this is strange... happiness
this is strange... happiness
Hey hey,
So I was outside of work on a smoke break. I had to pause because I had a strange feeling/mood. I wasn't worrying about anything including my own defects, or thinking of my past relationship gone sour (for the first time in weeks.) It occurred to me that I think... I was feeling happy... and that I might have something resembling a smile on my face
I ended up leaving work and heading to meet with my sponsor at my home group. That went well and from there I went into an 8 o'clock meeting. A lot of the group consisted of men from a long term treatment facility which I think is awesome because the variety of stories is amazing. Anyway since there were so many people, the discussion leader decided we should all go around and say what we were doing at a meeting on a Saturday night. All of the experiences that everyone shared really put a lot in perspective for me. It brought me back to my happiness feeling from earlier in the day.
On the way home I started thinking about what I would have been doing if I wasn't in sobriety. How little control I'd have over my entire day. Either it would have started with a hangover from getting wasted last night. Or I would have been mad that I had to work while everyone is drinking and watching football, and thinking of nothing else than getting to the bar after work. Most likely it would have been a combination of those two scenarios.
It's days like today that remind me why I am moving forward in sobriety. To be able to feel content with who I am and appreciate the smaller things that make life enjoyable. I just wanted to share my good day because as much as I've been on an emotional roller coaster, things are looking up. For today I can say that it really does get better!
So I was outside of work on a smoke break. I had to pause because I had a strange feeling/mood. I wasn't worrying about anything including my own defects, or thinking of my past relationship gone sour (for the first time in weeks.) It occurred to me that I think... I was feeling happy... and that I might have something resembling a smile on my face
I ended up leaving work and heading to meet with my sponsor at my home group. That went well and from there I went into an 8 o'clock meeting. A lot of the group consisted of men from a long term treatment facility which I think is awesome because the variety of stories is amazing. Anyway since there were so many people, the discussion leader decided we should all go around and say what we were doing at a meeting on a Saturday night. All of the experiences that everyone shared really put a lot in perspective for me. It brought me back to my happiness feeling from earlier in the day.
On the way home I started thinking about what I would have been doing if I wasn't in sobriety. How little control I'd have over my entire day. Either it would have started with a hangover from getting wasted last night. Or I would have been mad that I had to work while everyone is drinking and watching football, and thinking of nothing else than getting to the bar after work. Most likely it would have been a combination of those two scenarios.
It's days like today that remind me why I am moving forward in sobriety. To be able to feel content with who I am and appreciate the smaller things that make life enjoyable. I just wanted to share my good day because as much as I've been on an emotional roller coaster, things are looking up. For today I can say that it really does get better!
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: the high desert
Posts: 887
I had to pause because I had a strange feeling/mood. I wasn't worrying about anything including my own defects, or thinking of my past relationship gone sour (for the first time in weeks.) It occurred to me that I think... I was feeling happy... and that I might have something resembling a smile on my face
Thank you...that is really something to look forward to!
I get glimpses of that happiness just in my my measly three days without drinking..just being able to see things clearly and respond to things soberly makes me feel proud. But I'm looking forward to just feeling "happy" and not worried about everything little thing, and the future. Good for you!
I get glimpses of that happiness just in my my measly three days without drinking..just being able to see things clearly and respond to things soberly makes me feel proud. But I'm looking forward to just feeling "happy" and not worried about everything little thing, and the future. Good for you!
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