anaserene

So, it's been about 1/2 year since I first came here desperate for help in dealing with my little brother (Adderall abuse, psychosis, mental hospital). I distanced myself because I couldn't take it anymore. The wonderful people here in this forum helped me sooooooo much. I am eternally grateful.

I'm back because I am afraid for what might happen in the next month or so. His lease runs out Tuesday and our father is going to pick him up and bring him back to the NYC area. His abuse pattern coincides with going there. Since I knew how much stress this causes our Dad, I offered to let my brother stay with me. The plan is for him to go to college at the end of August, but he needs to live somewhere until then.

I expect him to start living with me around July 23/24, but who knows what trouble he can get in during the week and one half he will be near NYC. I'm bracing myself, but I really can't let myself get stressed because I am trying to conceive. So, I'm here to vent and to ask for the support that many of you gave me when I was here before.

Thank you all.

Freedom1990

Do you have any boundaries in place for when he does come there to stay?

I'm just afraid he's going to walk all over you. Is he still active in addiction?

anaserene

I have no idea where he is at with his addiction. I have boundaries, but I haven't had a chance to communicate them to him. In fact, I don't think he knows that he won't be allowed to stay at our dad's for the entire rest of the summer. As soon as I am able, I will let him know the rules which are the same as when he was here last summer: no drugs & he has to look for work.

Freedom1990

It sounds like you are preparing in advance, which is good!

When my youngest daughter ran away and was placed in foster care, I had to have a behavioral contract written up before she could come back home. It made very clear the boundaries, and what the consequences were should she cross a boundary.

It sure made things a lot easier in the long run.