MeredithD1

Hello Friends and Family of Alcoholics,

I normally do my best to lend a hand, to share my experiences of the past with others I see going through similar experiences, offer up my experiences as a way of lending a hand. I've always appreciated it when others were able to relate to me that way and help out, and I've seen that as being my way of returning the assistance.

I am sick for the third time since January of this year, which is unusual for me. I have learned that I am suffering adrenal fatigue, and the doctor has told me I need to de-stress in a major way, and I need to get more regular and deeper sleep (insomnia has been a problem on-and-off for most of my life). I've had two major illnesses in my adult life due to stress, and I don't want to be sick like that any more, ever.

I realize, with the help of meditations with HP, that I need to discontinue regurgitating the past, even with the best of intentions. I've done my inventory more than once and made amends where I could. The point of that was to be able to drop it and I haven't dropped it. By keeping it in my mind for any reason, I am opening doors that are better left shut.

At this point, I need also to be careful of what I read, so that I can recover enough. I need to keep things positive right now. I may need to skim some of what you write here to keep a distance from it for a while, and I probably need to stop bringing up my past altogether, but will offer the best support that I can offer because I believe you are worthy of the best I can give, even if it's just giving "Thanks" to a post.

Thank you for your understanding. Here's to health on all levels (emotional, spiritual, mental, physical), for all of us!

With Love.

Freedom1990

:ghug3

skippernlilg

Healthy is our #1 goal!! For you, for us, for our loved ones.

Get better soon!!!! :day6

LexieCat

Hey, Meredith,

I sure know what it's like to need a break. We all get burnt out and, yeah, it can affect our health.

Take good care of you and we'll look forward to your return!

Fandy

Adrenal fatigue is debilitating...you must be so exhausted. I hope you feel better soon. (deep restful sleep and turkey sandwiches)

if you feel up to it, google Mary Shoman? Showman? she runs a type of forum support group I think

dollydo

Sometimes we all need a break! Your health comes first, take care and know that we will miss you!

Hugs,

transformyself

Have you been tested for PTSD? There's a very big difference between just not getting over something and not being able to.

I only ask because that's what it sounds like to me, but I have it too, so of course I would think you do as well. It does sound like an anxiety disorder. Do you exercise?

MeredithD1

thank you for your lovely warm supportive responses - knowing you is truly a gift...
yeah on asking what is WRONG so many times! me too!

during my 2nd major stress-related illness, which lasted several years and included 3 years of horrid perimenopause during which I was surprised but grateful to not be anemic, I went into early menopause - the dr said about 10 years early according to my family history for me to be in full menopause; I was 47.

11 years, I can't even imagine and I am so sorry you are dealing with that! I did learn sometimes hypothyroid and adrenal have the same symptoms, and since your dr is looking right at that, I pray and hope for you to get answers and most of all R*E*L*I*E*F !!!

your symptoms sound similar - I have lost more hair than usual, and even with 6x/week vigorous exercise (evidently too vigorous, I found out this past week, for adrenal fatigue so I have to slow it down) and a food plan that took 2 years to hone, my weight loss is very very very slow and I have been on a plateau (up and down same 5 pounds) since March (when I got sick the 2nd time this year) and NOTHING will budge the scale - I SO hear you!! it's to the point I can't worry about my weight any more, just stick to eating nutrition that makes me feel healthy and avoiding the ever-growing list of foods I'm allergic/over-sensitive to. (I'm completely grain free, just gluten free wasn't enough) I'm on something called the SCD Specific Carbohydrate Diet which helps people with Crohn's, diverticulities, diabetes, IBS, and - interestingly - children with autism.

I'm STILL honing...this recent set of illnesses has me more sensitive to more things and I even had to stop taking the 11-year-old's dose that an 11 year old could do 4x/day but I was only doing 2x/day of children's benadryl for my allergies.

I have psoriasis on my scalp at the base of my skull that itches too. ARGH!

thanks for Women 2 Women - I will for sure check them out

I do have PTSD as well as anxiety and depression problems I have to monitor, and these contribute to the adrenal fatigue, making it even more important for me to de-stress. Oh I SO hear you on "not being able to" get over something; lately my "stinking thinking" and not being able to talk about the past without reliving it, has me more mired and that is what I need to address. Separate myself out from it for a while until I can address it "from a distance" i.e., without surrounding myself in the negative energies, too much like reliving it. The stress has broken down my ability to be able to safely address anything that needs addressing or releasing thoughts that aren't doing any good. So....I will Let Go and Let God - hand it up and know that HP knows more than I do about what I need, and let HP restore me to sanity.

