horsekisses

I am so tired today. Didn't sleep well last night. Couldn't turn my head off and hubby kept snoring. I did move to the spare room but that didn't help much. Usually when I have nights like this I get up and drink a couple stiff drinks. Didn't do that last night. Most nights I had enough alcohol in me when I went to bed. Today will be day 3 for me. These next few days will be hard. Normally if I do stop drinking few days during the week I start again on Thursday nights and always can't wait till Friday night when I can drink all I want and stay up late. On Fridays I stop at store before leaving town, get an 18 pack and start drinking on the way home. Wish I had someone to text or call but not ready to tell anyone. I've told hubby many times that I was going to stop drinking beer to lose weight. I usually just switch to vodka or gin until I give in to the bll again. Hubby just shakes his head never says anything. He likes me to drink on Friday nights, its sex night.

sugarbear1

You can stay stopped! (sex is better sober)

sadsoul2011

I sure hope you can sleep better tonight!! Think how much better you will be sleeping by next week at this time Thursdays are a really tough day aren't they? For 20+ years it has meant party! party! start the weekend! Hard to change the mindset isn't it....

We can do it though!

I'm trying to plan healthy/normal activities to fill up the time and get excited about. Everytime my brain starts to talk to me about drinking I make myself think about what I'm planning for the weekend. I'm not allowing myself to feel that I'll be missing out on anything. Concentrating on being grateful for the peaceful weekend I will have. I also keep playing the weekend forward and concentrating on how Monday morning will feel after a sober weekend. Very motivating for me!

What are you planning to do to stay sober? I'd love to hear your ideas

velmaT

I think this is why my husband is not willing to admit that I have a drinking problem...because the sex is MUCH more frequent when I'm drinking. I am not sure if this is good or bad advice, but it's just what I am trying. Take it with a grain of salt. During my first few days of being sober, I have initiated the intimacy 2 nights in a row, when I REALLY didn't feel like it. I have such a tough time being in the mood when I am not drinking. I was basically forcing myself to get into it at the beginning. In the end, I had a good time....second night, a great time! I feel like I need to prove to hubby that sex will not disappear if I stop drinking. I figure that it will get easier the more sober time I have under my belt to find other ways to get in the mood. Again...not sure if this is advice to heed to, but just an idea. Sending positive thoughts your way this weekend! Don't stop at the store on Friday night! Just keep driving! **{hugs}}

Sara23

I dont know about you but when I am sober sex is much more enjoyable because I can feel everything so much better and my mind is more focused! Tell your hubby you want to try something "new" meaning sober sex and maybe throw in a new position or something and see how yall like it. While alcohol does loosen us up it doesnt exactly mean that the sex is "better."

juststopit

horsekisses: same problem here (well sort of). When I am sober my husband complains we don't have enough sex, but he says that he doesn't enjoy it when I am drunk. I have been trying the same thing as Velma...initiating even when I don't feel like it. One of my issues is that when I am sober I think to much about whether I "want" to have sex or not. And to be honest it often feels like too much effort. I am also much more aware of my own body image issues. I just keep reminding myself that he clearly wants to have sex with me so my body issues irrelevant.

Anyway, when it comes down to it...you are in control of you, not him. He may think he likes sex better when you are drunk, but if he uses that as an excuse for not supporting your sobriety he is just being ridiculous. Ask him to give it a few weeks and see if you can't change his mind!

Dee74

It's easy to find reasons not to change things, even tho we know we should.

It took me a week or two to get back into a normal sleeping pattern - I'd been drinking myself to sleep for years.

If insomnia continues to be a problem and is concerning you please see your Dr

As far as your husband goes, maybe you need to try and explain to him, agian if necessary, what drinkings doing to you and getting sober means to you? Your husbands desire for sex is not a good enough reason to keep you in a lifestyle you clearly want to escape from.

I hope you find some numbers at the womens meeting....until then you can log on here anytime

D

horsekisses

Thanks for the suggestions. I usually don't enjoy sex sober. It's hard for me to relax and enjoy it. My body is awful. Going to be really hard not drinking tomorrow night. I've lived each week for the last 19 years waiting for friday night so I could "really" drink. Still planning to go to meeting on Saturday, and I hate to go to town on weekends. I also hate asking for help and looking weak.