seekinganswrs

It's amazing how much has become clear in the past month. I feel like God has literally "ordered my steps," so I can see the truth behind all the lies. The sad thing is that I doubt I will ever know the whole truth. My husband left for his job again on Monday and before he left I was talking to my mom over the phone and she asked if they found out who broke into the truck. I said I didn't know what she was talking about and she said my husband had told her that his work truck got broken into. ??? So I asked him about it before he left and he said that all that was taken was a drill and level, so he didn't mention it, which I thought was odd.

Anyhow, my sister calls me this a.m. and asked me if I know his work truck was broken into, and I asked her what she knew about it and she said she didn't want to say and just didn't want me to freak out. She tells me that My AH called my mom about a month ago and got some pills from her (20) and that he called back and got 30 from her, and then called again and said the work truck was broken into and they took the pills as well and tried to get more. I didn't know he had gotten ANY pills from my mom!!! My mom gets them for her foot and fills them, but doesn't really use them. She may take 4 or 5 in a month. My sister said she told my mom that I probably didn't know about it, and she should tell me. I then called my mom and she said that she told my AH that she wanted to make sure I knew and he said he would tell me. She told me that he told her that the work he is doing is hard on his back and he needs them. Ultimately, she gave him 50 total and he called her again, but she was out of town. My mom doesn't really understand (until today) the fullness of the problem with my husband. She knows he has back pain and needs to work ,so she thought she was helping him.

I called him out of town and told him that I had been thinking and the story he told me about his work truck doesn't seem to make sense, why would I hear about it from my mom and not him. He said because it is a lie. He said he told my mom that and said that his pills were stolen so he could get some from her. BTW, he doesn't have any pills because the doctors won't prescribe him anymore because of his "failed" drug test, which means when they tested him they weren't in his system because he abuses them. So, I asked him, "Did you get any pills from my mom?" He said NO. So, then I said, "If I call my mom and ask her, she will tell me that she didn't give you any pills?" and he said NO! Then he basically just said that he would talk to me later about it.

He was also out last night where he is working. He told me he didn't take his tramadol or cymbalta because he wanted to try to have nothing for just one day, but he then proceeded to tell me he had about 2-3 beers. I told him that was unacceptable and that is not what he should be doing if he is trying to show me that he wants our marriage.

I did go get a job today. It's only 8 hours each week, but it's assisting in the human resources dept of my old agency I used to work for, so hoping I can find more hours eventually there or even find another company that needs a part time person.

I know in the "Are you a Co-Dependent person" sticky in the threads above, it says you will feel the need to rehearse what your story is, or what has happened and before I even posted, I thought, I don't want to do that, I don't want to have to rehearse it. BUT I DO WANT TO REMEMBER IT!!! I want to remember all of this, so when I am tempted to cave in on one of my boundaries, or let him back in after I kick him out this weekend, I won't!!!! I can clearly see that I cannot believe anything that he says and I can't do this anymore.

TMZ

Thanks for sharing, sorry for your pain.

Your mom and sister need to know what is going on and be on board with you.
The A will tell you anything to keep up the addiction.

seekinganswrs

TMZ,
Thanks! I told my mom tonight that we are going to separate tonight, or at least when he comes back in town that his stuff will be packed up. She didn't take it as bad as I thought. I didn't go into it too much. I think she knows I am stretched to my limit and her worrying just makes it worse. I met with her tonight and my boys are spending two nights with her, so I can pack my AH's stuff up (their dad). I haven't told the boys yet.

Kindeyes

I'm sorry for all of the things you are going through. Addiction is an ugly disease.

You, your boys and your husband are in my prayers today.

gentle hugs
ke

seekinganswrs

Kindeyes,
Thank you for the prayers. We will all need them. About to go in town and get boxes to pack his stuff while the kids are with my mom and he is out of town with work, so they don't have to see him or I do that.

Aegian

Keeping you in my thought, SA.

I like the idea of you having the house to yourself to pack. It will likely help you focus, but will also allow you some me/down time if you need an emotional break.