Farfalla

7 days of detox and then rehab minimum of 35 days. I pray he relishes in the help he is so blessed to be given. So many people tonight were turned away because their insurances denied their admission. Please pray for me and my family. You all said the drugs were probably far worse than I knew and you all were so right. He was involved in much more.

suki44883

It's a good first step. I hope he immerses himself in recovery. It's really the only way he is going to beat this thing. Of course, I will pray for your family, but please know that this is only a small step on a very, very long road.

steelmagnolia

he is a lucky man....treatment is a gift. and, he has a wife who obviously loves him. he will get the tools he needs....if he takes them. be prepared....it will continue to be a struggle. but, at least you can see a rainbow in the distance. best of luck to you both....mags

Farfalla

Thank you. I am very nervous and scared.

dollydo

That is a good start, don't get your hopes up too high, he has a long hard road ahead of him.

As for you, there is nothing to be scared of. THIS is his problem to resolve. Go about your everyday life, keep going to meetings, your recovery is part of finishing the entire puzzle.

Have a nice day!

Farfalla

I know. He has to work at his recovery. I pray he accepts sobriety and his chance at a new life. I am not getting my hoPes up.

Seren

Try not to be afraid, he is exactly where he needs to be to detox in the hands of people qualified to care for him.

Prayers for your husband, for you and the whole family.

Ann

Detox and early rehab are often volatile and emotional times for them. Don't be surprised if his emotions are all over the place. Yours may be too, so hang close to your meetings and support.

My prayers go out for you and for him, that this may be the time that brings him to a better path.

Hugs

addictionwife

I'm really glad for you that he was able to go. He is very lucky that you are supporting him through this. It's probably normal to not want to get your hopes up! Hang in there!

Ilovemysonjj

Great news, . As so many have said, Rehab is just the beginning. It will be entirely up to our A's to take the steps and commit to treatment.
Sending hugs and best thoughts to you and your family. I am also in that "hopeful" stage of waiting. Son started a 90 day rehab with a very intensive program on 10-24
Teresa

hopeful0323

Praying that your AH embraces recovery. I have been through the rehab thing multiple times with AXBF and my advice would be to take the opportunity to focus on you. Keep contact with him limited, if at all. These are both things I did not do until his last rehab visit. It can be stressful because as Ann said it tends to be an emotional, volatile time for the addict. Hugs and Prayers.

Farfalla

Thank you all.
I just spoke to his PCP on the phone. Filled him in on the addiction and abuse of the pain meds he has been prescribing. He says to me: why didn't you call sooner? I replied why didn't you question why his urine drug screen had no traces of opiates when he was on 15mg of Percocet every 6 hours for the past ten years? They were already planning to discharge him he said due to his behavior being suspicious. A letter is being mailed to my home today.
I am unsure what the road lies ahead for a relationship with him. I am taking each day as it comes and working on myself. I had a tiff with my sister yesterday. She preaches on her soap box and I was so mentally exhausted yesterday I had to tell her I don't know what the future will hold for a relationship with my husband I am just concerned about me and the kids at this point. She hung up on me. I can't give anyone a definite nor should I have to about MY relationship. I know she has my best interest at heart and only wants for me to have a future full of happiness but the delivery of her message is harsh and sometimes not the right time.
Any suggestions on how to handle family members who are obviously and not with out cause bias when it comes to your future with an addict?

suki44883

I had to tell her I don't know what the future will hold for a relationship with my husband I am just concerned about me and the kids at this point.

What you said to your sister is perfect. If they can't accept that, then I'd wonder if they really do have your best interests at heart.

laurie6781

In the past I have had to do this with certain family members. I was as polite as I could be, here is a synopsis of what I would say to them, over and over like a broken record, and they eventually 'got it', well at least most of them:

"Thank you for that information. However, until you have walked several miles in my shoes, I will continue to do what the 'experts' are telling me."

And I would change the subject. If they persisted, I would walk away or get off the phone.

All the 'suggestions' and 'rules' that my family seemed to want to apply for a 'normal' relationship, went out the window when it was up close and personal in the face of addiction. Couples counseling? Nope, not unless the other person got clean and sober first. Reasoning with person? Nope, there is no 'reasoning' with an A. Sitting down and having a 'calm' conversation with said person? Nope. Not feasible when person is full of toxins. A has no clue about being 'reasonable.' etc etc

The other way I found to stop the conversation or change it was to say:

"I am not comfortable discussing this at this time."

And again changing the subject.

Hope that helps a wee bit.

Love and hugs,