Chuck48

Hello-

I've been anonymously reading these forums for the past few months, and I'm so impressed with how generous people are with their time and knowledge! I've picked up many good tips, but I decided to post in order to hold myself accountable for the promises I've been making (though not keeping) to myself.

I've been drinking for six years--sometimes daily, sometimes weekly. I never drive drunk, nor have I ever gone in to work drunk, but the alcohol is beginning to take its toll on my mental & physical health. The problem is that I have a security clearance, and it's very likely that I'd lose it, along with my job, if I entered treatment. I haven't told a single soul about my concerns, but I truly feel like my life would be drastically improved without alcohol. I weigh less than 110 pounds, and I regularly drink 750 mL of liquor over a two-day period. That can't be good for my body...or my wallet, for that matter.

Those of you who have recovered on your own, how did you do it? Any books you'd recommend? Phrases you'd tell yourself? Any other good online resources?

I haven't had anything to drink this weekend, which is a good start. The weekends are always the hardest for me. I've had no withdrawal symptoms whatsoever.

I'd greatly appreciate any feedback anyone can provide.

For anyone else who's new to recovery who might be reading this, one thing that has been helpful to me has been setting an alarm on my cell phone. Right after work is my most vulnerable time, so I've been setting a meeting reminder that says "Don't do it!" It's been keeping me honest!

Thanks :-)

Biza

I can understand exactly how you feel. I also feel I have to do it alone, for similar reasons. I was just accepted into a program that leads to my dream job. If anyone finds out that I have this issue then I will no longer be in the program.

I love the alarm reminder. Thats clever. I think I will try that one. That is also one of my worst craving times.

I have decided not to have any alcohol in my house. I will not face temptation when I am bored at night.

I also plan too drink a pepermint or herbal tea at night to replace drinking. I hope that will replace the feeling of consuming.

It will be interesting to hear some of the tips on your thread. Good luck.

Hevyn

Welcome to the family Chuck! So glad you found us. I don't have any specific tips - I sort of white-knuckled it because I was terrified of losing my life. I had been drinking forever, & in the end it was 24/7.

I did read "Under the Influence" & "Drinking-A Love Story" among others. I also wrote down all the reasons why my drinking had to end, things I'd done to embarass myself - health issues, etc. It was a long list.

I was told that since Alcoholism is a disease, you can't be fired for having it. My boss highly recommended I go into treatment because I had spun out of control - but he had to give me that option before considering letting me go.

Congratulations on having the good sense to tackle this now - before it creates chaos in your life. You have a great attitude. It does help to read & post here - keeps your fingers busy and you really do run across some amazing wisdom. You're never alone.

MycoolFitz

Welcome. I know you'll gain a great deal from reading and posting on SR, and with that, you already aren't doing it alone.

Chuck48

That's a really good idea. I'm so used to walking in the house and pouring a drink. Having a liquid alternative is a great suggestion!

Good luck to you. It sounds like you were accepted into a pretty prestigious program. If you could make it into the program, I'm sure you also have the strength to recover.

Soberpotamus

I recommend Sober For Good by Anne Fletcher and Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey.

Dee74

Hi Chuck!
Welcome

I wouldn't say I did it alone - SR has been an absolute integral part of my recovery - but I have no 'programme' as such...

In order not to bore people again this is a pretty good description of what I did...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post2531003

I know you'll find a lot of support here - good to have you with us on the posting side.

D

recoverywfaith

to SR.


Alot of good suggestions above...keep reading and posting and I hope you find the path that works best for you.

CaiHong

Welcome,
You have made the right descision. As I am reading and writing on this forum I am also listening to this website
On-Demand RecoveryTV Addiction Recovery Resources
You can download the podcasts, if I were you I would listen as much as possible to these broadcasts. I wish you the best on your recovery.
Cai Hong

SweetCityWoman

Hi Chuck - Welcome! I am at one year and have not shared the extent of my problem with anyone in my life - so I get where you are right now. SR helped me get to AA which really helped me break my routine in those early months. Then I replaced meetings with other activities - and I pushed myself to walk the dogs and take a yoga class. But I wasn't sitting home during vulnerable times doing nothing but think about drinking. Forcing myself to change things up was critical - no matter what I was doing (except drinking ofcourse).

I also took up tea - and I hated tea - never drank it. But I turned it into a hobby - got a special electric water warmer with temp. settings for different types of teas. I tried all sorts of teas - both caf and de-caf and then got a cool tea bag rack to organize my tea. Just one way of changing things up, breaking the old routines and finding new stuff to obsess about!!

You can do this - you don't need an army of people nor do you need to tell anyone in your life, but reaching out here on SR and doing a few months of AA was enough to launch my boat and I am still sailing.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

I'm glad you decided to stop drinking and to live a sober life.

I turned to books, which is what I always do in difficult times, and I had about three years of sobriety when I found SR. I have been here for 8 years now and I find so much inspiration, hope and love here, which have helped me a lot.

'The Seat of the Soul' by Gary Zukav was the book that turned things around for me. It's a gentle, loving book which encourages you to connect with your spiritual self.

tallcactus

I was a binge drinking, so quitting wasn't a physical problem.
I just took it "One day at a time."
I did use AA at the beginning and that helped to know there were people just like me and that I wasn't alone.
Coming here helps me to maintain my sobriety.
You can do this, already you have a few days without alcohol.

sugarbear1

Simply AA. I needed friends. And a program.

CarolD

The book that convinced me to quit was 'Under The Infuence" by Milam & Ketcham.
It also has a sequel "Beyond The Influence" that I have not read.
Amazon usually carries both...very inexpensilvely.
While not everything pertained to me a lot did ..it sure opened my eyes..

Welcome...

Terminally Unique

I recommend the following book for on-your-own recovery. It describes a method of recovery that does not require meetings, therapy, spirituality, or self-disclosure.

There is a thread on it in the Secular Connections Forum:

SSIL75

I also use AVRT and SR. Welcome!

Chuck48

Thank you for all the kind & helpful responses! I wasn't sure anyone would respond. I'm writing all of your ideas in a notebook. If I get the urge to have a drink, I'm going to review these suggestions. In the meantime, I'm going to check out some of the recommended books on Amazon.

Considering the amount I drank, I'm surprised I haven't had any withdrawal symptoms. However, my real work is going to be uncovering why I drank as much as I did...

ReadyAndAble

Welcome to SR! I'm glad you're here—and now posting.

sugarbear1

Try listening to aa speakers online. We aren't alone. The why is a brain/body problem. Enzyme or hormone and seratonin or dopamine discrepancy...Alcoholism. A disease. Typical people get a headache or stomach ache hangover. We create a tolerance and crave more and more after each time we drink...our brains also create reasons to drink...warped reality. A body-brain disease.

Terminally Unique

In my experience, the "why" doesn't matter too much. What matters is that you quit.