New and 2 days Sober
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 263
New and 2 days Sober
Hi All,
My mother passed away 4 years ago and I became a pretty heavy alcoholic right around that time. Drinking pretty much every night of the week. I'm 26 and I am absolutely terrified about my health. I am convinced I pushed my body too far. Went in to the Dr about a month and a half ago and they found high levels of bilirubin ast and alt. They did some more blood work....and everything came back basically within normal (slightly elevated ast 44 with "normal" topping at 40). I asked the DR about it and she said I was completely healthy and to not worry about it. Since then I feel like I am constantly experiencing pains in my mid right abdomen, I keep becoming convinced that my eyes are a slight yellow...I don't know what to do. The only thing that I want to do is have a drink to calm my nerves but obviously thats not the right solution. Sorry for the long rambling self-centered post. I am terrified and living alone with no family near by just makes me feel that much more isolated. Of course I don't even want to discuss my issues with my family because that would mean admitting I'm an alcoholic.
My mother passed away 4 years ago and I became a pretty heavy alcoholic right around that time. Drinking pretty much every night of the week. I'm 26 and I am absolutely terrified about my health. I am convinced I pushed my body too far. Went in to the Dr about a month and a half ago and they found high levels of bilirubin ast and alt. They did some more blood work....and everything came back basically within normal (slightly elevated ast 44 with "normal" topping at 40). I asked the DR about it and she said I was completely healthy and to not worry about it. Since then I feel like I am constantly experiencing pains in my mid right abdomen, I keep becoming convinced that my eyes are a slight yellow...I don't know what to do. The only thing that I want to do is have a drink to calm my nerves but obviously thats not the right solution. Sorry for the long rambling self-centered post. I am terrified and living alone with no family near by just makes me feel that much more isolated. Of course I don't even want to discuss my issues with my family because that would mean admitting I'm an alcoholic.
I'm here to learn!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: I'm on it!
Posts: 2,038
Hi.
Thank you for posting and welcome to SR. We are not allowed to provide medical advice, nor should you try to get any over the internet, however I think it's safe to say that the best thing you can do for your health right now is to quit drinking. The human body is a tremendously resilient organism, and it's possible that any damage you may have caused could still be reversible.
One thing you didn't mention in your post is if you were honest with the doctor about your drinking. That may have an effect on the advice they give you or their determination of how serious your bloodwork is.
Either way, if you keep drinking your health will only continue to decline. Most of the physical aches and pains I had while drinking disappeared after the one month mark and I have no long lasting health implications -- as of the latest physical I had after I got out of rehab.
BTW I was freaked out about my health too, so I can totally understand the anxiety about it causing you to go back to drinking. It's really that only coping method that we have when we are in our addiction. Perhaps if you were to go to an AA meeting you would feel some comfort being able to hear other's stories.
Thank you for posting and welcome to SR. We are not allowed to provide medical advice, nor should you try to get any over the internet, however I think it's safe to say that the best thing you can do for your health right now is to quit drinking. The human body is a tremendously resilient organism, and it's possible that any damage you may have caused could still be reversible.
One thing you didn't mention in your post is if you were honest with the doctor about your drinking. That may have an effect on the advice they give you or their determination of how serious your bloodwork is.
Either way, if you keep drinking your health will only continue to decline. Most of the physical aches and pains I had while drinking disappeared after the one month mark and I have no long lasting health implications -- as of the latest physical I had after I got out of rehab.
BTW I was freaked out about my health too, so I can totally understand the anxiety about it causing you to go back to drinking. It's really that only coping method that we have when we are in our addiction. Perhaps if you were to go to an AA meeting you would feel some comfort being able to hear other's stories.
I'm here to learn!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: I'm on it!
Posts: 2,038
Oh I'm sorry, I missed your subject line that says you are now two days sober. Congratulations! Stay committed to being sober and maybe check back with the doc after a month or so sober. Also please be careful if you are worried about withdrawal symptoms. If you begin to feel bad go straight to the ER, withdrawal can be very dangerous.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 263
Thanks for the reply Josh. I realize that internet is not a great place for medical advice (trust me I have seen both that I am absolutely fine and that I will die in the next 10 days from various google searches). In addition, yes I was honest. I want to live to get married (planning on proposing sometime in the next year), raise my kids etc, so I was completely open with the doctor about the fact that I drink 4-8 beers every night. I was thinking about AA meetings, but honestly the whole religious aspect doesn't do it for me. Although I find that now that I have admitted to myself that I am completely helpless in the face of alcohol I find it slightly more comforting if that makes sense.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Heaven & Earth
Posts: 50
Hi there,
I am new here as well and wanted to say hello. I can only imagine the loss of a parent and wanted to say congratulations on your 2 days. I'm an only child, as well as my mom, and she means the world to me. I fear the day when she crosses over but if I don't stop drinking, I have a feeling she will be burying me before my time.
