Newcomer again, it took me a while, but I'm back.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 650
Newcomer again, it took me a while, but I'm back.
Wow, long story. I guess I stopped coming on after I left my husband for a guy I met in NA, we just didn't have internet access and stopped going to meetings but were still staying clean together the 3 months we dated.
He turned out to be an abusive *******, and I ended up in a womens shelter for a while, still staying clean but had all but forgotten about this place after all I had been through.
Then my parents offered to fly me to my hometown and I said yes. Popped a couple xanax I had acquired legitimately on the flight over, said screw it, and started using again when I got here.
Used, not daily but a good bit, for about a month. Seems like much longer.
So there's this guy who I've liked since high school. Really good guy. Not like my ex AT ALL! Which is great. I've never been so comfortable around someone in all my life. He does not drink, smoke, or use, and he says he never will. We really like each other, but he is weary about my past and present lifestyle (drugs sex and booze) and rightfully so.
So I'm challenging myself to really do this. Not for him but because it's the right thing to do. I don't wanna be that person again. This is one person who actually makes me see that I care about myself and that I'm worth it.
I do have a bit of a reservation about if he still doesn't want to be together if I'm doing things right (I mean, it's not a long shot, we really like each other and stuff, he's just scared I guess) but I'm willing to work through that so I can stay clean even if it doesn't work out.
So anyway, that's my little story, tried to keep it short, but yeah, that's what's going on. Glad to be back.
He turned out to be an abusive *******, and I ended up in a womens shelter for a while, still staying clean but had all but forgotten about this place after all I had been through.
Then my parents offered to fly me to my hometown and I said yes. Popped a couple xanax I had acquired legitimately on the flight over, said screw it, and started using again when I got here.
Used, not daily but a good bit, for about a month. Seems like much longer.
So there's this guy who I've liked since high school. Really good guy. Not like my ex AT ALL! Which is great. I've never been so comfortable around someone in all my life. He does not drink, smoke, or use, and he says he never will. We really like each other, but he is weary about my past and present lifestyle (drugs sex and booze) and rightfully so.
So I'm challenging myself to really do this. Not for him but because it's the right thing to do. I don't wanna be that person again. This is one person who actually makes me see that I care about myself and that I'm worth it.
I do have a bit of a reservation about if he still doesn't want to be together if I'm doing things right (I mean, it's not a long shot, we really like each other and stuff, he's just scared I guess) but I'm willing to work through that so I can stay clean even if it doesn't work out.
So anyway, that's my little story, tried to keep it short, but yeah, that's what's going on. Glad to be back.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,910
Welcome back. I think you need to take care of your issues for a while and forget about men right now. You're jumping from one relationship to another when you actually have no business being in a realtionship right now. This guy from high school doesn't have any business getting mixed up with you, and if you truly cared about him, you wouldn't allow him to. Give the guy a break and stay away from him and start working on getting straight. You don't have anything to offer anyone right now, relationship wise.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Hello again onewithwings. It's great you found your way back to us. I hope this time you'll be able to stay the course and get well for good. Please keep posting - we care about you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 650
lol its ok.
I'm not sure if I'm moving back out there, I really don't have the help out here that I do here with my mom and my friends. My ex and my son are coming to visit for Christmas hopefully, so I'll probably get to see him soon.
I'm not sure if I'm moving back out there, I really don't have the help out here that I do here with my mom and my friends. My ex and my son are coming to visit for Christmas hopefully, so I'll probably get to see him soon.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Here & Now, WI
Posts: 21
Welcome back Onewithwings.
I don't know what to say about your post, as each situation concerning relationships is unique to the individual, but I just wanted to say hello and that I read your post and have subscribed to follow along
Best wishes on your new journey!
I don't know what to say about your post, as each situation concerning relationships is unique to the individual, but I just wanted to say hello and that I read your post and have subscribed to follow along
Best wishes on your new journey!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
I'm glad you're back!
I strongly believe that you should work on yourself now and your relationship with your son.
Relationships with other men should be at the very end of that list.
I strongly believe that you should work on yourself now and your relationship with your son.
Relationships with other men should be at the very end of that list.
New to Real Life
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: I come in Peaces
Posts: 2,071
Welcome back OWW. I do hope you are taking care of yourself and there are things in your post that are concerning me. IIRC you have a mental health dx and I hope that's under control. It's not making sense to me that you are so cavalier about not being with your child. You don't sound like 'you'.
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