying my ongoing right to drink with disastrous results. In the end there was only one thing I could do & that was to admit I was powerless over alcohol & that I could never drink again... PERIOD!
As hard as that is/was to handle at first it was also a major relief. Drinking & all of the negative effects that go with it are a lot of work, put some of that same effort into not picking up that first drink & make some positive changes in your life and thoughts that support your sobriety & you will start to see the beginnings of a new sober life & recovery.
Where do you think you are going wrong? For me it was always thinking that I could somehow handle a couple of drinks.. Ha.. I never wanted a couple... I wanted all I could get.
Stay connected here on SR, keep reading & posting and make a committed effort to make changes in your life & you will find that your sobriety dates start to get longer & better.
YOU can do this but YOU have to do it! There are no magic bullets that I know of, some find the program of AA & other programs help them along their path to recovery. Others seem to work on their addiction themselves and others focus on reading posting sharing & helping here on SR is just right for them. There are many recovered alcoholics that have done all three to beat this thing (and more). Stretch yourself into your program & sobriety and you will find what works for you. Its worth the effort I promise you that.
All of the best in your recovery.
Sincerely ~ NB
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,146
Try again, even harder this time?
If you decide not to drink but after a while can't do that then perhaps more will be required of you. No alcoholic I know wants to do more than the minimum they believe is required.
But if one level of inconvenience isn't enough, then raising your efforts to the next level is indicated. You may find the final level of effort required from you that produces and maintains the results that you need is very inconvenient, indeed.
If you decide not to drink but after a while can't do that then perhaps more will be required of you. No alcoholic I know wants to do more than the minimum they believe is required.
But if one level of inconvenience isn't enough, then raising your efforts to the next level is indicated. You may find the final level of effort required from you that produces and maintains the results that you need is very inconvenient, indeed.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,347
Hi lor
I remember you - sorry you're struggling.
I think support's very important - did you use SR much? Are there other avenues of support you'd be open to trying like a recovery group (AA, SMART, etc) or counselling?
Maybe have an honest talk with your Dr?
the fact is, the sooner you act the better - it doesn't get better on it's own lor - it's like a snowball rolling down hill....
I'd think seriously about looking for extra support - fight this before it becomes even bigger an opponent...
D
I remember you - sorry you're struggling.
I think support's very important - did you use SR much? Are there other avenues of support you'd be open to trying like a recovery group (AA, SMART, etc) or counselling?
Maybe have an honest talk with your Dr?
the fact is, the sooner you act the better - it doesn't get better on it's own lor - it's like a snowball rolling down hill....
I'd think seriously about looking for extra support - fight this before it becomes even bigger an opponent...
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Philly PA
Posts: 814
Hi Lor we joined at the same time. It's so weird that last night I was just thinking about you. I'm at 3 weeks today and all I can say is it was hard to get through some of the evenings but as my willpower is going down so are the cravings. Still tough though. If I wasn't on Antabuse I might have slipped.
Just get super committed. Get really ready and then do whatever you have to not to drink.
Hope to see you around
Just get super committed. Get really ready and then do whatever you have to not to drink.
Hope to see you around
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,047
Hello lor,
When you quit the last time and were sober, was worked for you and what didn't? I went for a long walk and thought about this question too.. "What's working, and what's not working for me?" - When I found the negatives that were not working for me, I thought of ways to replace them with positive things instead.
When you quit the last time and were sober, was worked for you and what didn't? I went for a long walk and thought about this question too.. "What's working, and what's not working for me?" - When I found the negatives that were not working for me, I thought of ways to replace them with positive things instead.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,247
Hi Lor,
I understand the feelings well. I am on day 10. Don't be hard on yourself. Take it one day at a time.Tomorrow is another day. Reading the posts on SR are helping me. I find it a very hard struggle in the early evenings.
You are not alone..You can do this. Stay stong and don't listen to the voice.
One thing that is helping me is reading the post of those who hard gone though the struggle and feel much better at 60/90/120 days. Recently several people have posted that they are 1 year sober and comment who much life is. Every posts talk about how hard the stuggle is, but in the end they are in a better place. Those help me a great deal.
It is worth it. Last week end was my first week end sober in many years. I plan on getting though this weekend as well.
If I can do it you can too.
I understand the feelings well. I am on day 10. Don't be hard on yourself. Take it one day at a time.Tomorrow is another day. Reading the posts on SR are helping me. I find it a very hard struggle in the early evenings.
You are not alone..You can do this. Stay stong and don't listen to the voice.
One thing that is helping me is reading the post of those who hard gone though the struggle and feel much better at 60/90/120 days. Recently several people have posted that they are 1 year sober and comment who much life is. Every posts talk about how hard the stuggle is, but in the end they are in a better place. Those help me a great deal.
It is worth it. Last week end was my first week end sober in many years. I plan on getting though this weekend as well.
If I can do it you can too.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 274
Hi lor, Sorry your going through a bad time.
My advice is to tip the booze out, you don't have to dig any deeper and give that shovel some rest. It's hard I know ony because I been where your are and it sucks.
I best thing I did was call my doctor up and made a appt and got honest with him. He got me into a recovery plan where I learn the tools to help me live a life that I could never imagined I would have. Maybe this could help you too...
Best Wishes
My advice is to tip the booze out, you don't have to dig any deeper and give that shovel some rest. It's hard I know ony because I been where your are and it sucks.
I best thing I did was call my doctor up and made a appt and got honest with him. He got me into a recovery plan where I learn the tools to help me live a life that I could never imagined I would have. Maybe this could help you too...
Best Wishes
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 6,262
Lor.....my heart breaks for you. Tomorrow get up and decide your just not going to drink on Friday. Remember: You don't HAVE to drink! Are you in AA? I couldn't have gotten sober without the support of other alcoholics, especially during the first year when my emotions were extremely volatile.
You're not a bad person, it's not about character. We have a disease that wants us dead. Any alcoholic who doesn't drink even for one day is very courageous.
You're not a bad person, it's not about character. We have a disease that wants us dead. Any alcoholic who doesn't drink even for one day is very courageous.
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