pmdrinker

Hi all,

I havent ever looked into support for my drinking problem officially. I am aware its a problem by the routine I am in, which is come home from work, keys and wallet on the table and crack open a cold one.

Im 32 engaged and I have a young teenager. I have a good job. Everything is strong in my world except my dependancy on grog and cigarettes.

My lady doesnt smoke and barely drinks at all. We have talked about both my dependancies but never in a clear rational way. Its usually either in an argument (when im sober or not) which has never been productive.

Right now I have just finished by 8th drink of a brown spirit and its only Tuesday. I feel sober but I know I'm not functioning as well as I should be.

Standard night is 10-15 standard drinks at a minimum. Weekends even more.

I will not bore you with many more details of my story as thats probably enough background.

What I hope to gain by joining and posting in this forum was to gain some knowledge and techniques to tackle the problem I am having. I would like to say I would be able to have an occasional beer with the family at christmas but from what I have seen (mainly in movies) that is not even an option for someone who has this problem.

Im embarrassed to admit to anyone I have a 'problem' with drinking but I know its true. My partner is aware of my 'habbits' and I would like to do this for myself, my child and my family.

I am hoping for some direction to techniques and options to combat this so I stop wasting money and years off my life.

Hopefully I am doing this right as I havent spent any time on here just a couple of reads of the odd post.

First post on the road to a new life. I hope I can get the help I need and perhaps I can help someone else in years to come.

cheers.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

I'm glad you found us.

It sounds like you're ready to stop drinking and there is lots of support here. It's always a good idea to talk to your dr before you stop drinking, because detoxing from alcohol can be dangerous.

I think the best advice I can offer is to be aware that stopping drinking is the beginning. The hard work of recovery begins at this point. Most of us drink to avoid dealing with our emotions and we need to work through those feelings to be able to recover and move on.

You're right that you will not be able to take an occasional drink if you're an alcoholic. One drink is never enough, as you probably know.

I hope you keep reading around and posting.

least

Welcome to the family. When I gave up drinking for good 18 months ago I didn't know how I'd live without alcohol. Now I can't understand how I lived that miserable existance so long.

EmeraldRose

Welcome pmdrinker.
Glad to hear you feel you want to change. There really is life after booze -and its good. I quit almost 5 months now after over 30 years of that nagging disease. Hopefully, you gain the wisdom and strength you need from this site -it has been a godsend for me to stick on in times of despair.
Wishing you peace and strength.

pmdrinker

thanks all.
i checked out a chat room and the people were awesome.
im not into the GO TEAM environment if that makes sense.

just a bit of talking and sharing.
a very warm environment to step into.

i might come back tomorrow after work instead of having my first one.

cheers guys.

EmeraldRose

That might be a good idea. *wink*

Northrop

PM drinker,

Do you get withdrawals during the day before you drink?

artsoul

Welcome pmdrinker - I'm glad you're here. I can relate to your post - over the years I went from a weekend drinker to drinking a bottle of wine most nights. It got harder and harder to be "functional"...... Everything was fine on the outside, but alot of days I felt like I was just hanging on, waiting until I could have that first drink.

None of us wanted to give up alcohol entirely. It was scary even thinking about it. I had to keep my focus on just staying sober for that day, one day at a time, and not think about the next day or the weekend, holiday, whatever. Sometimes it's enough just to get through the next minute or hour. It's great though, when you get to the point where you can go for weeks or months without feeling the temptation.

If we can do it, so can you!!! :ghug3

Programmatic

It is the great obsession of every alcoholic to want to believe that he can control and enjoy his drinking. It was by this obsession that I did much damage to myself and those around me.

This was a serious issue for me as well. Fortunately, in meetings I had no issues admitting my defeat to others in the same predicament. Today, I am much more open and frank about my condition but earlier into it I told no one except people in meetings. The first hurdle for me was admitting to myself that the drinking was definitely the problem.

Those are noble sentiments and the hallmark of a loving husband and father. I found out, however, that the only person recovery could be engaged for was myself. Others have certainly directly benefited from my recovery but the sole reason I do it is my own spirit. For me, doing it for any other reason removes the focus from the one reason that counts. Additionally, I am removed from any expectations for what my recovery can or should do for others.

Kjell

Hi PM-

Welcome to Sr.

I too was a "PM" drinker, except when it turned into 12:01am then I really got going

We can and do recover. That is a fact.

Kjell~

instant

Hi pmdrinker
you have taken a big step forward. My issues have been similar to yours. I am 30 days sober today, it has taken me a long time to get here. Rather than focusing on giving up something "held dear" I find it helps to think of it as a new private adventure. The first week is the hardest in terms of 'withdrawal"

eveydaynew

Hi PMdrinker

I woke up without a hangover today, first time in five days, I spend yesterday with this site turn on at work and I did not stop at the bottle shop on the way home from work. Last night all i could think was how proud i would be to tell everyone here that, so it working for me. I really Hope it works for your.

Dee74

some great advice here already pmdrinker so I'll just say Hi and welcome!

D

pmdrinker

no not at all.

its just as soon as i get home im ready for one then two then 10 then bed.





thanks all some positive comments.

see ya all around here im guessing.

PaperDolls

Welcome PMdrinker! So glad you found us ... .keep coming back!! There is hope!

BinaryNomad

PM,
I am an after work drinker as well. I moved from on the weekends to occasionally during the week and then spend years drinking every night after work. Welcome to SR and I look forward to chatting with you in the future.

-BN
.

Derrick41

When my daughter was younger she joined girl guides. A friend down the street wanted to join also, it cost $2 every wednesday to go. The girls parents said no to her. My wife and I were shocked. One wednesday night I was driving my daughter to girl guides and we passed by the young girls house. What I seen was the Dad take a 24 of beer out of the trunk. It was a deep moment in my sobriety. That 1 case of beer could of sent his daughter to girl guides for the season. Booze is not only your problem, step back and take a deep look at who it also affects. By the way, that young girl is now pregnant at 17. You are doing the right thing coming here. The chat room is great if you need instant encouragement.

AlcoAbroad

Hey PMD!

Remember your first chat on SR when you had just registered a few days ago? I was on Day One and you'd just made your first step by joining the wonderful SR community.

Day Four just started for me a couple of hours ago and you've already made my day! I've been wondering if you'd decide to take things further after our chat. I had a funny feeling you were going to get serious and I'm over the moon that this is the case!!

You might wonder why your decision to do domething about your drinking should help me in my own journey. Well, when you 'take the plunge' that's a reinforcement to me of my own decision. You'll definitely understand when you're on your own journey.

I wish you well, PMD, and look forward to chatting again one day soon. You're doing a great thing and it's good knowing you're now enjoying the superb camaraderie of the great people here on SR. They've helped me and I know they'll help you too.

Good luck!
AlcoAbroad

Zebra1275

Welcome. Keep coming back.

pmdrinker

hey alcoabroad...

thanks.
glad you are going strong.


this site has been at the forefront of my mind since joining.

not sober but i can feel the shift already.

i am going to keep trolling these waters and work towards a date like we talked about. hopefully my date can be brought forward like yours.

this place is an eye-opener. the encouragement and positive reinforcement is unbelievable so far.

i see good things for me very soon.