quitforme79

This is an excerpt from an article I found in a psychology magazine and just thought it may be a little helpful to someone. It was to me...

"The antidote to addiction is learning to tolerate reality. Little by little. That is what sobriety really is. This is what the recovering addict needs the most assistance with: soberly dealing with inner and outer reality. And part of existential reality involves personal responsibility. We are responsible for consciously facing and dealing with our inner demons as constructively as possible. And we are responsible for dealing maturely with the outer world. It is clear that, especially for so-called celebrities sheltered from reality by fame and money, sobriety ( be it from alcohol or other substance abuse or compulsive sexual behavior) demands accepting the same reality we all deal with every day: being responsible for ourselves; making choices that are in our own best interest; tolerating tedium, frustration, anxiety and life's inevitable physical and emotional suffering. Addiction is the habitual avoidance of reality. What the addict needs to discover is that reality is bigger than we are. A devastating blow to one's narcissistic grandiosity, to be sure. But the beginning of healing wisdom and willingness to accept and embrace reality-including both its negative and positive aspects--on its own terms".

avalouise

Love it....thank you.

SDSurfn

I've been moving ever closer to understanding this.

Thank you for posting this.

-SD

freshstart57

Addiction feeds itself in this environment. A minor upset during a sober time can become a major crisis during an active time that needs lots of big drinks. This then needs more and bigger drinks the next day.

Bethany57

This is so profound. Thank you for sharing. This, to me, is the answer to overcoming an addiction. Accepting reality and not trying to escape it.

Sparkydog

Personal responsibility, this is why I stopped drinking.

quitforme79

ME TOO Sparkydog and Bethany. My last drinking "incident" didn't even come close to my worst but something in me clicked.For me, reality can be the hardest thing to bear but it gets easier with practice and is 100% manageable sober. I also notice that I get so much more done financially, socially and personally. I am so commited to this life now and reading about it here and in articles such as the one above gives me even more insight and understanding.

Ranger

And in my case, I could add the adverb "unknowing" to "habitual". In retrospect it is all too clear. But, at the time I never thought anything like "man, I need 12 beers so I can escape reality".

Thanks for the post, QFM!

onlythetruth

All very true. In short, recovery is growing up.