soberred

I am 4 months into sobriety. It sounds like a long time to me. Some tend to forget all the terrible things they went through and feel its OK to go back to the booze. I, on the other hand, still have those terrible moments very fresh in my mind. Remembering almost ruining my career. Remembering almost getting a DUI. Remembering feeling as though I wanted to die. Walking to the walmart liquor store shaking so bad that it looked (and felt) as though I was having a seizure.The constant shame. I don't know if it is a good thing to relive those moments or not. I do know that it is a big deterrent when I get those moments of insanity to pick up a drink. I hate the constant memories. I want to move forward. I know I cannot remove the past but I cant help but relive it

lovinit41

if it keeps you on the waggon its got to be a great thing, eh? Wll done , 4 months is fantastic.....heres to the next four! x

MsJax

Soberred, hi. Congratulations on your 4 months I understand. Though I am moving on and feel I am progressing well in my life, at over 7 months I feel much as you do. I remember so well those horrible feelings. For me, that's a good thing. I am so grateful to not only be alive but to be sober It's ok to remember!

Tuesday24

Hi Soberred.

I think it is okay to remember out past in order to not repeat it. However, it can get unhealthy if we continuously obsess about it. From the words in your post, the latter seems to be the case.

Are you working a program? Perhaps a councilor may help?

I have recently found i my own life that expressing gratitude and being thankful for life's little things (may sound corny, but it works for me!) really helps me overcome my obsessive thoughts.

You can move forward

least

I'm almost two years in and still remember my last relapse like it was yesterday. And tho I'm not reliving it, it's still fresh and clear in my mind and I like it that way. A reminder of where I would end up if I went back to drinking.