Hope things stay calm!
Hope things stay calm!
So my AS went to jail for 90 days... Well that was his scentence.. He was released on an ankle monitor to house arrest after 21 days. He was working at the jail 6 days a week which was suppose to be for a month and a half. It has been 7 days since he stared this.. he was released today from the ankle monitor. They drug tested him, which he passed and I guess he is all done. So, now I pray that he stay's clean and continues with his great new found attitiude. I will be laying down the house rules today. I seriously can not handle the roller coaster ride of addiction that I have had to deal with for the past 3 years.
Wish us luck!!!
Wish us luck!!!
The sentences and then quick release are laughable . . . we talk about letting them feel the consequences of their actions but its hardly anything.
I wish strength for you to set your boundaries and stick by them. You do NOT need to ride on the rollercoaster with him, if he steps on he can do it on his own and you can walk away.
I wish strength for you to set your boundaries and stick by them. You do NOT need to ride on the rollercoaster with him, if he steps on he can do it on his own and you can walk away.
I have written down what I will be telling him tonight so I dont stray from my boundries:
I WILL NOT ever bail you out, give you a place to stay, be there for you to cry to when you have blown it again if you start back on the path of drugs etc.... I wont be putting money on your books in jail, I wont be visiting you or calling you, or paying for your meds or ANYTHING! This WAS IS LAST CHANCE!
I WILL NOT ever bail you out, give you a place to stay, be there for you to cry to when you have blown it again if you start back on the path of drugs etc.... I wont be putting money on your books in jail, I wont be visiting you or calling you, or paying for your meds or ANYTHING! This WAS IS LAST CHANCE!
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
I told my ex
"Your last chance WAS your last chance."
And I meant it.
Of course, that didn't stop him from pulling the same ol' BS and begging for one more last chance. But I was done. My boundaries had consequences. My boundaries were for me. Are yours for you? What are the consequences if someone tries to violate them? How will you protect yourself?
So say what you mean, mean what you say and don't say it mean. And respect yourself enough to follow thru.
Good luck!
"Your last chance WAS your last chance."
And I meant it.
Of course, that didn't stop him from pulling the same ol' BS and begging for one more last chance. But I was done. My boundaries had consequences. My boundaries were for me. Are yours for you? What are the consequences if someone tries to violate them? How will you protect yourself?
So say what you mean, mean what you say and don't say it mean. And respect yourself enough to follow thru.
Good luck!
Hi enodm. I know that we've not met before so I wanted to say hello & that I'm so happy for you that your son is clean & sober. I really do hope that he stays that way. I hope that you will really enjoy this time with him having a clear mind & heart & being his real self & imprint it on your mind & heart for memories that you can always fall back on, just in case, he should fall back into his old ways with addiction. Those memories can help you through alot of really bad times, I have learned from personal experience. Sometimes they can be so few & far between. This will help you to always remember that your real son is really still in there if he should go back out. Sometimes it's so easy to think that they are changed forever to something really awful. I really hope for you & your son's sake that he will maintain his freedom from addiction. I also know that you are doing the absolutely best thing to set your boundaries just in case. You matter too.
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