You saw what I said about the exercise above - when I am able to start exercising again (I was forced to take a little over a week off due to this latest illness, a flu-bronchial type thing) I am going to do it more gently, more mildly - there are some beautiful parks around here and I am going to do some walking in them, plus yoga has been recommended and I have some moves that I know work well for me, so I will incorporate that into my life.

This I know for sure:

Health (mental, physical, emotional, spiritual) takes time and attention and is the most important thing in my life. Whatever It Takes!

thank you again, everyone, so much for your kindness - spiritually, it is a healing balm for my soul. emotionally, it is a balancer. mentally, it is a calming agent. <3 <3 <3 the physical will improve because of it.

lillamy

Meredith,

That was the diagnosis that made me realize that try as I may, being married to an alcoholic wasn't something I was handling "just fine, thanks for asking"...

A year later, I'm... God, I wish I could say I was better. My mental and emotional health is better; physically, I'm still a wreck.

Take care of yourself.

MeredithD1

Dearest Anvilhead, you are SO right! my H has been mostly out of work since Feb 2009 due to the economic situation in the trades, not anything else, and his weekly benefit went down by 2/3, so I "GET" the stress of that. Like you, I do our cooking, I put nutritious food on the table, so you and I are eye-to-eye on all that. And while intellectually, we know stressing out will not help, Well, it sure takes a lot of effort to maneuver all aspects of our selves into diminishing stress, doesn't it. Yeah I just try not to stress out about stressing out too much

MeredithD1

Ah Ralph!! Love his Daily Motivators we must swim in the same circles I am going to Things To Be Happy About as soon as I write this.

OK I was looking for this yesterday and I FOUND IT TODAY!

Dr. Mercola's web site is full of information - CHOCK full - TOO full sometimes - even for a research nerd like me.

Once I knew (or once I know) what I want/ed to find in there, and could resist following all the links to all the other articles unless I had/have a couple hours to sift through massive amazing health information - I found out, had I known about his site at the beginning of my two-year venture into "What can I really eat without feeling bad??" I would have saved - well, two years.

Take Control of Your Health With My Nutrition Plan

On this page is a link about halfway down for the NUTRITIONAL TYPING TEST - the link is in a yellow box with red lettering at the top of the yellow box that says, "Now Available Free!" It is a free online test/"quiz" you can take that will tell you what "type" you are. I can't really explain it very well, other than to say - PHENOMENAL and it makes sense, and it has been a huge benefit to me.

Without going on the plan that I got on, my current adrenal fatigue would be much worse - I know that - it has been in the past. I'm passionate about the value of this specific aspect of Mercola's site. Check out that quiz, see if it makes sense, try it out.

I do keep my doctor in the loop. I told him, "I live in my body 24/7. I see you a couple of times a year. So I believe it's in my best interest to be in touch with my body and know what it needs, know what makes it feel best." His response? A smile and "I agree!"

BTW I am tall so this weight loss will look like more than it is: once I started working out in late October, added to my evolution in diet, I released 20 pounds, probably comparable to your 10. And have plateau'd since March but not gained.

HERE's to YOUR HEALTH!!! and HAPPINESS!! and abundance of all manner of good things.

Fandy

In 2007 I began suffering a lot of problems you describe...I've been to this website too.

Ultimately I found out that my method of YAZ birth control affected my adrenals along with my mothers onset alzeimers that i was caring for her while working full time and living with a selfish fool BF ..who knew???? I used frequently order from a website..nutra-something? that sold adrenal support supplements i found very helpful....i will search for the name....did you check your eyebrows? are part of them missing?

MeredithD1

yes I did check my eyebrows - they are still growing in and would be unibrow without tweezing :P thank you! I actually picked that hint up from Suzanne Somers' work. Ya just never know where good info will be, LOL!

I've been taking New Chapter Supercritical Stress Advantage for about a year and recently added Terry Naturally Adrenaplex, a little over a month ago. I also do Lumina Cell Food in my 64+ oz/day of water, Lumina RNA/DNA spray (with very digestible B vitamins), New Chapter Omega fish oils, and Xiao Yao Wan that my Doctor of Acupuncture gives to me. I respond REALLY well to acupuncture and Chinese medicinals.

