11 Days Sober
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 1
11 Days Sober
I'm not really sure where to start so I figure I'll just tell my story.
Since February 2010, my freshman year of high school, I've been doing drugs. I started out with pot which continued all the way until summer where I met my best friend who we'll call Joe. Joe comes from a poor family and a broken home his mom works all day so we always had his house to ourselves and his little sister. We used this time to do drugs all day. Once summer started me and Joe would smoke everyday together and began selling weed in addition to smoking it. We started dabbling in other drugs like LSD, Coke, heroin, and plenty of other drugs.
The killer for us was over the counter cough syrup which we got into sometime June 2010. It transported us both to another world. A crazy, delusional world where anything was possible. We went on so many amazing adventures and met some spectacular people while doing this. The catch was we were getting our syrup through shop lifting. It quickly turned into something we were doing everyday constantly going into the store and stealing cough syrup.
Things just kept getting crazier and crazier up until sometime in July when Joe's aunt finally put her foot down and told me I had to leave and he was grounded. Joe didn't like that idea and nor did I so we decided I'd leave and he'd run away and come hangout with me. We did this for about 4 days but eventually Joe's mom had to call the police because he's on probation. So with the police looking for him we decided we should go to my house (bad idea). My mom didn't take too kindly to the idea of us getting high constantly so she told him he had to go, but I just snuck him back in. Eventually she caught wind and went to Joe's house where the police happened to be along with Joe's mom who all went back to my house and arrested Joe and charged me with possession of paraphernalia for the pot pipe we'd been using.
They gave me a choice of writing an essay that they'd come back to collect tomorrow or take the charge. I stupidly decided that I didn't care and did a bunch of cough syrup the next day instead.
So I was charged and placed into a juvenile diversion program.
Me and Joe met up a week later after school had started and decided we were going to try Benadryl for the first time (biggest mistake I've made). I blacked out on it and was having seizures and was just entirely out of my mind. I was taken to the hospital and given Haldol to calm me down and then was promptly committed to a baker act. Next day turns out I'm allergic to Haldol as my Jaw is locking up, I'm seizing, and my throat is swelling shut I was once again rushed to the ER and was sure I was going to die. They intubated me and I fell into a coma for 3 days and stopped breathing on my own.
Luckily I came out alright but was put onto a steady regime of medication which made it so I was in a mental fog and unable to attend school. I was placed on homeschool.
So from August 2010 to April 20th 2011 I did not leave my house except to go to substance abuse treatment and legal appointments. I constantly thought about how good it would be to get high again and frequently drank and abused the valium they had given me.
April 20th 2011 I was released from the substance abuse program and the paperwork was being done to get me out of the juvenile diversion program. I didn't want to admit that I had messed up and felt that I just had bad luck. I stayed in constant contact with Joe throughout this time.
So I started hanging out with Joe again in May 2011 and began smoking once again and of course we decided we should begin stealing cough syrup again. This time was different and a thousand times crazier then last time we had done this. This time we had a group of about 6 of us that would go around stealing all the cough syrup and having drugged up adventures around the city and at Joe's house. Throughout this time I was taking alot of risks and even at one point got into the trunk of my friends car and he got pulled over and one of the people inside the vehicle had weed on them. This got back to the lady who was working my case and as such she forwarded it to the courts.
So we continued to do cough syrup everyday together. Me and Joe grew closer and closer and closer. I felt a connection to him I've never really felt with anyone I loved him like a brother. We did everything together at this point and were always together along with the rest of our crew. Day after day we stayed at Joe's going on adventures and trashing his house. It was disgusting. We began shoplifting in huge amounts clearing off entire shelves of DXM containing products and having to hit multiple stores to fuel our habits. We even began shoplifting things from Walmart that we didn't even need.
We were in this crazy parallel world where anything was possible, everything was amazing, and there was adventure around every corner. This continued until the end of June 2011 when Joe's grandparents had enough of his mom's inability to control him. So they came down one night and took him away to live with them for I don't know how long. I was left alone with the rest of the crew and continued to abuse drugs. I started doing Roxicet, Morphine pills, drinking, smoking, cocaine, and even tried Meth at one point. I was high everyday.
