puma7525

I am in love w a wonderful man who is a recovered alcoholic. He recently celebrated 7 years clean. Lately, he has been struggling w his sobriety & toying w the idea of trying to be a controlled social drinker.my heart breaks for him as I know he is going thru a really difficult time. I fear the road to drinking will lead to a path of destruction.I told him that I cannot support his idea to drink& that I wont stick around if that's what he decides.I did tell him to get back to aa & that I will always support his sobriety. He actually said that he couldn't promise me he wouldn't drink again, which of course hurt tremendously. After realizing how upset that made me, he agreed to go to meetings & followed thru today. I guess it probably wont be long to see whether or not he is just placating me. Am I handling this right? He is the most genuine loving man & I thought that for once, I had escaped a home w active addiction - I'm an acoa myself. Thanks for your time.

suki44883

I think you handled it beautifully. You didn't tell him not to drink, but you did let him know that you won't be in a relationship with an active addict. I can't think of a better way it could have been handled.

Welcome to SR!

LexieCat

I agree with Suki (as I mostly do). I can't think of anything else you could have said or done. I hope he is able to dodge this bullet. I've heard of 7 years being a rough time for a lot of folks--I suppose they get too far from their last drink and forget the misery they are letting themselves in for if they pick up again. I know some people come through these crises OK, and others do not. It's probably a somewhat hopeful sign that he is talking about what he's thinking, rather than trying to play head games with himself alone.

Welcome, glad you are here. If you aren't already going to Al-Anon, this might be a good time to start.

dollydo

Welcome, I also think that you handled the situation just fine.

Post when you feel the need, we are here for you.