Babez

Where to begin..I come from an alcoholic famliy,first got drunk when I was 5.There was blue maui left out and I thought it was kool-aid.Had my first beer when I was around 14,had a "healthy" (or healthy as it can be!) relationship with alcohol,like a beer here and there until I turned 21...then it all went downhill.I started like anyone else,beer on the weekends,then it went to a weekend plus 1 day,plus 2 days etc...Was partying with my dad and my family,I felt I HAD to now that I was legal.I would say the past 2 years (im 23 now) have been the worst.My favorite poison was Vodka,about half a liter a night,every night,sometimes 3/4 of the liter,always shots starting at 5pm.If I didn't have vodka it was yellow tail wine (13% alcohol) the big bottle or I would get 12% beers and down about 3-4 16 ounces cans.I would drink until the alcohol was gone or until I passed out.I had 2 seizures (I have previous epilepsy but 2 seizures that i'm certain were caused from drinking) Sorry this is long,I needed to tell someone....my husband knows I drank a lot but doesn't know the real amount,i'm ashamed.I was sober for 2 weeks then my dad came to visit and we binge drank together for a week.Today is my 2nd day back to being sober.Anyone in my same boat? Could use someone to relate to Thanks for listening!

Bikeguy

It's a disease and it will steadily get worse until it kills you. The great thing is there is a way to stop it....by not drinking. Only you can break the cycle, good job on making the decision and day 2. Keep up the good work and keep reading and posting on SR it's a great place for help and support.

Welcome!

Dee74

Hi Babez

I think a lot of us can identify with your post

I think support is vital - I knew drinking was killing me but I still took every opportunities to drink - having support, and a place to come to when we feel vulnerable, can make us stop and think about those bad decisions, and hopefully break the cycle

I think with seizures you probably have even more at stake than most.

Have you thought about real life support - AA or some counselling perhaps?

It would also pay you to see your Dr seeing as you have other health issues as well.

It's not easy and it's a lot of hard work, Babez, but you'll find a lot of support here

D

least

Welcome to the family of SR! You've made a smart move reaching out for support to stop drinking. I gave it up over a year ago and it's the best thing I ever did for myself. I hope you find as much support here as I have. THis site has been a lifesaver for me.

:ghug3

Anna

I'm glad you found us!

nandm

Welcome to SR!

opmloser

Babez-There are a ton of great people on this site who can relate to you and I'm one of 'em. Please read through the threads, it is great therapy and you will know that you're not unique and definitely not alone! Alcoholism is a medical disease, not a moral one, and the shame you feel now will turn into pride once you've got a little sober time...you'll see, I promise.
Take the advice of the good people on the board; google AA meetings where you live and GOGOGO. You know, the next time your Dad comes for a visit and sees you chugging bottled water/cola instead of booze, you might just get him to open his eyes about his drinking.
Welcome to SR and keep coming back!!

BHF

Welcome to SR. I can definitely relate with where you are at, I only wish that I had been able to actively seek help and have a real desire to change at the age of 23. I commend you for that and wish you the best.

Zebra1275

Yeah, I can identify. Vodka will eventually kill you, but first it will make you suffer and be miserable for many years.

Babez

Thank you all for the encouraging words.I cannot express how much I LOVED those 2 weeks sober,I didn't want it to end but my dad was there pressuring me and I stupidly gave in thinking "it's just one more time" but it turned into a week! Clearly it's never "just one more time." I'm looking forward to my new clean life,I have a wonderful husband and 2 amazing kids (6 and 4 this summer!) that need me and want me healthy I have finally realized that alcohol is just not worth it anymore and to think before I act (that's a new one! haha) Thanks again,I will definitely be frequenting here

artsoul

Congratulations on your decision to live sober! You're so right about alcohol not being worth it.... I didn't have any huge consequences, but it took away my ability to have a simple, responsible life and enjoy the little things.

Stick around - this is a great community!

topspin

Babez,
Welcome to SR; ....can totally relate to where you're at.

You'll find a ton of support here. And you've got a beautiful life ahead, ...sober.

Hang in there,

TS