Jallen83

Please forgive me if this has been posted a hundred times before but-
Are non- Christians really accepted at AA meetings? Are they welcome at the meetings? I've heard there is such an importance placed on God at these meetings and I don't really believe in God.

I'm 3 days sober and desperate to keep my sobriety. Its been difficult because I've moved 6 months ago and don't really know anyone in my area and AA seems to be the only things I can find that offers regular help for alcoholics here.

A little more about me...
Im 28 year old male living in northeastern NY for the past 6 months. I've been an alcoholic for 8 years. My drinking has gotten "severe" the past 2 years. Sometimes I "need" that drink everyday- a few days I do not. I've recently started binge drinking to the point I need 2 or 3 days to recover and dangerous things have started happening (waking up with a busted nose, leaving my apt and not remembering) that sort of thing. I feel like I'm at a critical point in my drinking where its going to escalate even further if I don't stop.

I'm ready to stop and do whatever it takes. Yesterday I made an appt. with a doctor. I joined this site 3 days ago. And I want to go to AA meetings to meet others like me but I'm just not sure if it will work because I'm not Christian and don't really believe in a God. Any thoughts???

Thanks for letting me share...

munchkin05

Jallen,
LOL I just posted something or another along the same lines.
While I'm not a complete Athiest or Agnostic I just have a hard time being a "devout Christian".
I have yet to attend a meeting but from what I have heard from others you definitely do NOT need to be a Christian or believe in God in order to attend AA meetings.
Maybe just try out a few in your area and see if you can find one that is a good fit for you?

Jallen83

Yea I just started reading the thread next to mine about being disallusioned with AA. At least it sounds like I'm not the only one.

Just giving a few meetings a try is great advice. If it doesn't feel right, I'm not obligated to go back.
I appreciate your good advice.

keithj

AA's Big Book has a whole chapter devoted to agnostics and atheists. It states that about 1/2 the original membership who got sober fell into those categories.

Personally, I walked into AA years ago as a life-long staunch atheist who thought the idea of a higher power was a crutch fro weak-minded people. However, I could not stop drinking, and those AA folks had a way out. I was willing to just abandon myself to the process of the 12 Steps.

Over the years, my ideas and concepts about spirituality have evolved. They are very different from what I came into the program with, but they are not what me or anyone else would consider 'Christian.' They do however, work wonderfully well for contented, lasting sobriety.

laurie6781

There are many "Non Christians" in AA. Be they Athiest, Agnostic, Buddhist, Muslim, etc

When you hear the word God, train your mind to think of this:

G.O.D. = Good Orderly Direction

or

G.O.D. = Group Of Drunks

It is a great place to start. I came in an ex Catholic with a lot of animosity towards all Organized Religion and I was told that I could pick anything I wanted as a Power Greater Than Myself .................... The Universe, the Oceans, a Tree, heck even a rock because where I was at they all had more power than me.

I was so 'sick' (in the head as well as body, lol) that for my first year of recovery I used a Harley Davidson Motorcycle. I know it sounds funny now, but it worked for me, until I was clear headed enough to start my SEARCH for what I did believe.

After 'working' those steps, and then learning how to live those steps, and continuing my search I devised a simple saying that works for me every day. Now some days I admit are better than others, but as long as I go to bed at night knowing I did the best I could for that day then it has been a good day.

"Just for today, to the best of my ability, I will treat all who cross my path with thoughtfulness, kindness and consideration and treat all as I wish to be treated.

J M H O

Love and hugs,

Programmer27

You sound exactly like me. I'm attending AA currently, and while I don't prescribe to any particular belief, I don't like being close minded to anything either.

(I believe the best answer we as humans can give to the side of spirituality, the unknown, and things we aren't able to explain in the universe, is simply, I don't know... yet.) Until science explains more, or I have a spiritual awakening of some kind, I will continue to take an approach of humility.

I go to AA, and I listen to what others have to say about a/their higher power, but I don't fully agree or disagree. Not because I don't have an opinion, but because it's not my place, nor is it within the bounds of what I know to be true or false, to be the judge and jury on a subject that even the most devout religous leaders and the most intelligent astro physists contemplate daily.

I guess what I'm trying to say, in a long drawn out way, is that my sobreity is worth my willingness to be open minded.

Taking5

One of the best AAers I've ever met is an atheist. Seriously, most meetings open with the serenity prayer, which is not in the bible and is a very non-denominational prayer. They do close (for the most part) with the Lords Prayer, which is a christian prayer.

For the other 58-1/2 minutes, you are as likely to hear profanity as you are to hear the word "Jesus". That's something that doesn't happen at church.

So if you can get past a minute and a half of this, you're home free.

GettingStronger2

I'm not a Christian, and I am a member of AA. Our rooms are open.

PaperDolls

I'm not a Christian and am a member of AA.

It took me years to get past my old ideas and thoughts so I understand how you're feeling. I'll tell you though, I've never been happier in my life.

Just as others in my home group accept my concept of a higher power I accept theirs, even if I don't get it. It's only important that I get my concept. After all, it is mine.

If you've never been to a meeting, you can't really fairly decide if you don't like it. Right?

Jallen83

Those posts really help thanks guys.
I'm a very open minded person and could care less about any persons faith I was just concerned that was a major component of the meetings and was concerned that would be pushed on me.
I appreciate your posts.

freshstart57

Jallen, AA has been a lifesaver for many, believer and atheist alike. There are alternative secular 12 step programs and secular non-12 step approaches to sobriety, too.

