beckkkk

I am feeling so stupid and down. When I say stupid, I mean VERY stupid.

You see, I had been doing NC with my ex. I was doing very well and then I got a text. I replied and we communicated for about 1 week. Then reality set in again.

We are newly divorced. I finally got a copy of what property he wants. He wants...well, basically everything! I am so livid. I am the one that worked, I am the one that paid all the bills, I am the one that took care of everything financial while he laid around gorked! He paid for nothing. Now I know he won't get everything but just the fact that he has the nerve to ask for it infuriates me. Who does he think he is??? This is the same man who said he would fix my leaking roof in 2010. My homeowner's insurance paid him over $600 for work he never did. He blew the money(on alcohol and pills no doubt) and I am left with a leaky roof.

When confronted with this(something else I knew better than to do), he claims he did this to be funny. FUNNY? This is a legal issue buddy! I do not find it funny!

Yep, I have fallen face down in the addict cesspool once again.

I am trying hard not to be too down on myself. I am telling myself it is a learning experience. I have restarted NC....and praying.

Thanks for listening.

tam

beckkkk...your not stupid! things like this can happen, we slip. but look at what you have accomplished and recognized and wont tolerate anymore, your strong and smart...its just a slip..
Im divorced now too, 2 days later my ex called to ask if he could see his baby girl (dog) I said sure someday, he said this weekend? I thought for a sec..then said no, I dont know when..but I almost slipped!

I too am hurting financially as well because of him, he didnt contribute to the household in 6 years and yet I had to settle according to this state divorce laws...didnt matter.

I will be struggling for a few years, there is no question about that, but you know what?? he cant do it again to me!!!

think of this as closure, think of this as a way to be thankful for what we have, even if its going to cost us, least we will survive..

hang in there, stay strong and focused, believe me I know its hard,but
it will be well worth it, heck I think we went through the hard part already..
lets keep hope that things get better..it has to right??

EJG123

You're not stupid. You're just human and you let your guard down. Live and learn. You'll be okay.

MsPINKAcres

((beck))

Honey - You are not stupid!
You just made the same mistake many of us did - trusted someone who wasn't trust worthy!

I use to have a "Sticky" posted up at the top about what my ex did when I left - it was totally insane!!!!!! after 16 plus years of marriage, financial & emotional support of him during his struggles with addiction & alcoholism ~

I'm two years out and my life is PINKFANTABULIOUS!

We do recover and rebuild - it ain't easy - but we can put on our BIG GIRL Panties (I prefer PINK ones), borrow some Steel Toe Bunny Slippers (I personally prefer PINK HIGH HEELS but to each his own) and make it!!

Don't give up before the miracles happen for you - YOU deserve them!!!

PINK HUGS,
Rita

Abundance

There was a poster on here that would point out the amount of time it took for her to get back on the program, if you will.... and each time it took a smaller amount of time. It was awesome!

I know I did the back and forth thing and the faster I got back on my program or the less baloney I put up with or the quicker I would stop being in his disfunction - I knew I was healing - getting better for myself.

You are doing just that! Thank goodness you are protected legally. I didn't have anything legally shared with my ex-ah... but I did get off the lease in the house and moved out because he wasn't going anywhere! YET - I am the one who paid everything.

Sometimes we just need these little reminders to tell us .... yup... we are doing the right thing!!!

Kindeyes

Don't beat yourself up and please.....be gentle with yourself. Most of us understand the trauma that you've been through in dealing with an alcoholic/addict. The last thing you need is more self inflicted trauma.

Take care of you.

gentle hugs
ke

beckkkk

Thank you all so much for the support!

Today I am not so hard on myself. I took a good look at all that happened and realized as soon as I saw what he was doing I shut it DOWN! I am proud of myself for seeing it for what it was!

I will never be in that situation with him again. Will I slip up again? It is possible. I don't want to...but I am not perfect. If I do slip up I know what to do.

Thanks again. The support here is amazing

((I love pink too!!!))