I don't have to fix her
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
I don't have to fix her
After a somewhat surprising length in a break-up, my 23-year-old and her ABF got back together. No surprise to me on that one.
He's spent the last year throwing at her that he wants to move back to Syracuse NY where he was raised, can make big bucks, yada yada yada. She has absolutely dug her feet in, refusing to up and transplant halfway across the country with him, and good for her!
Well I'll be damned if the railroad didn't offer him a huge increase in pay back in NY (he works for the railroad here), and he took the job. He leaves this Thursday.
She's devastated. She's in pain. This is the result of her choices in men, and although I am empathetic to her pain, I find myself allowing her to wade through that pain on her own.
I reiterated to her that a mother's love is constant and she will get through this like many other things in her life.
That's all that I can do, and what I wish to do. Even though I don't like to see her in pain, I know it's her pain to carry and deal with according to her life's choices.
I am so grateful to be coming from a place in my own recovery. It wasn't always that way, and many a time I attempted to "rescue" one daughter or the other.
On an unrelated note, I got all my paperwork/drug-testing completed through the temp agency, and will get the details on my job tomorrow!
He's spent the last year throwing at her that he wants to move back to Syracuse NY where he was raised, can make big bucks, yada yada yada. She has absolutely dug her feet in, refusing to up and transplant halfway across the country with him, and good for her!
Well I'll be damned if the railroad didn't offer him a huge increase in pay back in NY (he works for the railroad here), and he took the job. He leaves this Thursday.
She's devastated. She's in pain. This is the result of her choices in men, and although I am empathetic to her pain, I find myself allowing her to wade through that pain on her own.
I reiterated to her that a mother's love is constant and she will get through this like many other things in her life.
That's all that I can do, and what I wish to do. Even though I don't like to see her in pain, I know it's her pain to carry and deal with according to her life's choices.
I am so grateful to be coming from a place in my own recovery. It wasn't always that way, and many a time I attempted to "rescue" one daughter or the other.
On an unrelated note, I got all my paperwork/drug-testing completed through the temp agency, and will get the details on my job tomorrow!
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