peanut21

This is all so crazy. I got a phone call from my brother tonight saying my husband called him crying to tell him he is thinking of ending his life because me and the kids would be better off without him and he don't know how to fix things. My brother who has been clean and sober for 6 years told him "I am the wrong person to call unless you want to hear the truth" He said get off the drugs and alcohol and talk to my sister and try to work through this or get out. I really don't know what else was said my brother just said that he whined some and told him thanks for listening.

Also, my son called and said he had talked to his wife about me and the kids coming there and it was not an option. I guess they live on base and she is not interested in having his family living with them. That is fine I understand that being newly married with a baby on the way. He apologized to me and said he should have talked to her first. I know he just wants what is best for me and his brothers. I told him I was working on a way to get out it would just take me a little time. I am going to keep calling and researching everything I can. In the morning I am going to go to the housing athourity and check into the section 8 thing and see what I can find out. I will also be talking to family services.

As I said before I will not give up I can do this I will find a way.

hurtbeyondbelie

Peanut21:

Good for you. Congrats on taking steps to free yourself from his chaos. Its hard to do but you deserve it!!! Take it easy!!

Kindeyes

That is the kind of mindset that will get you what you need. Once you have made the commitment to make things better for yourself....things that you never dreamed could happen will begin to happen.

And you have all of us here cheering you on and giving you encouragement to do what you need to do for you.....to make your life better.

gentle hugs
ke

MsPINKAcres

Still sending PINK HUGS and positive thougths your way!
Rita

MissTara

Im sorry to hear that there is no longer an option to go live with your Son, but I am proud of you for keeping your chin up & looking for other resources. Dont let a few *no's* discourage you! I will also continue to send you good luck vibes!

laurie6781

Okay, here are some suggestions. Go BACK to the Welfare Department (not sure what they call it in LA, here it is Income Support, lol) and APPLY for:

Temporary Assistance
and
General Assistance
AFDC for under age child(ren)
Medicaid for you and child(ren)

Bring whatever you can to show AH is an addict and IS NOT LIVING IN HOME NOR CONTRIBUTING ANYTHING TO THE SUPPORT OF YOU AND CHILD(REN).

Department of Children & Family Services | State of Louisiana

State of Louisiana Welfare Program Eligibility Requirements | eHow.com

Then at that time you can also put in the application for Section 8 housing (contingent upon you getting General Assistance).

Contact all Churches in your area including Catholic Charities.

Contact Salvation Army and/or Vincent St Paul Charities (they both can sometimes help with food/clothing/utility assistance.

If you have a vehicle or someone that will give you rides, contact all food banks within a 50 mile radius.

Hope some of the above can help you to get some of the assistance you so desperately need.

BTW if AH should call you threatening suicide, call 911. He will quickly learn that if he is serious he will be put on a 72 hour hold, and if he is not serious he will still be put on a 72 hour hold and will not try that 'manipulation' technique again.

Please keep posting and let us know how YOU are doing as we do care so very very much.

Love and hugs,

MsPINKAcres

((peanut))

Laurie has some great suggestions here -

But since we live in the same area I feel I need to share some truths with you so you will know what you are really facing, This is my experiences tho as sad as it is to say The 72 hr hold will not be for 72 hours. It will only be for maybe 12 hours at the most.

Because of the horrid system - they will only hold the person until stable condition is met - if they are under the influence - the hospital/facility will only keep them until they are able form a comprehendable conversation. The facility may offer them rehab but they Won't push it. Even if it is a suicide attempt.

Section 8/housing assistance has a waiting list that is over a year long wait - if you go thru the Women's Shelter - you will have a much better chance of getting something faster (which is why the waiting list is so long - ppl are constantly being bumped down)

The LC Women's Shelter offers a lot of assistance to families ~ especially free legal consultation to help you know where you stand with LOUISIANA's horrid laws concerning community property!!!

I hope to be at the meeting I told you about on Saturday ~ I hope you can make it too!

PINK HUGS,
Rita

peanut21

Well I don't even know where to start but my husband was taken to the hospital last night. They are talking about keeping him for 15 days. It was supposed to be the 72 hour hold I really don't know anything at this point. He came home last night with my son driving because he could not. After 10 min of waiting for him to come in the house I went to check on him he was falling all over the house holding him up. He went into the house and a few min later the police showed up I guess one of the neighbors saw him fall in the ditch and he was not able to get up he tried several times and then the last time he just laid there so they called. I showed the officer the text saying he wanted to kill himself and they found some drugs on him and in his car which in his state he gave them permission to search. Which by the way was fine with me. Not long after an ambulance showed up and took him away. Now this morning he calls me said he lost his job, blaming me for calling the cops and the ambulance and wants all his stuff moved to his mom's (Whatever). Says all of this is my fault when I know it is not. I know tomarrow is the first not sure what the kids and I will do rent is due no later than the
5th so we will probably be evicted. I am working on something today. Not sure how far I will get but keeping my head up as best I can. Just hurts to have him blame me for everything. I don't know how long they will keep him but I guess we will see.

((MsPinkAcres)) I was planning on going to the meeting on Friday but I think with all this I have a couple of appts then I will wait until Sat. I am not sure if I know where it is as I am not familiar with that area but I am going to try and find it. I had planned on going last night but as you can see that did not work so well.

MissTara

I am glad you are trying to keep your chin up, I really hope he is ok. Please do not let it bother or hurt you that he has been blaming you for everything, it just hurts himself worse to blame himself, and he knows this. You just brush that blame right off of your shoulders!!

I will be sending you good vibes on finding a way to stay in your current home or finding a new one, and I hope that I am not out of place when I say this to you but....he wants his stuff moved into his Moms? Well then I would consider that as an oppertunity that is knocking.

Take care of you....

peanut21

At this moment I really want to scream at his mother. She just does not get it this is all about him, him, him. I try to tell her look what he has done to everyone else. Where he is at now he is safe, away from drugs, gets 3 meals a day and is getting clean and sober at least for the moment. So what about me and the grandkids and not having a place to live or a vehicle? That is not important right now to her him getting better is the important thing and we can worry about the rest later. WHAT? She is nuts and in denial and making me crazy. Why can't she see she is not helping him in anyway. She is more worried about him having toothpaste and a clean pair of shorts. What you think they are going to do to him up there if he doesn't have toothpaste kick him out? I am sorry just very upset and frustrated that all she can see is him and his needs and that to her all I thing about is me, me, me. No I am thinking about me and my kids and our situation. I tell her she does not live in the situation daily. She says oh I lived with 2 at the same time I know what you are going through. No you don't you bought there cigarretts and beer, paid all their bills and made them take no responsibility. You would ship them off to me or other people because your husband would NOT put up with it or you went and stayed at the weekend place. I just want to scream. I thought him going would help my stress level a bit but she is making me nuts.

MissTara

If your contact with his mother is having such an impact on you, there is always the option of limiting your contact with her. I dont know how often she sees the kids you share with your AH, but if someone was affecting me that way, I would have nothing to do with them unless absolutely necessary.