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The Insanely Short Memory (ISM).

Old 05-17-2011, 06:55 AM
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The Insanely Short Memory (ISM).

Hi Everyone,

I have been thinking a lot lately, and for some reason my mind keeps wandering towards proving to myself again that I am in fact an alcoholic. I have plenty of proof that I am and have written a lot of it down so I can look at it when I need to, but I still catch myself thinking about making a plan. When I think about this, I think, I should go out with a plan to just have a drink or two and see what happens. Coming from an educational background of predominantly chemistry I think in my head that if I am really an alcoholic that instantaneously I would be slamming a bottle that night due to the "allergic" reaction. This, in my personal experience, was not the case but sure enough whether it was a couple days, a week, or a month I would be back to drinking to blackout and drinking in the morning to calm my nerves and "cure" my anxiety. It just blows my mind how fast my ego can repair itself and think that it is a good idea to go back to something that brought me to my knees!! Anyway, I don't plan on doing this (in case anyone was going to ask) but I just thought I would throw this out there because it has been bothering me. I know that in my heart that alcohol only brought destruction, lying and problems into my life but these sirens are really good at what they do.
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Old 05-17-2011, 07:13 AM
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Yea I used Rational Recovery techniques in my recovery and it helps me to identify that as my 'alcoholic voice'. It's the alcoholic in me trying to talk myself back into drinking. Learning to identify (and ignore) that was very powerful. The tool is called AVRT. You can google it (it's free but the site has some commercial content so we're not allowed to link it here).
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Old 05-17-2011, 01:11 PM
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'Playing the tape through to end' was a useful technique for me.

It's easy to conjure rosy images of ourselves having fun with drinking...it's worthwhile though to force yourself to play those scenes through to the end, and look at the consequences of our drinking...to see the reality of what alcohol does to us.

Having posts here that I could refer back to helped me a lot too

D
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Old 05-17-2011, 01:23 PM
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Every time I start to get those thoughts I think back to detoxing or my last anxiety attack, that usually changes my thinking in a hurry.
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Old 05-17-2011, 01:29 PM
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I'm interested in the allergic reaction. It's something I've heard about on here, but I'll tell ya, I had noticed that when I would wake up hungover, if I had an Allegra I would be able to breathe better.

What is the allergy theory? Are non-alcoholics not allergic?
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Old 05-17-2011, 01:50 PM
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The allergic reaction is to alcohol, not a season allergy or something that Allegra will relieve. The theory is that once an alcoholic metabolizes alcohol that the body craves more of the same where as a "normal" person would usually get a slightly out-of-control nauseous feeling and believe that they have had enough. This reaction, therefore, causing the alcoholic to drink to excess at the point of consumption. Which is why the first drink is too many and then a thousand is never enough (sorry I don't like to use slogans/sayings, but it fits here).
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