Then my replacement Joe whom we'll call Dan and I started to hangout constantly. Always doing drugs I started to stop having fun doing them but pressed on. There were some good times but most were bad. Then we started doing cough syrup again and shoplifting it. This continued until July 31st when I got into a fight with my grandfather and uncle while heavily under the influence of cough syrup. The police were called and I was baker acted and sent to a mental hospital. I stayed there until August 7th and was released back to my grandparents home. I took the time to think and I really do think it's time to reanalyze my life.
Now I whole heatedly consider myself a psychonaut, but I think I lost myself somehow in all of these drugs. I let them rule me and define me. I didn't look into anything else about the world or myself other then video games and books because that's all I knew. I got caught up in the popularity that comes so quick in the high school drug crowd and from selling drugs that I forgot the first rule of recreational drug use and that's respecting the substance I'm using. So now I'm in Rehab and will be for the next 8 months and as such I think it's time I do some sober exploring. Drugs are nice and fun but I know nothing about myself really. So during these 8 months I'm going to focus hard on my school work, explore my interests by going to museums, plays, aquariums, etc, spending more time with my father, getting into music production, learning how to play the sax. And probably a whole lot more.
I let drugs rule me and now I have to pay the price and admit I screwed up and that's one of the hardest things I have trouble doing but I'll pull through. I'm an extremely strong willed and resilient person. One day I'll return to psychonautics when I learn who I am, what I like, and where I'm going. When I'm well rounded and intune with myself. Drugs acted as liquid courage for me and now I'm literally left with nothing because I didn't respect the drugs or myself. I acted like an immature child.
Now I'm left with no friends other then Joe but I don't even know when he'll be back. I do nothing all day except for play computer and watch TV and go out with my father to do fun things. I never really learned how to be sober. It wasn't until High School that I even had friends or even left my house to hangout with them.
It's hard for my to admit this and I don't really feel comfortable with the substance abuse lady so I figure that I'd vent here and to my psychiatrist whom I'll be seeing soon.
I'm now 16 and it's my 11th day sober. It's going to be a long and uncomfortable ride, but I suspect that the final outcome will have made it all worth it.
That's my story, sorry for the wall of text.
Since February 2010, my freshman year of high school, I've been doing drugs. I started out with pot which continued all the way until summer where I met my best friend who we'll call Joe. Joe comes from a poor family and a broken home his mom works all day so we always had his house to ourselves and his little sister. We used this time to do drugs all day. Once summer started me and Joe would smoke everyday together and began selling weed in addition to smoking it. We started dabbling in other drugs like LSD, Coke, heroin, and plenty of other drugs.
The killer for us was over the counter cough syrup which we got into sometime June 2010. It transported us both to another world. A crazy, delusional world where anything was possible. We went on so many amazing adventures and met some spectacular people while doing this. The catch was we were getting our syrup through shop lifting. It quickly turned into something we were doing everyday constantly going into the store and stealing cough syrup.
Things just kept getting crazier and crazier up until sometime in July when Joe's aunt finally put her foot down and told me I had to leave and he was grounded. Joe didn't like that idea and nor did I so we decided I'd leave and he'd run away and come hangout with me. We did this for about 4 days but eventually Joe's mom had to call the police because he's on probation. So with the police looking for him we decided we should go to my house (bad idea). My mom didn't take too kindly to the idea of us getting high constantly so she told him he had to go, but I just snuck him back in. Eventually she caught wind and went to Joe's house where the police happened to be along with Joe's mom who all went back to my house and arrested Joe and charged me with possession of paraphernalia for the pot pipe we'd been using.
They gave me a choice of writing an essay that they'd come back to collect tomorrow or take the charge. I stupidly decided that I didn't care and did a bunch of cough syrup the next day instead.
So I was charged and placed into a juvenile diversion program.
Me and Joe met up a week later after school had started and decided we were going to try Benadryl for the first time (biggest mistake I've made). I blacked out on it and was having seizures and was just entirely out of my mind. I was taken to the hospital and given Haldol to calm me down and then was promptly committed to a baker act. Next day turns out I'm allergic to Haldol as my Jaw is locking up, I'm seizing, and my throat is swelling shut I was once again rushed to the ER and was sure I was going to die. They intubated me and I fell into a coma for 3 days and stopped breathing on my own.
Luckily I came out alright but was put onto a steady regime of medication which made it so I was in a mental fog and unable to attend school. I was placed on homeschool.
So from August 2010 to April 20th 2011 I did not leave my house except to go to substance abuse treatment and legal appointments. I constantly thought about how good it would be to get high again and frequently drank and abused the valium they had given me.
