July 18 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,360
July 18 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON
July 18 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
A phrase that turns up quite often in Al-Anon meetings is: “Yes, but…”
Member A is explaining how an Al-Anon idea can be applied to B’s problem. B, interrupting, says, “Yes, but…” and proceeds to show how different her case is, and how much worse than others, and that it couldn’t possibly be solved by anything as simple as applying a Step or a slogan, for example.
“Yes, but…” means she’s not ready to listen because she doesn’t want her problem underrated. She’s been living with it, and only she knows how awful it is. She overlooks the fact that we’re all there for the same reasons.
TODAY’S REMINDER
If ever I am tempted to say “Yes, but…,” I will remind myself to concentrate on what my Al-Anon friend is saying. If I’m sure I want to make my life more livable, I’ll listen with an open mind, and apply what I hear.
The key to Al-Anon is to accept and use the program without any of the “Yes, buts” that would reveal only my resistance and uncertainty.
“I will not resist the impact of a new idea. It may be just the one I’ve needed without being aware of it. I will make my mind more flexible and receptive to new points of view.”
A phrase that turns up quite often in Al-Anon meetings is: “Yes, but…”
Member A is explaining how an Al-Anon idea can be applied to B’s problem. B, interrupting, says, “Yes, but…” and proceeds to show how different her case is, and how much worse than others, and that it couldn’t possibly be solved by anything as simple as applying a Step or a slogan, for example.
“Yes, but…” means she’s not ready to listen because she doesn’t want her problem underrated. She’s been living with it, and only she knows how awful it is. She overlooks the fact that we’re all there for the same reasons.
TODAY’S REMINDER
If ever I am tempted to say “Yes, but…,” I will remind myself to concentrate on what my Al-Anon friend is saying. If I’m sure I want to make my life more livable, I’ll listen with an open mind, and apply what I hear.
The key to Al-Anon is to accept and use the program without any of the “Yes, buts” that would reveal only my resistance and uncertainty.
“I will not resist the impact of a new idea. It may be just the one I’ve needed without being aware of it. I will make my mind more flexible and receptive to new points of view.”
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 588
"If ever I am tempted to say “Yes, but…,” I will remind myself to concentrate on what my Al-Anon friend is saying. If I’m sure I want to make my life more livable, I’ll listen with an open mind, and apply what I hear."
Thank you. I needed to hear this today. I am not terminally unique!
Thank you. I needed to hear this today. I am not terminally unique!
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