butterfly909

im young, just got by bachelors in criminology, i have a problem with drinking, so does my boyfriend. we have lived together for a year, no physical abuse, and we both want to get sober.

is it possible to love someone with all your heart but not know if its best to get sober together, is it even possible to get sober on the same track with someone?

does anyone know what to do, because i am just, lost..

pikkle69

I've been living with my fiance for almost 8 years. We were both alcoholics when we started living together and have been ever since. 17 days ago I stopped drinking, for me, not for anyone else. She did the same so that she would not enable me but I'm hoping she's doing it for herself as well. It's early on in sobriety for both of us. I'm not sure if it will work but we're trying and so far, we still love each other and I don't think that will change. If we can enable each other to drink, then I'm pretty sure we can enable each other not to drink, if we truly love each other. I do know one thing, if one of us drinks, then we're both drinking so I would say yes, get sober together. The sooner the better.

Dee74

welcome to SR Butterfly909

My advice is to focus on your self and your own recovery, and let your partner focus on his...

I wouldn't let my recovery be dependent in some way on my partner....that's not fair on either of you IMO.

D

least

I can see where it might be helpful to be getting sober with someone close to you, as long as you don't make your recovery all about the other person - do it for yourself.