afreshstart

Hi,

I've got to be at my all time lowest point at the moment. I've been suffering with depression for 18 months now and last year I managed to stay off the booze for 6 months, so I know I can do it. It's got to a stage now though, that I feel like I need a drink late afternoon and I know it's wrong, so I've been hiding it. My Husband has found what I've been drinking and I'm now so frightened that he's going to leave me. I know that it's only me that can stop me from drinking. I know I'll be such a better happier person off it, and that my Husband and Children will benefit hugely.

I've just been drinking too much lately, so I've put weight on which has made me more depressed. I'm in a viscious circle.

This is my last chance to go sober!

Rachel x

EmeraldRose

Glad you're here...! I'm sorry to hear you went back to it after 6 months. But at least this way you know you can do it at least that long -this time double it!!

Put down the booze and go for a walk. Great excerise and gets your mind thinking about other stuff but booze. I just came back from taking my dogs for a hike around town. The sun finally is out. A beautiful day to walk and clean out the cobwebs in the ol' cranial membrane.

Dee74

Support was the key for me Rachel - noone does this alone, IMO....are you thinking of face to face support as well?

Good to see another Aussie here - welcome

D

Anna

Hi Rachel,

I remember being caught in the vicious cycle too, and it's horrible. You feel bad so you drink, then you feel worse, so you drink again. It never ends unless you take action, and coming here is a good thing to do. There is lots of support here.

When you stopped drinking for 6 months, what other changes did you make in your life?

Auggie

I'm glad you are here. Keep reading and posting. I look forward to hearing more about you. You can do this!

afreshstart

Thanks guys,

Last time when I was sober I threw myself in to healthy eating and did lots of exercise which totally helped me to stop thinking about the booze, so I know I've got to do it that way. I've been reading a self-help book and have made lots of notes, so I'm carrying the book around with me!!

Anna

It sounds like you have a good plan, and be sure to keep reading and posting here!

least

Welcome to the family. Living sober really rocks.

artsoul

welcome to the forum! Glad you're getting sober again. We all know what it feels like to be stuck in that cycle - it's hard to break but once we do life is so much better.

Stick around and keep reading/posting. It's a great place to come when you need support or if you just need a reminder that you don't want to go back to drinking again.

Winer249er

I relate to what you're situation is. I too kicked it for a few months, then went back to drinking.

I'm getting ready to get up, dust myself off and to try again. Perhaps this next time will be easier because we know what we're up against. We know what went wrong the first time, yes?

Take care of the depression. Can you see a doctor right away? It's important, k?

Best to you,
W249r

Humbled77

Your husband knows you are drinking and hiding it. I hid my heavy drinking from my wife and then one day decided to stop and came completely clean with her. She was surprised (I am sneaky I guess), and of course she was pissed, not about the drinking but about the lying. Didn't expect that. Once she processed everything she jumped right on the support band wagon, a huge help. Have you sat down and had a honest conversation with your husband? If you quit his 100% support would be really beneficial. Going this road alone is all but impossible.

afreshstart

I'm going to sit down with him tonight and explain why I've done the things I've done. I know he'll support me if he knows I mean it for good. It's passed 5pm and no cravings