I am completely "sold" on iHerb.com, have been a regular there for years, go there after my research to get great pricing and free shipping I know, I sound like an ad. That's why I stopped writing reviews at amazon - people kept saying "obviously works for the company" or "sounds like ad copy"... frog 'em if they can't take a joke

I also do Source Naturals sublingual Gaba Calm, which is especially useful for sleep.

Last week, on a whim, I bought a kombucha mushroom tea drink, chose the flavor with ginger, lemon and raspberry, and it is doing some NICE things too. I feel better already...

Fandy

thanks for the information! i hope you feel better very soon...vacuum out the stress from your body.

MeredithD1

My AH, "J," has full time work for a month starting yesterday - first time since the end of 2008 he's had full time work (his boss he'd been with 4.5 years gradually ran out of work and shut down the company in Feb 2009). We know for sure the job will last a month - past that, we don't know - taking the good while we can, and I can see you understand that So!! Good news for both you and me, and a friend of mine whose husband has been dealing with the same situation (glazier, another trade!) just got a job with the CITY!! where they live!! this is good news for all 3 men and all 3 of us too

I wanted to mention - because money is an issue, I look around a lot to find the best bargains - I've been getting the Lumina products on Ebay where they are two thirds less than anywhere else if you find the right auction at the right time...which I do.

the New Chapter Supercritical Stress Advantage varies - sometimes least expensive at iHerb and sometimes Ebay and occasionally Amazon. NEVER least expensive at retailers, unfortunately. If something is less expensive at a physical vs online store, I'll do that.

I always order enough to get a good discount and free shipping from iHerb.

My husband does the D3 (D3 5000 by Metagenics from iHerb) and the New Chapter Omegas, with me, then separately, he does New Chapter Every Man, which I get from a separate site that is less than half the cost of anywhere else.

The Terry Naturally Adrenaplex is absolutely the best cost at iHerb - and they tend to run out of it - signs of the times!!!

barb dwyer

I agree with your strategy -
and Anvil get thee to the doc - that does sound very thyroid-ish!

(bf says take that with a grain of salt -
pun intended-
he thinks I thing everything is thyroid)

Well, it *is* - it's the carbureator - the gas pedal.

ANyhow - Meredith -
I call what you're describing 'carving down my world'.
I just have to make it into a size I can deal with.

One thing I did was the Norman Cousins thing -
I cut out 'drama' - films, books etc.
I only read comedy.
Only watch humor-oriented movies (of flat out fantasy)
No suspense no horror.

Had enough of that in real life.
No need to 'taste' it in my entertainment.

It made a tremendous difference.

SInce I'm an artist type
I also had to learn how to make my world 'linear'.

If something isn't going to 'go to pieces' until next week
I deliberately give myself 'today' to take 5 minutes and see if a plan comes
and if not - that's all it gets today.

Make sense?

All the things in my world were pressing in on me at the same time
and I had to learn to find the 'due date' for them.
It really helped me not only deal with 'stress'
but it also made things that were always 'beyond' my control
suddenly...manageable.

So good for you - carving the world into manageable bites.

Also
the 'creative' energy
is the most healing energy we can generate
to heal ourselves.

SO I oriented my 'humor' and 'fantasy'
toward those things that made me want to make something.

That energy flow running
through the body helps it heal as well.

MeredithD1

Yes, Barb, on "carving." Thanks for that! I like identifying processes with words, and sometimes, that's difficult when I'm in the middle of the process Thanks for the words. Awesome!

speaking of words and art...

I have started working on my book again - the one I've been writing since 1967 - actually not that "one" but again I've changed direction -

namely because the book I've been working on (not much) for the past year is about my former job in television research - I'm an insider, whistle-blower - and I learned when I picked it up a couple of weeks ago that it is way too stressful for me to do it in book form - it gets me really pistoff rather quickly

I figure I'll get back to salon.com and blog about it some more. I submitted the blog idea to the Huffington Post - who knows, they may be interested. Maybe not. My interest in it doesn't hang on who else cares Either way, it's doable.

