Drunk dad
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 9
Drunk dad
I'm am 22 and have been living at home for a couple years after living on my own for a bit and going to school.
He has been a drunk all my life and is emotionally abusive. Well, recently it's been getting bad again and I am about to snap. I am usually very good about keeping my temper and not letting him bother me but the atmosphere in this house is so toxic it is bringing me down so much because reasoning with him does nothing and usually starts huge family fights. My mom keeps talking about leaving him because he treats her badly too (which I think is a good idea) but she never does.
I want to move out but I just can't at this moment in time.
What are some ways to cope with this?
He has been a drunk all my life and is emotionally abusive. Well, recently it's been getting bad again and I am about to snap. I am usually very good about keeping my temper and not letting him bother me but the atmosphere in this house is so toxic it is bringing me down so much because reasoning with him does nothing and usually starts huge family fights. My mom keeps talking about leaving him because he treats her badly too (which I think is a good idea) but she never does.
I want to move out but I just can't at this moment in time.
What are some ways to cope with this?
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
I would consider going to Alanon meetings.
Your mother is codependent she also needs help, perhaps you can take her with you.
Obviously, the best answer is for you to move out and go about your life.
Read around these forums, it will help.
Your mother is codependent she also needs help, perhaps you can take her with you.
Obviously, the best answer is for you to move out and go about your life.
Read around these forums, it will help.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 144
Sorry to hear about your troubles, I can understand your pain living in that environment. You could entertain the idea of finding a healthy room mate and going that route. In the mean time do what you feel makes you happier, If its going to hang out at a book and or coffee shop.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Saltburn UK
Posts: 278
Al anon sounds like a good idea, it will give you more insight into the problem-and most importantly, help you to help yourself. I have recently started going because my partners behaviour sounds exactly like your dads. It has given me the resolve to ignore the abusive behaviour, and this has had far more effect than wanting the person to change.
The wisdom is that the addict will only change when they are ready, not because we implore them to. I wish you luck.
The wisdom is that the addict will only change when they are ready, not because we implore them to. I wish you luck.
I AM CANADIAN
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Niagara Region, Canada
Posts: 2,578
3C's
YOU did not cause this
YOU can not control this
and there is NO cure
glad you become so aware at a young age that there is more to this than it seems...yes, alcoholism is a family disease, we here are all effected by someone we love dearly has become effected by it...
Please take your mom and yourself to the wonderful meetings of AL ANON...the wisdom in those rooms with help YOU and your family....
keep coming back....keep trying and open your heart to the words of the room...also, so glad you found this place...
YOU did not cause this
YOU can not control this
and there is NO cure
glad you become so aware at a young age that there is more to this than it seems...yes, alcoholism is a family disease, we here are all effected by someone we love dearly has become effected by it...
Please take your mom and yourself to the wonderful meetings of AL ANON...the wisdom in those rooms with help YOU and your family....
keep coming back....keep trying and open your heart to the words of the room...also, so glad you found this place...
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