In the end...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 54
In the end...
I wanted to put something clever in the title, but then not.
I've posted sporadically about my AW and her addiction with her medicines. She found peace last month. I sometimes thought it would end this way, but never seriously expected it. She overdosed on something; not sure what (toxicology takes a while). I think she made a tragic mistake.
I wish I had something to say to help others, but I don't. In the end, she was never able to confront her disease and deal with it. That is why she found peace... she did not like where she ended up. She knew what the problem was, but never could handle fixing it. And it was destroying our marriage, one of the few good things she had left.
I don't know... I just felt like I needed to post.
Don't worry, I'm not in a bad state... Just slowly moving on. Considering how much drama I had seen while she was alive... how much pain we put each other through... this is almost easier. But I wish she was alive; I'd go through the pain to help her.
I may need to help her parents a bit more though... just with simple conversation. I dealt with her addiction for over 2 years... I passed the denial of it a long time ago. I don't think they ever made it past that and wish they could have done more. I do too, but then I come to my senses. And... it was their daughter! I imagine it is horrible to lose a daughter.
-Tyler
I've posted sporadically about my AW and her addiction with her medicines. She found peace last month. I sometimes thought it would end this way, but never seriously expected it. She overdosed on something; not sure what (toxicology takes a while). I think she made a tragic mistake.
I wish I had something to say to help others, but I don't. In the end, she was never able to confront her disease and deal with it. That is why she found peace... she did not like where she ended up. She knew what the problem was, but never could handle fixing it. And it was destroying our marriage, one of the few good things she had left.
I don't know... I just felt like I needed to post.
Don't worry, I'm not in a bad state... Just slowly moving on. Considering how much drama I had seen while she was alive... how much pain we put each other through... this is almost easier. But I wish she was alive; I'd go through the pain to help her.
I may need to help her parents a bit more though... just with simple conversation. I dealt with her addiction for over 2 years... I passed the denial of it a long time ago. I don't think they ever made it past that and wish they could have done more. I do too, but then I come to my senses. And... it was their daughter! I imagine it is horrible to lose a daughter.
-Tyler
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
Tyler, I'm so sorry! There just aren't words. I hope you and her parents can eventually find peace. Grief is a long and sometimes very lonely journey...be kind to yourself and reach out for support.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Hello Tyler.
I am deeply sorry to hear that your wife passed away. My ex-wife is addicted to pain pills, so I know a little about what it's like to live with somebody like that. I was not able to maintain my sanity in that environment, so I left.
You just did. Coming here and sharing helps others. When I first overcame my denial I went to meetings of al-anon and listened to the other guys share about their lives. I saw in their lives where mine was going. I realized that I did not have the ability to survive my wife's addiction, that it would kill me long before it would kill her.
The guys that shared in al-anon saved _my_ life, even though they did not know it at the time. Likewise, you have shown a lot of people here what _their_ future might be. Hopefuly it will jog them out of whatever rut they are in and find a better solution for their situation.
By sharing here you are honoring the good side of your wife, and you are allowing her suffering to have a purpose for many others. That is what this website is all about, turning our pain into hope and direction for others.
I don't know if you are a praying man, so if you are not please accept my apologies if you are not. I will pray for her, and you, and all that loved her. And I thank you for the willingness to come here and share.
Mike.
I am deeply sorry to hear that your wife passed away. My ex-wife is addicted to pain pills, so I know a little about what it's like to live with somebody like that. I was not able to maintain my sanity in that environment, so I left.
Originally Posted by Tyler312 
...I wish I had something to say to help others, but I don't. ...
The guys that shared in al-anon saved _my_ life, even though they did not know it at the time. Likewise, you have shown a lot of people here what _their_ future might be. Hopefuly it will jog them out of whatever rut they are in and find a better solution for their situation.
By sharing here you are honoring the good side of your wife, and you are allowing her suffering to have a purpose for many others. That is what this website is all about, turning our pain into hope and direction for others.
I don't know if you are a praying man, so if you are not please accept my apologies if you are not. I will pray for her, and you, and all that loved her. And I thank you for the willingness to come here and share.
Mike.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I am sorry, Tyler, for this very sad ending, the very ending we all fear most.
As a mother I am proud of you for working with her mother and family to help comfort them through this terrible time.
You are all in my prayers, may your wife rest peacefully now in the arms of God.
Hugs
As a mother I am proud of you for working with her mother and family to help comfort them through this terrible time.
You are all in my prayers, may your wife rest peacefully now in the arms of God.
Hugs
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