zorilla

I've only been off of pills & booze for 14 days.
Everything I've tried to do today is not working out at all.
Car repairs are not looking very promising.My one computer won't work.
There's more crap;just too many things to mention.

I have a hard time even using my computer,driving or anything now that I'm not ****** up on amphetamines & booze anymore.I just can't seem to get that enthusiasm and in the groove feeling I used to get.
I was crying a little while ago ashamed of myself for even thinking that I really wish I had a pill and some beer.

I have so many good things going for me,and deep down I know that booze and pills won't make me any happier.They will make everything and anything worse and they'll ******* kill me...I just have to keep thinking about how awful it was.

LegalLady

Zorilla all I can say is I understand. I've been through it myself. I couldn't do laundry, clean the house or dare I say brush my teeth or take a shower. But, I kept in contact with people who reassured me that it would get better. And although I did not beleive them at the time, and I'm amaze even now, they were right. You can get through this. I still to this day don't know how it works, but talking with others who have experienced the same thing seems to help tremendously. Keep up the good work. You might feel like crud, but you didn't use and that is great right there.

Dee74

It takes time to readjust to life I think Zorilla.

It was like being a newborn baby for me some days - I'd relied on alcohola nd drugs so much that even everyday stuff was sometimes a challenge.

The thing is...we're not babies and we learn new skill fast and relearn pretty quickly how to deal with stuff.

Give yourself a chance - it's tough I know but you have support here - I hope you'll feel better in a week or two

D

jmf7dd

I've experienced the ups and downs that come with recovery. You can get though this and having a support system to turn to when you want to drink or use will be very helpful. Simply helping someone else in need helps me so much more than you could ever imagine. It takes my mind of me and I feel useful. Good luck you can do it!

firestorm090

Somedays, even now after a few months, I put on two different colored socks and some days I'll put a sock on one foot, but forget the other, lol. Today, and this is true, I was walking in the back yard of my brother's house trying to remember what I was going to do out there, till I looked in my hand and saw the tree saw I was carrying. Then it became perfectly clear, I was going to trim a couple branches off a big tree.'

Those are the kinds of days, medically speaking, (and there's countless scientific studies to prove this) when brain cramps keep tangling our thought patterns, and the lose screws keep jamming up the blood flow to our brain, lol.

Hang in there, you're doing great.

Glad you're off the sauce and pills, that's wonderful and you should be proud.

Cadrian

Some days are better than others.

I had a similar problem with my laptop, nothing would work, I had some computer whiz friend of a friend shake his head over it mournfully and I had some feeling of deep-seeded something I couldn't quite shake (sadness or rage, or a mixture of both)... I wasn't going to smash it, some kind of idiotic thrill... I let it go and tried not to mull over it.

And then I was able to fix it, being methodical, piece by piece... what's that saying, bite by bite and soon you'll have eaten the whole elephant?

---

Distraction is necessary even if it feels like... like, you're actively trying to trick yourself, even if it feels at times absurd, faking the "groove" will help.
My best example, putting on music you like in the background, or putting it on full blast (shutting the windows beforehand of course).

Mark75

That's the problem with coming off the stimulants. I lost a lot of enthusiasm early on, and it took a while to get it back, and even now, it is different. It is better. Hang in there.

zorilla

thanks everybody!!!!I knew I'd feel better after posting on here.I went to an AA meeting tonight and that helped too.There was a woman there that looked familiar, and after talking to her and telling her I just got out of rehab,she said she thought I looked familar;she was a nurse at the rehab...wow..

soberlicious

zorilla...remember that when drinking and using we chemically flood the brain which really messes with the natural dopamine cycle. Things may seem a little flat while the brain readjusts. It takes time. Eating right, exercise, music, hobbies, laughing, sunlight, all these things are said to naturally stimulate dopamine....

sugarbear1

Believe it or not, you're recovering! Just think, brain damage is real and the Best Part is that your brain is Healing! Keep staying stopped, you're worth it. Embrace the challenges, things will change!

write a gratitude list, if you do aa, aa online chat is always open. Listen to aa speakers, get to an in person meeting. At 2 weeks, you're a miracle! I made 4 months & trudging the road to happy destiny, one foot in front of the next. Best thing about aa in person support, we're all good at our jobs, you may find a good automotive mechanic!

Keep moving forward, you've come far from where you were when you came in here!

sugarbear1

If I can make 4 months, ANYONE can!

zorilla

You're so right;hmmm sex would be helpful too.Now should I get my husband or my boyfriend to help me out with that one?lol

stanleyhouse

You can do this, Zorilla. Just remember it is your body craving the booze. It takes a long time to get over a physical addiction. You may feel weak in the mind but there are chemical processes going on that are telling your mind that you need booze and pills. Keep strong, this is not about being weak willed, you are the bravest strongest person right now.

soberlicious

or both LOL, hey whatever works

zorilla

AHHH I'll have to go without.My boyfriend moved 8hrs away from me.My husband lives next door,but I'm not in love with him anymore...