Your two days means you are wanting to make a big change and I'm walking right by your side. This is day 1 of sobriety for me so let's keep up the great work and motivate one another.
As I type this, my liver is sore. I was told that the liver is a forgiving organ and to try taking milk thistle as a supplement. Just a suggestion but as mentioned above, a doctor knows best.
All the best in your endeavors! ~Gabriel
I am new here as well and wanted to say hello. I can only imagine the loss of a parent and wanted to say congratulations on your 2 days. I'm an only child, as well as my mom, and she means the world to me. I fear the day when she crosses over but if I don't stop drinking, I have a feeling she will be burying me before my time.
Your two days means you are wanting to make a big change and I'm walking right by your side. This is day 1 of sobriety for me so let's keep up the great work and motivate one another.
As I type this, my liver is sore. I was told that the liver is a forgiving organ and to try taking milk thistle as a supplement. Just a suggestion but as mentioned above, a doctor knows best.
All the best in your endeavors! ~Gabriel
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
Hi DDrayer
I'd definitely get a second opinion from a Dr - it's worth it for your piece of mind
As for as support goes, you'll find a lot of that here, and ideas on where to find real life support too - welcome
SR really helped me turn my life around - I know we can help you too
D
I'd definitely get a second opinion from a Dr - it's worth it for your piece of mind
As for as support goes, you'll find a lot of that here, and ideas on where to find real life support too - welcome
SR really helped me turn my life around - I know we can help you too
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 263
Thanks Dee, literally been in tears most of the last couple days. I'm sure part of that is the stress of quitting, some the stress of not being certain about my health. Already these boards seem to be an amazing source of love and support and its really great. I hope I can continue to share my story and help others for a long time to come.
Problem with a second opinion is like everyone financial. I am a graduate student living on a stipend, my university provided dr is the only one covered by insurance. Maybe I will try brave discussing this whole thing with my dad and ask him to help me get in to see a specialist.
Problem with a second opinion is like everyone financial. I am a graduate student living on a stipend, my university provided dr is the only one covered by insurance. Maybe I will try brave discussing this whole thing with my dad and ask him to help me get in to see a specialist.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome ddrayer - Way to go on getting to day 2 and being honest with the doctor. The first several days felt long and really strange (lots of emotion, too). I also had some insomnia and tiredness. It really does get better.....
Take it one day at a time and keep reading/posting - you're not alone!
Take it one day at a time and keep reading/posting - you're not alone!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: London
Posts: 1,384
I have all kinds of stomach pains at different times, I wake up in the night thinking I am going to have a heart attack, I sleep terrible , I have manic bleak thoughts I dry reach many mornings etc etc. I have stopped drinking, I remember glimpses From my last longest quit of all these things going and feeling great I want that way back forever.
Think as someone has said you have to stop drinking.
Think as someone has said you have to stop drinking.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 69
Keep going ddrayer - I have not been drinking for over a week now (after decades) and I am feeling great. This site has been a great support for me, but like you I don't do the religion bit. There are other paths to sobriety - try SMART & AVRT for starters check them out too.... I feel I need as much support as possible!
Someone mentioned milk thistle - brilliant - & don't forget litres & litres of water - it has literally been a life-saver for me.
Someone mentioned milk thistle - brilliant - & don't forget litres & litres of water - it has literally been a life-saver for me.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: UK Black Country
Posts: 94
Milk thistle, Id forgotten about that, will have to get some today. I dont do religion either but this site has been a great help to me Im only 10 days sober, it helps that there are so many here who are going through the same thing.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: North America
Posts: 162
Ddrayer,
Welcome to the forums and congrats on your 2 days sober. I too am new to sobriety and have found the support on SR to be incredible and very inspiring.
Keep up the hard work..it does get better!
Welcome to the forums and congrats on your 2 days sober. I too am new to sobriety and have found the support on SR to be incredible and very inspiring.
Keep up the hard work..it does get better!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 144
Ddrayer,
First, take a deep breath. You are moving in the right direction and not drinking is the first step in improving your whole life. I am not a Dr. so don't take this as medical advice but: my first few days sober I had a constant upset stomach and an overwhelming feeling of panic. I would go back and forth between feeling fine and convincing myself that I was at death's door. After a few days the panic moved away and the stomach pains went with it. For me, the guilt and shame from all those years of drinking caused actual physical pain.