I think a blog, taking it in little chunks, would be less stressful than trying to lay it out in a book form. If not, I'll drop it for now. No Stress. Mellow. Ahhh. is my priority now.

The book I started day before yesterday is about how I got on my spiritual path and I find that writing it in this long book format is very bright and sunny for me - so - onward!!!

I love the smell of baking bread too, Anvil!! it is ZEN. I make cookies with organic raw cocoa butter, honey and almond "flour" (almond meal). It's a recipe I got from the SCD and it's wonderful. I'm not only gluten free but completely GRAIN free - has really helped ease up my intestinal issues.

(Warning: Gross intestinal stuff in next paragraph)

Now if only I could find something that would get rid of the 'roids! sorry to bring up something that's such a pain in the a$$ (Yeah, THAT joke has never been made before!!) I first had them when I was 3!! I had a 'roidectomy in the late 90's and not only did they come back within a year but they came back more toward the outside, which is actually WORSE, IMHO. At least the "additional PPO" plan I pay a lot for through Medicare has, this year, included the colonoscopy with only a copay - last year it was $150 because it was considered to be "Outpatient Surgery," and I was like, "Yeah? With WHAT?? do I pay for that??" So I'll go in for one of those soon and then there's some relatively new procedure that can be done in my dr's office where he applies an electric zap or something - not pain-free but then again, I've had the 'roidectomy and he agrees that is DEFINITELY more painful. Anyway if anyone has any 'roid removal success stories, I'm all ears - and you can PM me and I'll keep your privacy. Thank you!

(End of Gross intestinal stuff in previous paragraph)

Fandy

I believe the colorectal surgeon would use a laser to remove and it is "supposed" to be relatively painless, outpatient procedure or same day surgery. a pain in the arse, no pun intended.

I finally found the name of the website i used to order from.."Nutri-meds.com"..Adrenal Cortex supplements.

MeredithD1

I believe there's a trade-off. In some ways, we don't feel as good as we used to, and in other ways, we're better than ever. (there HAS to be some advantage to aging ) BTW - I'm also 51 - yet another thing we have in common

11 years of perimenopause! OMG... sorry...
I thought things would be different, too.

re: vacation - I understand. I wish you could go somewhere exotic for a couple of months and just really recover. and then not have to go back to work. 20 years! OMG that's incredible. The longest I held a job in my 22 years in the workplace was 3 years. I used to be ashamed of that, and now I just see...it was what it was...BUT CONGRATULATIONS on 20 years!! Yea for you!!! That's a great accomplishment. (Long distance pat on the back.) I bet that it has to have been challenging more than once, and felt like a rut sometimes?? hey there's no 100 percent solution, is there.

I can back that up for you. My mom was on synthroid from way back as long as I can remember, and she used to get spasms of the esophogas. She was using Mylanta when it could only be had by prescription. She was rushed to the hospital a few times with those attacks. WOW. I didn't know that research was revealing a connection. Very interesting!!

I never would have thought that of you anyway, not from your posts that I've read. And I can relate - as I researched and began taking care of my own health, I know it could seem to others that I was making it all up, or something. I eventually got to the point where I didn't care - it was my body, I was the one in it, and regardless of what others thought of the way I took care of my health, it was mine to take care of. (So THERE )

keep that vision - you still may get it - things change - the economy is picking up a bit - hang in there woman - you just never know - (I'm shining a light from the end of the tunnel for you.)

No matter if the doc says the tests don't show anything - keep at it - you know what you know!!

hugs your way!!!!!! I'm so glad we have this board to share!! :day6

ANEWAUGUST

Wow...is the universe trying to tell me something?

I log onto this forum, and I see a thread titled adrenal fatigue.

Guess who has an appointment in the morning for testing to see if I am suffering from adrenal fatigue or hypothyroidism? Thats right, moi!

Anvil, I think we connected on a thread before about perimenopause and the W2W program in the womens forum.

I just want to second that emotion. I am tired of being tired. I have much to do, and no energy to do it with.

I too am trying to except a little extra padding around the middle, yet, I feel if I had just a smidge more energy I could make some progress in whittling a bit of this weight away. I too feel that I am the rock of reason for home, work, and my mother as she is transitioning thru widow hood and closing her business..I am afraid this rock is holding me down.

Oh yeah...and I get to watch my hubby drink a beer tonight., which is the icing on this cupcake of a day..