living with alcoholic
KAB1960
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Butler, PA
Posts: 3
living with alcoholic
Hi everyone,
This is my first time in here. I am married to an alcoholic. He is what I guess most would call a "closet alcoholic". He works full time, 3 nights a week and the other nights he stays up all night drinking.
We have been married for 10 years and apparently before he knew me, he did this and his family says they thought he would "grow out of it". I knew nothing of his alcoholism until about 2 years into our marriage.
I feel he will never get help for this. He says he doesn't have a problem but I can tell he knows he has a problem but is probably embarrassed and is afraid everyone will know if he joins AA.
I feel he will never get help and I know I have to start living for myself. I guess I am here because I need to learn how to do that.
KAB1960
This is my first time in here. I am married to an alcoholic. He is what I guess most would call a "closet alcoholic". He works full time, 3 nights a week and the other nights he stays up all night drinking.
We have been married for 10 years and apparently before he knew me, he did this and his family says they thought he would "grow out of it". I knew nothing of his alcoholism until about 2 years into our marriage.
I feel he will never get help for this. He says he doesn't have a problem but I can tell he knows he has a problem but is probably embarrassed and is afraid everyone will know if he joins AA.
I feel he will never get help and I know I have to start living for myself. I guess I am here because I need to learn how to do that.
KAB1960
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Right here, right now!
Posts: 3,424
Welcome, though I am sorry for the reason you are here.
More will be along soon.
What helped me was the following
-getting an individual counselor
-joining Al-anon (which is for friends and family of people with problem drinking)
-reading a lot about alcoholism, addiction etc
I did not find out about my ex-husband's drinking concerns until we had known each other just about two years.
There is a saying called the Three C's which help a lot of people also
You did not cause this
You cannot control this
You cannot cure this
Again more will be along soon. As hard as it is for why I am here, I am grateful for the lessons I have learned in taking care of myself.
More will be along soon.
What helped me was the following
-getting an individual counselor
-joining Al-anon (which is for friends and family of people with problem drinking)
-reading a lot about alcoholism, addiction etc
I did not find out about my ex-husband's drinking concerns until we had known each other just about two years.
There is a saying called the Three C's which help a lot of people also
You did not cause this
You cannot control this
You cannot cure this
Again more will be along soon. As hard as it is for why I am here, I am grateful for the lessons I have learned in taking care of myself.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi KAB 
Welcome!
We also have a Family and Friends forum that you may want to look at as well
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
You'll find a lot of support here
D
Welcome!
We also have a Family and Friends forum that you may want to look at as well
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
You'll find a lot of support here
D
It's not easy living with someone who has a drinking problem. Definitely check out the link Dee gave you. You're not alone......
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