On the other hand...it sounds like you have had stomach pains for about a month? Did you have the pains when you went to the Dr? If not, go back. Even if you go to the same Dr. What's the worst thing that can happen if you go back (to the original, free, Dr.)? Better to go and put your mind at ease.
First, take a deep breath. You are moving in the right direction and not drinking is the first step in improving your whole life. I am not a Dr. so don't take this as medical advice but: my first few days sober I had a constant upset stomach and an overwhelming feeling of panic. I would go back and forth between feeling fine and convincing myself that I was at death's door. After a few days the panic moved away and the stomach pains went with it. For me, the guilt and shame from all those years of drinking caused actual physical pain.
On the other hand...it sounds like you have had stomach pains for about a month? Did you have the pains when you went to the Dr? If not, go back. Even if you go to the same Dr. What's the worst thing that can happen if you go back (to the original, free, Dr.)? Better to go and put your mind at ease.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 263
Thank you all for the support. I do feel absolutely ridiculous being 3 days sober and having it something that I am proud of. Not that its not a big deal, but simply that I let myself fall that far.
Also thank you for the words of encouragement regarding my health. I was looking in the mirror today and am convinced that there is yellow showing in my eyes and tongue. terrifying because that seems like late stage symptoms but I will try not to panic. I have scheduled an appointment with the university provided Dr for tomorrow. I am not going to take no for an answer and will demand to be referred to a specialist (as long as its a referral its covered).
Juststopit: in regards to your question, no its only been in the last week or two. During Septemeber I was cycling 35 miles a day (fundraiser for breast cancer research), and towards the last week or two I started feeling like there was some pain in my abdomen. Anyway going to the dr either way for my the sake of my sanity.
I hope that everything works out. Thanks again everyone!
Also thank you for the words of encouragement regarding my health. I was looking in the mirror today and am convinced that there is yellow showing in my eyes and tongue. terrifying because that seems like late stage symptoms but I will try not to panic. I have scheduled an appointment with the university provided Dr for tomorrow. I am not going to take no for an answer and will demand to be referred to a specialist (as long as its a referral its covered).
Juststopit: in regards to your question, no its only been in the last week or two. During Septemeber I was cycling 35 miles a day (fundraiser for breast cancer research), and towards the last week or two I started feeling like there was some pain in my abdomen. Anyway going to the dr either way for my the sake of my sanity.
I hope that everything works out. Thanks again everyone!
Came to Believe
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Montgomery AL
Posts: 507
ddrayer, Congratulations on Day 3. It is a big deal and don't tell yourself otherwise -- be proud of every twenty-four hours sober. The first few days are the hardest, I think. I'm glad to hear that you're going back to see the doctor. As far as support goes, AA works for me (as long as I decide to do my part), and it's been my experience that people of any, all or no religious beliefs are welcome and can be helped by the program. The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking, which you clearly have. If AA's not for you, there are other options (I like a lot of the ideas behind Rational Recovery), and this board is a great place for support. Take your support where ever you find it. You're not alone. Stay strong and let us know how the doctor visit turns out.
--Fenris.
--Fenris.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Hi, and welcome to SR!
I had many months of discomfort under my ribs on my right side. I have no doubt my liver was enlarged. It's an incredibly resilient organ—my latest checkup (after about nine months sober) showed perfectly normal enzyme levels. If I had kept drinking, I'm quite sure I would have eventually damaged it beyond repair.
I'm really glad you've quit. Keep it up. My advice is that as you start to feel better, be vigilant against a little voice in your head telling you that you made too big of a deal of this, that you are perfectly able to have a drink now and then, that you're only 26 and couldn't possibly be in any real danger.... that's the voice of addiction, and it tells nothing but lies. But the good news is that it's powerless to do anything unless you act on it, and it will grow weaker over time.
It sounds like you have a great life ahead of you. You should be really proud that you're taking action now to protect your future.
I had many months of discomfort under my ribs on my right side. I have no doubt my liver was enlarged. It's an incredibly resilient organ—my latest checkup (after about nine months sober) showed perfectly normal enzyme levels. If I had kept drinking, I'm quite sure I would have eventually damaged it beyond repair.
I'm really glad you've quit. Keep it up. My advice is that as you start to feel better, be vigilant against a little voice in your head telling you that you made too big of a deal of this, that you are perfectly able to have a drink now and then, that you're only 26 and couldn't possibly be in any real danger.... that's the voice of addiction, and it tells nothing but lies. But the good news is that it's powerless to do anything unless you act on it, and it will grow weaker over time.
It sounds like you have a great life ahead of you. You should be really proud that you're taking action now to protect your future.
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