Jallen83

This is the first time I've really felt 100% helpless against alcohol and it's a pretty scary realization to come to. I used to think I would never need anything like AA but the increase and severity of my drinking has humbled me a lot. I want to do whatever it takes.

sugarbear1

why not go to some meetings and ask that question. I know many athiests & agnostics in meetings. my religion is non christian. aa saved my life!

Jallen83

Sugarbear, that is the decision I have come to.
Great advice.
What does it hurt to just go and see?
I've got nothing to lose (except for the alcoholism) and everything to gain!
You guys really helped to break many of the stereotypes I had in my mind. Who knows, maybe my alcoholism created those reasons so I would NOT go!

sugarbear1

just try several meetings. my noon meetings are full of court slip signers sent by court...night meetings and early morning meetings seem to have serious aa'ers. just keep trying!

best wishes on a soberly wonderful life!

and say your name, us regulars know who is new!

ArgentOfSilvae

Welcome to SR Jallen,

Congrats on day 3! it feels good doesn't it!

I suppose im an atheist but I dont really give it much thought these days to be honest. When I first decided to go to AA I had much the same thoughts, I didn't want to go somewhere to have religion shoved down my throat, I especially didn't want to be told that only God could save me from this hole I was in, but eventually I built up the courage to actually pick up the phone...

I will refer again to the first person I met at AA (i mentioned him in another post somewhere) he was kind enough to meet me outside and just chat for a few moments before I decided to go in. He really didn't care at all wether I was religious (i broached the subject early) nor did he tell me what his religious persuasion was. He simply talked to me as an equal about my problem with drink.

Like others have said in this thread, once you get inside there is not a great deal of discussion about religion, sure there are religious folks there that do believe in God, and you may hear a lot of talk of a higher power, but mostly its just people getting help.

In a later meeting someone said that maybe thinking of AA as the higher power would help me, something to hold onto in my time of need, something to reach out to.

Having said that at the time it wasn't for me, I do however recommend that people try it, while it may not be for them, it just might be! and it can certainly open your eyes to some parts of yourself you may not have recognised.

Again congrats! and keep posting

AoS

onlythetruth

AA teaches that the individual person is powerless over his or her addiction and therefore requires the intervention of a "higher power" in order to recover.

If you like that way of looking at things, and feel it would be helpful to you to approach recovery from that angle, then don't let your lack of a Christian faith stand in your way. Obviously, many non-Christians are able to utilize AA successfully.

If, on the other hand, you do not care for that philosophy or find it personally helpful, it's important to know that AA is not your only choice when it comes to recovery support groups. Several others exist (SMART Recovery, LifeRing, SOS, Women for Sobriety) which are not faith-based. And there is Rational Recovery, which is an approach, not a support group.

You have lots of choices. But the most important thing of all is to know that you CAN do this.....and you don't have to do it alone, unless you want to.

OceanSize

Hi there.

I tried to read all of the replies here but may have missed a few so please forgive if someone mentioned this, but....are you familiar with the "Set Aside Prayer" in Alcoholics Anonymous?

please note: the word "prayer" has nothing to do with any religious sect, it's just an action that we take, and that is what it is.

anyway, i am jewish and in AA - but my ultimate point is....that's irrelevant - the Higher Power i have found in AA has nothing to do with religion, or my ethnicity. It has nothing to do with my old ideas. It's a completely new way of thinking (for me).

someone told this to me and it helped a lot: "the only thing you need to know about god is that it's not you"

yay! i don't rule the world! i don't pray for materials! god won't strike me down! i don't have to have any of the similar struggles i've had with god...at all! it's not that god! (in meetings i call the god i grew up with "jew god" - and i'm still jewish! like, totally jewish)

my point is - that the word god is used because there's few other simple words for "higher power" but ultimately in my experience the only way i can work these steps is to set aside any and all of my preconceived notions about the world - including god. which does mean (for me) having a higher power which has no opinion, but is simply...not me. Higher Power doesn't judge. It just is. And it's not me.

the "set aside" prayer is:

Lastly, before i became desperate and frightened enough to actually get sober, i had a lot of ideas about AA and had been to meetings. I used to use the basket-passing (7th tradition) as my excuse. I used to say "they talk about god and pass a basket, of course it's religious" but that was my disease convincing me to keep a closed mind. The truth about it is, without that basket passing, the AA meeting couldn't pay rent to have the room - and all excess money goes to central office where they simply use it to make more literature to help other alcoholics of all types. Part of this program truly means to let go of old beliefs, and my experience so far is that I am sober as a result.

My old ideas kept me wasted. for years and years. complete demoralization within my disease is what opened my mind to the idea that if i'm willing to get sober, i need new ideas around how the world works. and how i have nothing to do with ruling the universe. and how my big ego and preconceived notions are all keeping me sick.

keep coming back - they say it b/c it works.

oh - did i mention i grew up in a very conservative/ ortho jewish home? that too.

and yet.....

the set aside prayer...

goalofsobriety

"accepting a higher power" has nothing to do with being Christian. Your higher power can be anything that is greater than you. I'm a spiritual person, not a Christian.

Jallen83

I guess for some reason I thought the group had a "Christian" agenda. I'm not sure why I thought this. I understand "higher power" can mean different things for different people.
I guess I probably kept a closed mind and stayed ignorant about the subject so I could continue to think "don't try it. It won't work for you" and continue to drink.
Wow, it's amazing to begin to see just how sneaky the sauce can be.