April 20th 2011 I was released from the substance abuse program and the paperwork was being done to get me out of the juvenile diversion program. I didn't want to admit that I had messed up and felt that I just had bad luck. I stayed in constant contact with Joe throughout this time.
So I started hanging out with Joe again in May 2011 and began smoking once again and of course we decided we should begin stealing cough syrup again. This time was different and a thousand times crazier then last time we had done this. This time we had a group of about 6 of us that would go around stealing all the cough syrup and having drugged up adventures around the city and at Joe's house. Throughout this time I was taking alot of risks and even at one point got into the trunk of my friends car and he got pulled over and one of the people inside the vehicle had weed on them. This got back to the lady who was working my case and as such she forwarded it to the courts.
So we continued to do cough syrup everyday together. Me and Joe grew closer and closer and closer. I felt a connection to him I've never really felt with anyone I loved him like a brother. We did everything together at this point and were always together along with the rest of our crew. Day after day we stayed at Joe's going on adventures and trashing his house. It was disgusting. We began shoplifting in huge amounts clearing off entire shelves of DXM containing products and having to hit multiple stores to fuel our habits. We even began shoplifting things from Walmart that we didn't even need.
We were in this crazy parallel world where anything was possible, everything was amazing, and there was adventure around every corner. This continued until the end of June 2011 when Joe's grandparents had enough of his mom's inability to control him. So they came down one night and took him away to live with them for I don't know how long. I was left alone with the rest of the crew and continued to abuse drugs. I started doing Roxicet, Morphine pills, drinking, smoking, cocaine, and even tried Meth at one point. I was high everyday.
Then my replacement Joe whom we'll call Dan and I started to hangout constantly. Always doing drugs I started to stop having fun doing them but pressed on. There were some good times but most were bad. Then we started doing cough syrup again and shoplifting it. This continued until July 31st when I got into a fight with my grandfather and uncle while heavily under the influence of cough syrup. The police were called and I was baker acted and sent to a mental hospital. I stayed there until August 7th and was released back to my grandparents home. I took the time to think and I really do think it's time to reanalyze my life.
Now I whole heatedly consider myself a psychonaut, but I think I lost myself somehow in all of these drugs. I let them rule me and define me. I didn't look into anything else about the world or myself other then video games and books because that's all I knew. I got caught up in the popularity that comes so quick in the high school drug crowd and from selling drugs that I forgot the first rule of recreational drug use and that's respecting the substance I'm using. So now I'm in Rehab and will be for the next 8 months and as such I think it's time I do some sober exploring. Drugs are nice and fun but I know nothing about myself really. So during these 8 months I'm going to focus hard on my school work, explore my interests by going to museums, plays, aquariums, etc, spending more time with my father, getting into music production, learning how to play the sax. And probably a whole lot more.
I let drugs rule me and now I have to pay the price and admit I screwed up and that's one of the hardest things I have trouble doing but I'll pull through. I'm an extremely strong willed and resilient person. One day I'll return to psychonautics when I learn who I am, what I like, and where I'm going. When I'm well rounded and intune with myself. Drugs acted as liquid courage for me and now I'm literally left with nothing because I didn't respect the drugs or myself. I acted like an immature child.
Now I'm left with no friends other then Joe but I don't even know when he'll be back. I do nothing all day except for play computer and watch TV and go out with my father to do fun things. I never really learned how to be sober. It wasn't until High School that I even had friends or even left my house to hangout with them.
It's hard for my to admit this and I don't really feel comfortable with the substance abuse lady so I figure that I'd vent here and to my psychiatrist whom I'll be seeing soon.
I'm now 16 and it's my 11th day sober. It's going to be a long and uncomfortable ride, but I suspect that the final outcome will have made it all worth it.
That's my story, sorry for the wall of text.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Seattle
Posts: 6
Hey BBM. Way to go on the 11 days. Try finding some activities to keep you busy and stay focused on staying off the drugs. From what I have heard that cough syrup is bad stuff. I applaud you for taking the first step and starting before it gets worse. We'll be looking out for you and take care.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,352
hi and welcome to SR BBM
I'm really sorry to ehar you've been through all that but it's great to hear you're thinking about doing things differently now, and at such a young age.
You'll find a lot of support here too
D
I'm really sorry to ehar you've been through all that but it's great to hear you're thinking about doing things differently now, and at such a young age.
You'll find a lot of support here too
D
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